Daily Reese Journal, Vol. 4 (Weekend Edition)
We're a little late with the post-game analysis of this past weekend, but you Reese fanatics certainly haven't been forgotten.
Saturday's scheduled main event was The Party, a social event featuring a plethora of people that this journalist did not know, as I was hired to be Reese's alcohol-holder, Apples to Apples card-holder and co-analyst of annoying party guests. If a prize could be given to the most annoying of the guests that we analyzed, the winner would clearly be "Carl", who seemed to be the tragic bi-product of years and years of acting like a douche without someone coming to him and saying:
"Hey, Carl, look, I really think you need to re-think your entire personality. We can't stand it."
In a close second place was his partner, "Jackie" who used various fake accents for no reason (unless I missed someone saying that she had a multiple personality disorder) who wore a hat and seemed pretty good at awkwardly barging into conversations/games randomly.
We're getting ahead of ourselves, though, as The Party was not the highlight of the evening by any means. Prior to it, Reese and I allowed Jason to personally prepare food for us at his deli. It was a great meal with great conversation, despite Reese's desire to throw our table's number sign on the ground. This was followed by extremely tart organic lolipops, which one of us may or may not have thrown out a window in disgust. We then journeyed to Rita's for water ice. I'm not sure how it happened, but we managed to find the only Rita's on the East Coast that didn't have a single place to sit down. Even the air conditioning unit in the back of the building seemed unfit to use for sitting.
Later, after the party, we returned to Reese Headquarters where I briefly fell asleep while watching Death Proof and waiting for Reese to finish taking her monthly shower (which, honestly, she didn't even need. She could have easily gone another month). This is when we canoodled for great lengths of time.
In the morning, I attempted to sing Oliver's theme song, which did not impress anybody except myself. Also, I did not get pancakes like I was hoping for.
Saturday's scheduled main event was The Party, a social event featuring a plethora of people that this journalist did not know, as I was hired to be Reese's alcohol-holder, Apples to Apples card-holder and co-analyst of annoying party guests. If a prize could be given to the most annoying of the guests that we analyzed, the winner would clearly be "Carl", who seemed to be the tragic bi-product of years and years of acting like a douche without someone coming to him and saying:
"Hey, Carl, look, I really think you need to re-think your entire personality. We can't stand it."
In a close second place was his partner, "Jackie" who used various fake accents for no reason (unless I missed someone saying that she had a multiple personality disorder) who wore a hat and seemed pretty good at awkwardly barging into conversations/games randomly.
We're getting ahead of ourselves, though, as The Party was not the highlight of the evening by any means. Prior to it, Reese and I allowed Jason to personally prepare food for us at his deli. It was a great meal with great conversation, despite Reese's desire to throw our table's number sign on the ground. This was followed by extremely tart organic lolipops, which one of us may or may not have thrown out a window in disgust. We then journeyed to Rita's for water ice. I'm not sure how it happened, but we managed to find the only Rita's on the East Coast that didn't have a single place to sit down. Even the air conditioning unit in the back of the building seemed unfit to use for sitting.
Later, after the party, we returned to Reese Headquarters where I briefly fell asleep while watching Death Proof and waiting for Reese to finish taking her monthly shower (which, honestly, she didn't even need. She could have easily gone another month). This is when we canoodled for great lengths of time.
In the morning, I attempted to sing Oliver's theme song, which did not impress anybody except myself. Also, I did not get pancakes like I was hoping for.