I think we need a new strategy
Every survey lately seems to grind to an abrupt halt as Helen faces near-death by snakebite. And promptly freaks, ending the job for all concerned in no uncertain terms. Effing tiger-snakes. They're just so big, and no matter how many times it happens, Helen just cannot accept that it is okay for them to be 10cm from her as she bush-bashes.
*cut to Helen 250m into thick bracken with no way to tell which is better, forward or backward, as the tiger that just reared up at her disappears into the undergrowth and she has no phone coverage and of course we forgot our walkie-talkies and no-one is within yelling distance and if you get bitten and lie down nobody will ever find you and do you remember that friend who had to just lie down in his tent in Tasmania after being bitten and just see if he died, which just means freakout, and thumping the ground and jumping at every pademelon-thump, finally getting to the edge of the bracken and screaming for *bp* and her not hearing and Helen going spastic trying to find a non-bracken way to get to a high point to try to check if *bp* has been struck down by the very same snake or one of its friends that she is sure are everywhere and totally out to destroy all humans. Helen loses the ability to make brain-sentences.*
See, what we need to do is rid the country of all vegetation. Reckon that would do it.
Obviously 'too soon' to suggest the obvious :P
*cut to Helen 250m into thick bracken with no way to tell which is better, forward or backward, as the tiger that just reared up at her disappears into the undergrowth and she has no phone coverage and of course we forgot our walkie-talkies and no-one is within yelling distance and if you get bitten and lie down nobody will ever find you and do you remember that friend who had to just lie down in his tent in Tasmania after being bitten and just see if he died, which just means freakout, and thumping the ground and jumping at every pademelon-thump, finally getting to the edge of the bracken and screaming for *bp* and her not hearing and Helen going spastic trying to find a non-bracken way to get to a high point to try to check if *bp* has been struck down by the very same snake or one of its friends that she is sure are everywhere and totally out to destroy all humans. Helen loses the ability to make brain-sentences.*
See, what we need to do is rid the country of all vegetation. Reckon that would do it.
Obviously 'too soon' to suggest the obvious :P