issues
im so anxious right now. im in a hole that i cant tell anyone about except my brother. i told him earlier and hes helping me out. that kid is so cool. but i hope it all works out. the timing has to be perfect or im fucked.
i ran out of money (again) and sold ALL of my dvds. rob yelled at me for selling them. he said he would have loaned me money but i dont want him to have that over me. plus i owe so much money to my mother and heather already.
ann called to say that i have to give the keys to the apartment to the neighbor by friday afternoon and get all my shit out too. now i have to figure out how im going to get my tv and mini fridge out of there by friday afternoon before i give the keys to the guy. i wish she had given me more notice. it was really nice of ann and art to let me stay there for two weeks but now they're acting like assholes. i dont know what i did.
i have two job interviews on friday! but i have to call out sick to go to them. i hope i dont get caught, just in case i dont get the jobs. i cant work at steve madden any more. i get dizzy spells the whole fucking day from the stress and athletic atmosphere. seriously, by the end of the day i dont know what hurts more my cut up feet (from the shoes i have to wear) or my legs (from climbing ladders every five minutes and squatting the rest of the time). it hurts so badly and one day off doesnt completely fix it. plus if someone yells at me for not "doubeling up" one more time im going to drive a steleto into their forehead! and customers, stop telling me that steve maddens shoes are too expecive. i dont set the prices and i dont buy them either. so fuck off, go accross the street to the throm brown outlit. fuckers.
im working on piecing my book together and its taking forever. i know exactly how i want it set up and what i want to say, but the words arent coming out.
after work tomorrow im going to robs where he will make me blueberry pancakes! ive been craving them forever and im finally going to get them. i love him!
this stress it killing me. i hate the position im in. im so fucking stupid.
im back on my diet. not have money for food really helps lol. i want to loose atleast ten lbs. i hate always being the biggest girl in the room. if i were on tv id be the "fat friend" of the main character. i feel like im not attractive any more. ive put on about ten lbs since last summer and i dont want rob to start seeing me as fat and not as good as i was when we started dating. i know he loves me, but i want him to find me attractive too. i dont want to be mush in his arms anymore.
i ran out of money (again) and sold ALL of my dvds. rob yelled at me for selling them. he said he would have loaned me money but i dont want him to have that over me. plus i owe so much money to my mother and heather already.
ann called to say that i have to give the keys to the apartment to the neighbor by friday afternoon and get all my shit out too. now i have to figure out how im going to get my tv and mini fridge out of there by friday afternoon before i give the keys to the guy. i wish she had given me more notice. it was really nice of ann and art to let me stay there for two weeks but now they're acting like assholes. i dont know what i did.
i have two job interviews on friday! but i have to call out sick to go to them. i hope i dont get caught, just in case i dont get the jobs. i cant work at steve madden any more. i get dizzy spells the whole fucking day from the stress and athletic atmosphere. seriously, by the end of the day i dont know what hurts more my cut up feet (from the shoes i have to wear) or my legs (from climbing ladders every five minutes and squatting the rest of the time). it hurts so badly and one day off doesnt completely fix it. plus if someone yells at me for not "doubeling up" one more time im going to drive a steleto into their forehead! and customers, stop telling me that steve maddens shoes are too expecive. i dont set the prices and i dont buy them either. so fuck off, go accross the street to the throm brown outlit. fuckers.
im working on piecing my book together and its taking forever. i know exactly how i want it set up and what i want to say, but the words arent coming out.
after work tomorrow im going to robs where he will make me blueberry pancakes! ive been craving them forever and im finally going to get them. i love him!
this stress it killing me. i hate the position im in. im so fucking stupid.
im back on my diet. not have money for food really helps lol. i want to loose atleast ten lbs. i hate always being the biggest girl in the room. if i were on tv id be the "fat friend" of the main character. i feel like im not attractive any more. ive put on about ten lbs since last summer and i dont want rob to start seeing me as fat and not as good as i was when we started dating. i know he loves me, but i want him to find me attractive too. i dont want to be mush in his arms anymore.