This is Long!
This is long….
Well, longer then usual.
I had a dream.
I was in an audience watching a poor rendition of a Shakespearian play. We were all trying to hold back our laughter but hardly could. And then I awoke. But the sound I woke to was not my laughter, rather a gargling choking. Sable was positioned above me stroking my face. “Are you ok”? He asked twice. I was. He rolled over and feel asleep. That morning I spoke to him about it but he didn’t remember. It’s sweet really that he could respond to me in his drowsy twilight so calmly and gently. Very endearing. But even so I couldn’t help but notice he’s almost out of smokes, much faster then last time. Probably quicidence as he is much the experienced smoker.
I don’t write about this much but this is me sharing.
The pain associated bothered me. I think I had a small one that night and another last night too. Yesterday at work I was very light sensitive and week when walking around. I was careful to look normal. Smile at all the right moments, don’t wear sunglasses in doors, things of that nature. I came home and crawled into bed. I slept until Sable came home. He woke me to go look at another car but my head hurt so badly I insisted on sleeping more. I missed another dose of meds. I woke a few times in the night. Once on my side with my jaw clinched tight. I adjusted and heard my shoulders and neck all realign. Just sitting caused a sever pain in my brain on my right side. I could pin point it. I feel back to sleep.
When I got up this morning at 4am I stood and the pain followed. A sharp instant pain to the right side of my brain. “Bump, Bump…” Then nothing My vision is lost with the pain and I am stopped in my tracks. I am adamit about refusing pain killer but when that pain revisits for the moment after I consider them. Fortunately they are nowhere in reach. I called off work. I know what is causing this. Added stress, “female monthly hormones”, a missed dose here or there, and irregular eating. Throw that together and suddenly my triggers aren’t just irritants but causes. I’m mad at myself.
I called my Neurologist. I haven’t spoken with that office since ’05. They told me that it would cost me $275 to see them. I wanted to see her because when I wasn’t on my med’s I experienced this all …differently. As is expected. I just don’t think this is the best drug out there for me, it can’t be. What had really made me think though was how Sharrel found a shot to help with the MS. Well science is changing all the time. Did you know the Epilepsy is more common then MS, Childhood diabetes, or Stroke? So ok I’m feeling jealous and sad for myself but if it’s that common then where’s my shot? I wanted something better then what I’ve got lying around but the Dr. won’t talk to me over the phone.
I think I need a new job. Sad as this it I can’t get health insurance for under $4000 deductible at my existing job. THAT BLOWS!!!
There is a place hiring called Tomax. Any one heard of it?
It looks like they connect call agency’s to businesses in India. Kind of Evil.
I think what I should do is find out what kind of health insurance they have before I apply but I’m not sure how to go about it secretly.
Any ideas?
Well, longer then usual.
I had a dream.
I was in an audience watching a poor rendition of a Shakespearian play. We were all trying to hold back our laughter but hardly could. And then I awoke. But the sound I woke to was not my laughter, rather a gargling choking. Sable was positioned above me stroking my face. “Are you ok”? He asked twice. I was. He rolled over and feel asleep. That morning I spoke to him about it but he didn’t remember. It’s sweet really that he could respond to me in his drowsy twilight so calmly and gently. Very endearing. But even so I couldn’t help but notice he’s almost out of smokes, much faster then last time. Probably quicidence as he is much the experienced smoker.
I don’t write about this much but this is me sharing.
The pain associated bothered me. I think I had a small one that night and another last night too. Yesterday at work I was very light sensitive and week when walking around. I was careful to look normal. Smile at all the right moments, don’t wear sunglasses in doors, things of that nature. I came home and crawled into bed. I slept until Sable came home. He woke me to go look at another car but my head hurt so badly I insisted on sleeping more. I missed another dose of meds. I woke a few times in the night. Once on my side with my jaw clinched tight. I adjusted and heard my shoulders and neck all realign. Just sitting caused a sever pain in my brain on my right side. I could pin point it. I feel back to sleep.
When I got up this morning at 4am I stood and the pain followed. A sharp instant pain to the right side of my brain. “Bump, Bump…” Then nothing My vision is lost with the pain and I am stopped in my tracks. I am adamit about refusing pain killer but when that pain revisits for the moment after I consider them. Fortunately they are nowhere in reach. I called off work. I know what is causing this. Added stress, “female monthly hormones”, a missed dose here or there, and irregular eating. Throw that together and suddenly my triggers aren’t just irritants but causes. I’m mad at myself.
I called my Neurologist. I haven’t spoken with that office since ’05. They told me that it would cost me $275 to see them. I wanted to see her because when I wasn’t on my med’s I experienced this all …differently. As is expected. I just don’t think this is the best drug out there for me, it can’t be. What had really made me think though was how Sharrel found a shot to help with the MS. Well science is changing all the time. Did you know the Epilepsy is more common then MS, Childhood diabetes, or Stroke? So ok I’m feeling jealous and sad for myself but if it’s that common then where’s my shot? I wanted something better then what I’ve got lying around but the Dr. won’t talk to me over the phone.
I think I need a new job. Sad as this it I can’t get health insurance for under $4000 deductible at my existing job. THAT BLOWS!!!
There is a place hiring called Tomax. Any one heard of it?
It looks like they connect call agency’s to businesses in India. Kind of Evil.
I think what I should do is find out what kind of health insurance they have before I apply but I’m not sure how to go about it secretly.
Any ideas?