Dream Journal 08/08/18
It's 4 something in the morning, but I couldn't let this one slip away by waiting for the morning.
I'm sitting at a table with my parents, Tiffany, and possibly Adam and Erin in what felt like a resort hotel meeting place set up for dining. Like the sunday brunch after Kendra's Bats-Mitzvah except with square/rectangular tables instead of round. I don't think we had food at that point because for whatever reason a conversation was struck with the large group at another table in the room. The question of what brings them here was asked until it is realized that my father's side of the family, mainly Aunt Lorraine's part and I think Gary, is among them. I happily state "It's my fathers side of the family" as I'm getting up greet people.
Among them is my grandmother who passed away in 1997 when I was 17. She had Alzheimers and moved into Freedom Square in Seminole when I was in my teens and was moved into the memory unit, then eventually the nursing home portion as the disease took us away from her. Before that she lived in Mainlands Village off of US 19 in Pinellas Park. Due to being in my teens and feeling completely awkward, I didn't get to know her before she died. The last time I saw her was towards the end, but by that point she was more or less trapped in a withered form unable to communicate by any means I could understand. Now back to the dream.
There was a sudden scene switch that goes unnoticed, as dreams do, to my paraent's house. At this point I'm trying to get her attention to introduce myself, knowing she won't recognize me because of the disease. I make several unsuccessful attempts as she's crawling and hobbling from place to place because she's stubborn and doesn't want help. After she gets out of the guest bathroom and walking into Adam's old room I kneel down, because for whatever reason as she became frail she shrunk to 3 foot something, and call her by name(Sonya). She turns around, walks up to me, and I introduce myself, "I'm your grandson Ryan, Richard's son". She gets a look of remembrance of her face and hugs me. I mentioned Adam and tell her I missed her as I'm tearing up into her shoulder. She pulls back enough that we're face to face and tells me she's 110(because dream and me not know how old she'd have been if she was will alive. She'd be 100 or 101 now) and it's some kind of dance that I already can't remember the name of. She implied she can't live forever and it's okay to say goodbye.
I woke up at that point just about crying as I am right now thinking about it. That's probably the closest I'll come to saying goodbye to her since I couldn't when she was alive, or at least didn't because she wasn't really there anymore the last time I saw her.
It's now 6a and I'm going to try to get some more sleep before heading down to my parent's house today.
I'm sitting at a table with my parents, Tiffany, and possibly Adam and Erin in what felt like a resort hotel meeting place set up for dining. Like the sunday brunch after Kendra's Bats-Mitzvah except with square/rectangular tables instead of round. I don't think we had food at that point because for whatever reason a conversation was struck with the large group at another table in the room. The question of what brings them here was asked until it is realized that my father's side of the family, mainly Aunt Lorraine's part and I think Gary, is among them. I happily state "It's my fathers side of the family" as I'm getting up greet people.
Among them is my grandmother who passed away in 1997 when I was 17. She had Alzheimers and moved into Freedom Square in Seminole when I was in my teens and was moved into the memory unit, then eventually the nursing home portion as the disease took us away from her. Before that she lived in Mainlands Village off of US 19 in Pinellas Park. Due to being in my teens and feeling completely awkward, I didn't get to know her before she died. The last time I saw her was towards the end, but by that point she was more or less trapped in a withered form unable to communicate by any means I could understand. Now back to the dream.
There was a sudden scene switch that goes unnoticed, as dreams do, to my paraent's house. At this point I'm trying to get her attention to introduce myself, knowing she won't recognize me because of the disease. I make several unsuccessful attempts as she's crawling and hobbling from place to place because she's stubborn and doesn't want help. After she gets out of the guest bathroom and walking into Adam's old room I kneel down, because for whatever reason as she became frail she shrunk to 3 foot something, and call her by name(Sonya). She turns around, walks up to me, and I introduce myself, "I'm your grandson Ryan, Richard's son". She gets a look of remembrance of her face and hugs me. I mentioned Adam and tell her I missed her as I'm tearing up into her shoulder. She pulls back enough that we're face to face and tells me she's 110(because dream and me not know how old she'd have been if she was will alive. She'd be 100 or 101 now) and it's some kind of dance that I already can't remember the name of. She implied she can't live forever and it's okay to say goodbye.
I woke up at that point just about crying as I am right now thinking about it. That's probably the closest I'll come to saying goodbye to her since I couldn't when she was alive, or at least didn't because she wasn't really there anymore the last time I saw her.
It's now 6a and I'm going to try to get some more sleep before heading down to my parent's house today.