original, "Aline for Robert"eponinesyndromeSeptember 1 2010, 21:11:34 UTC
She dreams in black white, of spies and ladies in trench coats and heels. She sleeps underneath a sea of baby blue- Marie Antoinette blue, she calls it- lapping at her thin, milky legs. She drinks coffee like water, smokes a million thin, toxic cigarettes a day, and she laughs when people warn her about her health. She's lazy, but she can get away with it- because she's glamorous and pretty, because she can feign 'lost in translation.' She smells of Chanel and smoke, of shampoo and fresh air, leaving a stream of heady perfume in her wake, trailing behind a sheet of knotted, golden hair. She purses her bow lips when she doesn't get her away. She screams in French and curses like a sailor. She's stubborn and selfish and extremely hard to please. But she's also stranded in a city not her own- thrown into the melting pot of the United States with only two Parisienne legs to stand on. She misses her mother and her sister, her nephew and the family dog- all still happily rooted in France. She feels limbless, sick, lost, and untethered. America isn't bad but it isn't home. There are no old palaces, little villages on the coast, no proper cobblestone streets. She hates the coffee here- though she downs it by the liter- and she whines about the bread and the cheese. She's a European in America and, while she chose this fate, she hates it. She arrives late to work most days because she can't get out of bed. She lies underneath her baby blue and sings 'Sur le Pont d'Avignon' to herself until she's crying. Because the only place she sees Paris is in her dreams now- because the only place she hears French is in her sleep- and she wants to go home. But she can't.
Because he rumples her Marie Antoinette blue and wraps his arms around her tiny middle. Because he drinks water and throws away her cigarettes. He runs and cycles, and he's productive. He's at work on time and he's nice- to everyone- except when he loses his temper. He can be explosive, scathing, brutal, but he can't curse in front of her- because she's a lady- even though she probably wouldn't understand half the swear words he knows. But his dark, dark eyes always soften to her, his hands find their way to her waist and her face, and he forgets why he was angry. Because he smells like detergent and comfort where she can't get any. Because his family lives in New Jersey, and though they don't know French they love her. Because he gives her a place to go on Christmas and Easter, because he celebrates Bastille Day and pretends French just for her. Because his brown hair is soft and beautiful between her fingers. Because he gets her out of bed and makes real life sometimes better than her black and white dreams. Because he pulls her into technicolor and wipes away her tears. Because he loves her. Because she loves him so much that it hurts- the ache dwarfs even her homesickness. She stays.
Because he rumples her Marie Antoinette blue and wraps his arms around her tiny middle. Because he drinks water and throws away her cigarettes. He runs and cycles, and he's productive. He's at work on time and he's nice- to everyone- except when he loses his temper. He can be explosive, scathing, brutal, but he can't curse in front of her- because she's a lady- even though she probably wouldn't understand half the swear words he knows. But his dark, dark eyes always soften to her, his hands find their way to her waist and her face, and he forgets why he was angry. Because he smells like detergent and comfort where she can't get any. Because his family lives in New Jersey, and though they don't know French they love her. Because he gives her a place to go on Christmas and Easter, because he celebrates Bastille Day and pretends French just for her. Because his brown hair is soft and beautiful between her fingers. Because he gets her out of bed and makes real life sometimes better than her black and white dreams. Because he pulls her into technicolor and wipes away her tears. Because he loves her. Because she loves him so much that it hurts- the ache dwarfs even her homesickness. She stays.
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