(no subject)
I'm not in the habit of narrating my life anymore. But I want to keep the livejournal alive, even if it's on life support. Pencils shooting from an IV drip. Watch out!
I have a really terrible habit of taking one positive quality in a boyfriend and trying to sustain a relationship with it. Luckily, in this case it's the sex. I mean, I wasn't even attracted to Jarrod "that way," but once we had sex there was no way that show was going off the air. And the absence of dialogue, such an enjoyable experience. I mean, fluff talk just to glossify the sexiness. But it's like, the difference between Mapquest and On-Star.
And of course, the no-brainer attractors exist. General politeness, a quality far more rare in Louisiana but an unprovoked way of life in Birmingham. With all guys. I love that. Jarrod's particularly understanding about female habits, growing up with a single mom. He said he first learned how to drive with his knee by watching his mother do it while simultaneously applying makeup.
But. There's something missing in Jarrod, that was missing in Jeff...conversationally. I've said it before, and I'll probably say it again. But when I talk to someone, no matter who it is, I want to have a cohesive exchange of thought. And I don't want someone who's going to listen out of politeness, or even respect. I want to create interest. I come across it everywhere, and it seems like what I consider to be as paramount as a meteor hitting the earth...is like a raindrop to Jarrod.
He almost always brings the topic back to what he's done. What's happened. Not how or why and what the effect will be, just a transcript.
I know we all have brains that interpret different ways, but I don't see how people can carry on that way, just bystanding the activities of their lives.
I want to know every little thought passing through his head. Synapse to synapse. But if I could, would I like what I find?
My curiosity outweighs my fear.
But of course, I describe what I think I want without ever having experienced it. I think I'd go into cognitive arrest.
I have a really terrible habit of taking one positive quality in a boyfriend and trying to sustain a relationship with it. Luckily, in this case it's the sex. I mean, I wasn't even attracted to Jarrod "that way," but once we had sex there was no way that show was going off the air. And the absence of dialogue, such an enjoyable experience. I mean, fluff talk just to glossify the sexiness. But it's like, the difference between Mapquest and On-Star.
And of course, the no-brainer attractors exist. General politeness, a quality far more rare in Louisiana but an unprovoked way of life in Birmingham. With all guys. I love that. Jarrod's particularly understanding about female habits, growing up with a single mom. He said he first learned how to drive with his knee by watching his mother do it while simultaneously applying makeup.
But. There's something missing in Jarrod, that was missing in Jeff...conversationally. I've said it before, and I'll probably say it again. But when I talk to someone, no matter who it is, I want to have a cohesive exchange of thought. And I don't want someone who's going to listen out of politeness, or even respect. I want to create interest. I come across it everywhere, and it seems like what I consider to be as paramount as a meteor hitting the earth...is like a raindrop to Jarrod.
He almost always brings the topic back to what he's done. What's happened. Not how or why and what the effect will be, just a transcript.
I know we all have brains that interpret different ways, but I don't see how people can carry on that way, just bystanding the activities of their lives.
I want to know every little thought passing through his head. Synapse to synapse. But if I could, would I like what I find?
My curiosity outweighs my fear.
But of course, I describe what I think I want without ever having experienced it. I think I'd go into cognitive arrest.