He also enjoys chewing anything BUT the things I buy for him
This is like cats and boxes.
You: Buy cat shiny toy Cat: locates a box in which to sit. Sits. Stares at you as you attempt to entice with toy. You: Buy catnip. Cat: locates a smaller box (shoebox for first-grader shoes, for instance) in which to sit. Disdains drugs (until 2:54 am at which point rolls in at length and then commences racing stonedly about house, starting and stopping suddenly and whacking into things and periodically flopping on back like a dog wanting belly rubs in order to examine the upside down carpet some more). Stares at you. You: Drag string for cat to play with. Cat: locates box which originally held a mug. Steps in with all four feet. Settles directly down over edges of box. Stares at you with in death-plotting manner if you laugh at the fact your cat is now mushroom-shaped. You: Give up. Cat: gets out of box and winds around your ankles until you fall down on top of string. You: Drag string. Cat: locates box which originally held a Christmas-tree ornament. Attempts to settle, falls over with all four feet in box. You: laugh until you cry. Cat: sits with back to you for four days.
He also enjoys chewing anything BUT the things I buy for him
This is like cats and boxes.
You: Buy cat shiny toy
Cat: locates a box in which to sit. Sits. Stares at you as you attempt to entice with toy.
You: Buy catnip.
Cat: locates a smaller box (shoebox for first-grader shoes, for instance) in which to sit. Disdains drugs (until 2:54 am at which point rolls in at length and then commences racing stonedly about house, starting and stopping suddenly and whacking into things and periodically flopping on back like a dog wanting belly rubs in order to examine the upside down carpet some more). Stares at you.
You: Drag string for cat to play with.
Cat: locates box which originally held a mug. Steps in with all four feet. Settles directly down over edges of box. Stares at you with in death-plotting manner if you laugh at the fact your cat is now mushroom-shaped.
You: Give up.
Cat: gets out of box and winds around your ankles until you fall down on top of string.
You: Drag string.
Cat: locates box which originally held a Christmas-tree ornament. Attempts to settle, falls over with all four feet in box.
You: laugh until you cry.
Cat: sits with back to you for four days.
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It's SO true.
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Your brain, when you are finished with it, should be bronzed.
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