Long night
Almost a year ago, Justin and I broke up after the worst night of my life. A month and a half later, I began casually dating Justin's friend, Matt (the very same one from that night). Things with Matt were great until I discovered he was sleeping with another girl, which happened to be the day after my roommate tried to hook up with Justin. After that weekend, I didn't see or speak to either of them (excluding passing by on campus, and that one night they both drunk dialed me) until recently. A few weeks ago, Matt facebooked me, and began asking how I've been, what I'm up to and if I was free to hang out. I was obviously very cautious considering how he'd treated me over the summer, but soon all the old, unresolved feelings were back. I was certain things wouldn't be as complicated as they'd been before because he and Justin aren't really friends anymore (it has nothing to do with me), and he seems to have really grown up in the last few months (how many college boys quit drinking when they turn 21 so they can be more serious students and focus on their education?). That was, until last night.
Last night was my friend's senior prom, and since her boyfriend couldn't go with her, she opted not to go at all. Instead, we (me, Chelsea, and Kalen) decided to go dancing at Aura. We arrived and ordered a drink and set out to find some boys to dance with. Unfortunately, we faced many obstacles, the most hindering being the lack of boys there in the first place. So we began searching through our phones trying to find any boys in town who were 21 or had a fake ID that would come dance with us. I texted my coworker, Chelsea texted her boyfriend, and Kalen texted Justin...
Ben and Justin ended up coming down to meet us, but convinced us to go to a bar instead where they wouldn't have to pay a cover, and the drinks would be cheaper. so we followed them. I was surprised at how fine I was with Justin giving me the cold shoulder, but all that changed once we got to the bar. He became very affectionate and kept trying to kiss me and put his arm around me. To make the long story short, he told me he missed me and that I should come over. I said no thank you, and have never felt so proud of myself in my life.
Later that night, after we'd all went home and were in bed, I received a phone call from Justin asking for a ride home because he was a few miles from his apartment, and he'd lost the money for the bus. I was tired and not really in the mood to drive around looking for him and is friend, but I've always had a weakness for drunk boys needing rides home. Anyway, I pulled up to his apartment and said good-bye when he took my keys and told me I had to come in for a dance party. I thought he was joking (considering it was 3:30am) and followed him, trying to wrestle my keys away. Fast forward to 6:30am, and I was finally on my way back home.
Nothing happened. At all. We spent the whole time talking and catching up and joking around and it reminded me of how it used to be. He apologized for how he acted last spring, and seemed genuinely sad we weren't friends anymore. It was a great conversation, and I was happy to sacrifice my precious sleep for it. I just don't really know what to expect from him now, He was pretty drunk, and some of what he was saying seemed too good to me true (how much he missed me and thinks about me), but nonetheless, I can't help but wonder if a reconciliation is in the making.
More than anything, I'm just really confused. I don't understand why after not speaking for so long, Matt and Justin are back in my life. I wish I knew what their intentions were, and if either is a safe choice, but I don't. I have no idea what the next few weeks will hold for me.
Last night was my friend's senior prom, and since her boyfriend couldn't go with her, she opted not to go at all. Instead, we (me, Chelsea, and Kalen) decided to go dancing at Aura. We arrived and ordered a drink and set out to find some boys to dance with. Unfortunately, we faced many obstacles, the most hindering being the lack of boys there in the first place. So we began searching through our phones trying to find any boys in town who were 21 or had a fake ID that would come dance with us. I texted my coworker, Chelsea texted her boyfriend, and Kalen texted Justin...
Ben and Justin ended up coming down to meet us, but convinced us to go to a bar instead where they wouldn't have to pay a cover, and the drinks would be cheaper. so we followed them. I was surprised at how fine I was with Justin giving me the cold shoulder, but all that changed once we got to the bar. He became very affectionate and kept trying to kiss me and put his arm around me. To make the long story short, he told me he missed me and that I should come over. I said no thank you, and have never felt so proud of myself in my life.
Later that night, after we'd all went home and were in bed, I received a phone call from Justin asking for a ride home because he was a few miles from his apartment, and he'd lost the money for the bus. I was tired and not really in the mood to drive around looking for him and is friend, but I've always had a weakness for drunk boys needing rides home. Anyway, I pulled up to his apartment and said good-bye when he took my keys and told me I had to come in for a dance party. I thought he was joking (considering it was 3:30am) and followed him, trying to wrestle my keys away. Fast forward to 6:30am, and I was finally on my way back home.
Nothing happened. At all. We spent the whole time talking and catching up and joking around and it reminded me of how it used to be. He apologized for how he acted last spring, and seemed genuinely sad we weren't friends anymore. It was a great conversation, and I was happy to sacrifice my precious sleep for it. I just don't really know what to expect from him now, He was pretty drunk, and some of what he was saying seemed too good to me true (how much he missed me and thinks about me), but nonetheless, I can't help but wonder if a reconciliation is in the making.
More than anything, I'm just really confused. I don't understand why after not speaking for so long, Matt and Justin are back in my life. I wish I knew what their intentions were, and if either is a safe choice, but I don't. I have no idea what the next few weeks will hold for me.