Poor Preparation
Some days I wish I'd gone to college for elementary ed or psychology. A degree in accounting just has not prepared me well to be a parent. And it's the hardest job I've ever had. Not to mention the only one I can't quit. I have "Super Nanny" on TV in the background right now and I'm only typing during commercials (side note- my own mother always got up and did something else during commercials, the whole time I was growing up). I guess I'm trying to catch up and glean some information that's going to make parenting at least doable. Maybe this Mom gig is the final exam I have the recurring dream about- the one in the class I totally forgot I was even enrolled in until I saw it on my finals schedule.
One of the big things that's frustrating me these days is that I don't feel like my kids respect me. Maybe it's just the way kids are, but it seems that I have to tell them the same thing over and over and over, louder and louder and louder, before it finally gets through. The mom on SN is dealing with the same issue with her sons, progressed to a much more difficult level. Dh & I don't behave passively like the parents on the show, so that's not our main problem. I can certainly relate to the lack of energy they are experiencing, though. How everything seems just too hard to put into action. Parenting is unbelievably hard and I feel woefully unprepared for the job. To top it off, as soon as I think I've got one phase figured out, they go and grow into a whole new one!
I got a clue from a poster I saw at the YMCA tonight. It said something about people respecting you only if they can see that you respect yourself. I forget or deny most of the time that I live my life in a fishbowl now and my children are watching everything I do. Because I'm such a perfectionist, I'll go through streaks of trying to do it all "right", then something happens and I slip up so I throw it all away and tell myself I'll do better "tomorrow." But sadly, tomorrow is always a day away. I need help finding the middle ground, where an occasional mistake is okay yet the overall picture is of me being a good model for my kids.
This is starting to sound disjointed and rambling. Oh well, I guess thoughts are sometimes that way. It was a particularly hard morning (long beach towel drama between G-man and Cakes). There will be better days.
One of the big things that's frustrating me these days is that I don't feel like my kids respect me. Maybe it's just the way kids are, but it seems that I have to tell them the same thing over and over and over, louder and louder and louder, before it finally gets through. The mom on SN is dealing with the same issue with her sons, progressed to a much more difficult level. Dh & I don't behave passively like the parents on the show, so that's not our main problem. I can certainly relate to the lack of energy they are experiencing, though. How everything seems just too hard to put into action. Parenting is unbelievably hard and I feel woefully unprepared for the job. To top it off, as soon as I think I've got one phase figured out, they go and grow into a whole new one!
I got a clue from a poster I saw at the YMCA tonight. It said something about people respecting you only if they can see that you respect yourself. I forget or deny most of the time that I live my life in a fishbowl now and my children are watching everything I do. Because I'm such a perfectionist, I'll go through streaks of trying to do it all "right", then something happens and I slip up so I throw it all away and tell myself I'll do better "tomorrow." But sadly, tomorrow is always a day away. I need help finding the middle ground, where an occasional mistake is okay yet the overall picture is of me being a good model for my kids.
This is starting to sound disjointed and rambling. Oh well, I guess thoughts are sometimes that way. It was a particularly hard morning (long beach towel drama between G-man and Cakes). There will be better days.