So, what quadrant do you operate in?
Covey has this time management thing in the third habit “putting first things first”. Here is a very simplified example.
Habit one: You choose the program
Habit two: You write the program
Habit three: You run the program
The quadrants work this way:
Quadrant 1: Urgent and Important
Crisis management etc
Meeting deadlines
Quadrant 2: Not Urgent, but important
Relationship building
Planning
Preparing
Quadrant 3 Urgent but unimportant
Things that may seem important but aren’t they are just urgent distractions
Quadrant 4: Not urgent, not important
Time wasting distractions
Procrastination
Covey’s view is we should work in quadrant two. If not, we are at the mercy of pointless distractions or other peoples demands.
It was demonstrated to me very recently when a “crisis” arose in a relationship. So urgent and important things seemed to be the order of the day. “Solve the crisis to save the relationship”.
In my view, with hindsight, that is the thing which would probably destroy the relationship. To put all the energy into being protective or defensive, whilst urgent and important, it means the relationship is being controlled by external factors - people or situations. NO FUN AT ALL!
So, my choice is to move back toward quadrant two. In quadrant two, we are in control. We call the shots. I want to get back to relating to each other, and having fun. Laughter, adventure and a flat stomach. Not worrying about external stuff - other peoples stuff.
This small experience has been a big lesson for all my relationships.
I need to move into a zone where I call the shots. Where I choose to enjoy, love, have fun together. And I need to build up the trust all people have in me, by keeping promises, honouring commitments.
Remember - my chosen zone is love... not fear. So fear only the unrestrained love...
So now I’m back in the zone. Don’t tell me how to live my life unless you like wasting your breath….
You can go further yourself with knowing about the Covey stuff. Here are some starter sites… http://www.cbentley.org/classes/Common/Habits7/Habits.htm ,
http://www.aps.edu/aps/wmhs/handbook/effective.html
Habit one: You choose the program
Habit two: You write the program
Habit three: You run the program
The quadrants work this way:
Quadrant 1: Urgent and Important
Crisis management etc
Meeting deadlines
Quadrant 2: Not Urgent, but important
Relationship building
Planning
Preparing
Quadrant 3 Urgent but unimportant
Things that may seem important but aren’t they are just urgent distractions
Quadrant 4: Not urgent, not important
Time wasting distractions
Procrastination
Covey’s view is we should work in quadrant two. If not, we are at the mercy of pointless distractions or other peoples demands.
It was demonstrated to me very recently when a “crisis” arose in a relationship. So urgent and important things seemed to be the order of the day. “Solve the crisis to save the relationship”.
In my view, with hindsight, that is the thing which would probably destroy the relationship. To put all the energy into being protective or defensive, whilst urgent and important, it means the relationship is being controlled by external factors - people or situations. NO FUN AT ALL!
So, my choice is to move back toward quadrant two. In quadrant two, we are in control. We call the shots. I want to get back to relating to each other, and having fun. Laughter, adventure and a flat stomach. Not worrying about external stuff - other peoples stuff.
This small experience has been a big lesson for all my relationships.
I need to move into a zone where I call the shots. Where I choose to enjoy, love, have fun together. And I need to build up the trust all people have in me, by keeping promises, honouring commitments.
Remember - my chosen zone is love... not fear. So fear only the unrestrained love...
So now I’m back in the zone. Don’t tell me how to live my life unless you like wasting your breath….
You can go further yourself with knowing about the Covey stuff. Here are some starter sites… http://www.cbentley.org/classes/Common/Habits7/Habits.htm ,
http://www.aps.edu/aps/wmhs/handbook/effective.html