(no subject)
I'm becomming more and more dissatisfied with my life. I don't want to spend all of my time as some shitty bar watching my friends get inherbriated while I wish I was doing something else. Something better with my time. I wish I had more time to do the things I want to do. I wish I didn't have to work so much. Shit happens, I know. But if my mom hadn't married an asshole, who convinced her to sell my house, the house I grew up in. The house that got sold for a lot less than it was worth. The house I could still be living in, even if I had to pay some form of rent in. Things would be a lot easier on me. The easy I was told I would have while I went to college. Because everything is soo stressful. NO money to buy the things I want to have and to be able to live the life I want. No time to do the things I want. It just sucks. I'm sure half of everybody reading this is like, "Oh, what a baby. I've been having these problems for years and you don't see me complaining. Blah, blah, blah." Well, you know what, fuckers. Number one,I was told I wouldn't have these problems. Number two, until recently, I didn't have such problems. And number three, if you assholes weren't such alcoholics, you probably wouldn't have wasted your money away the last couple years.
Its annoying that my friends continuously harass me to drink more and go out more. I guess its nice that they like me and want to include me in the fun, but c'mon guys, I don't have the money or the time to go out as much as most of you. And I don't smoke and don't particularly enjoy being in some smoke filled bar for hours on end decreasing my lung compacity. Its just annoying. Then, I get home reaking of shitting bar smoke and hoping the smell decreases by the morning when I don't have time to shower.
And fuck you for saying that I sleep too much. I work my ass off doing all the things I need to do each day, and you have the balls to tell me that I would have more time if I didn't sleep as much. Fuck off. I work nearly full time, about 35-40 hours a week at a shitty job with annoying, rude, and unappreciative people. Most of whom are white trash, uneducated retards who take far too long to decide what sandwich they want. (Please don't come into a sandwich shop and have no idea what you want to get. There aren't that many choices. Its a very simple thing.) Then, I am also enrolled full time at KCC. The instructors are equally as white trash and seemingly uneducated (or just dense and poor speakers) as the people that come into Blimpie. They can't keep a schedule for the life of them. I pay way too much in tuition to go to classes that I have to teach myself. I just don't get it. Anyway. So after working and class, I come home where I go to work again. I do all the housework myself. With no help from anybody else. I do the cleaning, and the laundry, I get the bills together and mailed out on time. I often buy the groceries, too. But do I hear thank-yous? Rarely. Thank you, Miranda, for vaccuming and cleaning the house so it doesn't reak and isn't embarassing. Thank you for buying all the dishes I use daily. Or even making sure that the lights are turned off and the door is locked at night so we don't wasted electricity all night or get robbed or anything. Whatever.
Then, I think I'm dying. My body is rejecting itself. It says to me, on a daily basis, that it hates me. From gaining weight, to having a sore throat for nearly a year, to becoming allergic to everything to just tearing itself apart. My body hates me. I would work out. I would love to have the time to do that. Its relaxing both physically and mentally. But I don't have the time.
I think I may just stop going out ever--at all. I'd have more money and time then. That would be really nice. I could get my shit straightened out. I'd have time to do all my homework and projects. I'd save money. And I'd be able to go to bed every night without smelling like asscrack shit bar.
Its annoying that my friends continuously harass me to drink more and go out more. I guess its nice that they like me and want to include me in the fun, but c'mon guys, I don't have the money or the time to go out as much as most of you. And I don't smoke and don't particularly enjoy being in some smoke filled bar for hours on end decreasing my lung compacity. Its just annoying. Then, I get home reaking of shitting bar smoke and hoping the smell decreases by the morning when I don't have time to shower.
And fuck you for saying that I sleep too much. I work my ass off doing all the things I need to do each day, and you have the balls to tell me that I would have more time if I didn't sleep as much. Fuck off. I work nearly full time, about 35-40 hours a week at a shitty job with annoying, rude, and unappreciative people. Most of whom are white trash, uneducated retards who take far too long to decide what sandwich they want. (Please don't come into a sandwich shop and have no idea what you want to get. There aren't that many choices. Its a very simple thing.) Then, I am also enrolled full time at KCC. The instructors are equally as white trash and seemingly uneducated (or just dense and poor speakers) as the people that come into Blimpie. They can't keep a schedule for the life of them. I pay way too much in tuition to go to classes that I have to teach myself. I just don't get it. Anyway. So after working and class, I come home where I go to work again. I do all the housework myself. With no help from anybody else. I do the cleaning, and the laundry, I get the bills together and mailed out on time. I often buy the groceries, too. But do I hear thank-yous? Rarely. Thank you, Miranda, for vaccuming and cleaning the house so it doesn't reak and isn't embarassing. Thank you for buying all the dishes I use daily. Or even making sure that the lights are turned off and the door is locked at night so we don't wasted electricity all night or get robbed or anything. Whatever.
Then, I think I'm dying. My body is rejecting itself. It says to me, on a daily basis, that it hates me. From gaining weight, to having a sore throat for nearly a year, to becoming allergic to everything to just tearing itself apart. My body hates me. I would work out. I would love to have the time to do that. Its relaxing both physically and mentally. But I don't have the time.
I think I may just stop going out ever--at all. I'd have more money and time then. That would be really nice. I could get my shit straightened out. I'd have time to do all my homework and projects. I'd save money. And I'd be able to go to bed every night without smelling like asscrack shit bar.