InTheSouthOfEnglandSomwhere
In the south of England somwhere
they race lawn mowers.
The fastest goes 65 miles an hour
at top speed
with no head wind.
I dont know how men run along behind them
Unless it's the kind you sit on-
which seems like cheating.
There is a museum there
run by a fanatic
He has memorized and catalogued
the sound each mower makes
noting fondly his favorite three.
There are also worm charming contests
Three people to a team
One to charm
one to collect
one to count
.
Local John McCallister reassures us,
"It's on a strictly catch and release basis, of course."