"Scenes From A Life, Vampire" by Foo
*stares at the dustbunnies*
Um, so I joined the comm and didn't realize until I'd already almost finished something for the last challenge that my entry would be a bit... late.
I hope I won't be embarrassing myself too much with this, my first foray into writing H/D fanfiction, LOL.
Title: Scenes From A Life, Vampire
Author: Foo
Rating: G
Warnings: violent gourds, no beta
Summary: "Did you leave the pumpkin out after Christmas?"
“Did you leave the pumpkin out after Christmas?”
“Uh, yeah,” Harry said, not looking up from inspecting his breakfast. Draco had felt inventive again this morning. He was almost sure those were eggs.
“Oh brilliant, Potter,” Draco drawled with as much sarcasm as he could, which Harry had to admit was quite a bit. “Didn’t I tell you to make sure to dispose of it properly?”
Harry shrugged and began to eat. Food was food, after all, and he always kept some Stomach Settling draughts on hand. “So I’ll get rid of it today. No need to get your knickers in a twist. Sit down and eat. Or have some more coffee-I can tell you haven’t had your third cup yet.”
“Don’t patronize me. And good luck with the pumpkin, seeing as you’ll have to catch it first.”
“What?” Harry couldn’t have heard that right, but Draco had a particularly insufferable look on his face, so Harry probably did.
Draco smirked. “We have a vampire pumpkin.”
Harry blinked.
*
“Wotcher Harry, you know you have vampire pumpkin in your front yard?” Ron asked, hooking a thumb over his shoulder. “It almost bit Hermione’s finger off when she went and poked at it.”
Harry sighed. “Yeah, I know. Come on in, Ron.”
Ron shuffled in and was just taking off his coat when Hermione breezed through the front door, closing it against the chill of the evening.
“Hello Harry,” Hermione said cheerily, not looking a bit like someone who’d just almost lost a digit to a rabid squash. “Do you know I’ve never seen a wizarding vampire fruit or vegetable before? I’ve read about them, of course-“
“Of course,” Ron said, rolling his eyes.
“-but never actually ran across one myself. Your specimen is really quite fascinating. Very healthy and strong, you can tell by the teeth.” Hermione hung up her outer robes unwound her scarf. “Is it a project?” she asked, approvingly.
“Uh…”
“Don’t be daft,” Ron said, and accepted the bottle Harry handed him. “Harry probably just forgot to banish the rubbish.” He plopped himself down on the couch beside Harry and took a long swig of beer. “Thanks, mate.”
Hermione frowned but nevertheless gave Harry her customary buss on the cheek and went to settle down on the armchair by the fire. “It’s still an excellent example of its kind.”
“Thanks,” Harry said, but the smile he gave her was just a bit strained around the edges. “I think it fed on one of the gnomes today. It’s gotten a bit bigger since last night.”
Hermione’s brow puckered with worry.
“You have to get rid of it soon or it will get to be a right menace,” Ron advised, putting his feet up on the coffee table. It was something that annoyed Draco to no end, which was most likely why Ron always did it. “I remember when Fred and George wanted to get themselves a pet, and since mum wouldn’t let them be in charge of the health of a living creature, they decided to raise a vampire watermelon. It wasn’t until Percy almost lost his head while pruning the hedges that we realized what they’d done.” Ron smiled, apparently lost in a pleasant memory. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard Percy scream as loud since then.”
“Draco’s gotten attached to the thing after it attacked me while I was trying to banish it,” Harry told them, staring glumly at the bottle in his hands, “he’s named it Cartwright.”
**
Um, so I joined the comm and didn't realize until I'd already almost finished something for the last challenge that my entry would be a bit... late.
I hope I won't be embarrassing myself too much with this, my first foray into writing H/D fanfiction, LOL.
Title: Scenes From A Life, Vampire
Author: Foo
Rating: G
Warnings: violent gourds, no beta
Summary: "Did you leave the pumpkin out after Christmas?"
“Did you leave the pumpkin out after Christmas?”
“Uh, yeah,” Harry said, not looking up from inspecting his breakfast. Draco had felt inventive again this morning. He was almost sure those were eggs.
“Oh brilliant, Potter,” Draco drawled with as much sarcasm as he could, which Harry had to admit was quite a bit. “Didn’t I tell you to make sure to dispose of it properly?”
Harry shrugged and began to eat. Food was food, after all, and he always kept some Stomach Settling draughts on hand. “So I’ll get rid of it today. No need to get your knickers in a twist. Sit down and eat. Or have some more coffee-I can tell you haven’t had your third cup yet.”
“Don’t patronize me. And good luck with the pumpkin, seeing as you’ll have to catch it first.”
“What?” Harry couldn’t have heard that right, but Draco had a particularly insufferable look on his face, so Harry probably did.
Draco smirked. “We have a vampire pumpkin.”
Harry blinked.
*
“Wotcher Harry, you know you have vampire pumpkin in your front yard?” Ron asked, hooking a thumb over his shoulder. “It almost bit Hermione’s finger off when she went and poked at it.”
Harry sighed. “Yeah, I know. Come on in, Ron.”
Ron shuffled in and was just taking off his coat when Hermione breezed through the front door, closing it against the chill of the evening.
“Hello Harry,” Hermione said cheerily, not looking a bit like someone who’d just almost lost a digit to a rabid squash. “Do you know I’ve never seen a wizarding vampire fruit or vegetable before? I’ve read about them, of course-“
“Of course,” Ron said, rolling his eyes.
“-but never actually ran across one myself. Your specimen is really quite fascinating. Very healthy and strong, you can tell by the teeth.” Hermione hung up her outer robes unwound her scarf. “Is it a project?” she asked, approvingly.
“Uh…”
“Don’t be daft,” Ron said, and accepted the bottle Harry handed him. “Harry probably just forgot to banish the rubbish.” He plopped himself down on the couch beside Harry and took a long swig of beer. “Thanks, mate.”
Hermione frowned but nevertheless gave Harry her customary buss on the cheek and went to settle down on the armchair by the fire. “It’s still an excellent example of its kind.”
“Thanks,” Harry said, but the smile he gave her was just a bit strained around the edges. “I think it fed on one of the gnomes today. It’s gotten a bit bigger since last night.”
Hermione’s brow puckered with worry.
“You have to get rid of it soon or it will get to be a right menace,” Ron advised, putting his feet up on the coffee table. It was something that annoyed Draco to no end, which was most likely why Ron always did it. “I remember when Fred and George wanted to get themselves a pet, and since mum wouldn’t let them be in charge of the health of a living creature, they decided to raise a vampire watermelon. It wasn’t until Percy almost lost his head while pruning the hedges that we realized what they’d done.” Ron smiled, apparently lost in a pleasant memory. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard Percy scream as loud since then.”
“Draco’s gotten attached to the thing after it attacked me while I was trying to banish it,” Harry told them, staring glumly at the bottle in his hands, “he’s named it Cartwright.”
**