Gentleman Jim.
This is the story about a man named James
His name is James, but call him Jim, for he plays no games
A stone cold Republican, yeah, that was Jim
He worked security for a company to support his family
But Jim had a problem, he had a god awful demeanor
His wife tried her best, but he always demeaned her
And no matter what, Jim could do no wrong, he was made of Teflon
But in reality Gentleman Jim was quite the moron.
Jim wanted to teach his son how it was done
He wanted his boy to see the apple didn't fall far from the tree
For years his son tried, desperate to one day see the other side
In his room he would hide, in there his time he would bide
The boy wasn't dim, he was bright and he knew he wasn't like him
Things could get grim, but at least he knew he wasn't like Gentleman Jim.
Whenever Jim got mad, it was really quite sad
Nothing is rad when a lad can't even talk to his dad
Then one day the boy was pushing his cart at the local Wal-Mart
Thinkin' to himself that maybe growin' apart from dear old dad was good for the heart
He knew deep down inside that before the old man died
He'd confide that there was no chance he'd stand by alongside the bedside
The odds were slim that he'd stand by Gentleman Jim.
Yeah, and whenever Jim had the flu or was feelin' blue
He made sure the whole world knew, and to the skies the whole world flew
Any attempt to ease his pain was always in vain
You know your patience starts to wane when you're caught in the rain
And for a bore like Jim when it rains it pours
In Jim's world the sores, well, they come in fours
And whenever you hear the call, the call from down the hall
You know it's the gall, the gall of Gentleman Jim, who's really no gentleman at all.
His name is James, but call him Jim, for he plays no games
A stone cold Republican, yeah, that was Jim
He worked security for a company to support his family
But Jim had a problem, he had a god awful demeanor
His wife tried her best, but he always demeaned her
And no matter what, Jim could do no wrong, he was made of Teflon
But in reality Gentleman Jim was quite the moron.
Jim wanted to teach his son how it was done
He wanted his boy to see the apple didn't fall far from the tree
For years his son tried, desperate to one day see the other side
In his room he would hide, in there his time he would bide
The boy wasn't dim, he was bright and he knew he wasn't like him
Things could get grim, but at least he knew he wasn't like Gentleman Jim.
Whenever Jim got mad, it was really quite sad
Nothing is rad when a lad can't even talk to his dad
Then one day the boy was pushing his cart at the local Wal-Mart
Thinkin' to himself that maybe growin' apart from dear old dad was good for the heart
He knew deep down inside that before the old man died
He'd confide that there was no chance he'd stand by alongside the bedside
The odds were slim that he'd stand by Gentleman Jim.
Yeah, and whenever Jim had the flu or was feelin' blue
He made sure the whole world knew, and to the skies the whole world flew
Any attempt to ease his pain was always in vain
You know your patience starts to wane when you're caught in the rain
And for a bore like Jim when it rains it pours
In Jim's world the sores, well, they come in fours
And whenever you hear the call, the call from down the hall
You know it's the gall, the gall of Gentleman Jim, who's really no gentleman at all.