Update
Just a little warning...this post is going to be long. I have a lot of stuff to update on.
Six Flags with Rowland:
I picked up Rowland at 8:30am. I asked him how he was doing and he said not the greatest. So of course I said why? He said that he realized something about himself today...that he didn't like. He said that he went to bed the night before telling himself that he was NOT going to smoke before he went to six flags to me...and when he woke up in the morning he told himself the same thing. He totally had his mind set on not smoking...but when he finished getting ready 10min early and was sitting around doing nothing...he could not resist the temptation to smoke...and ended up smoking a joint. He realized that he needs help. It was good being able to talk to him about it. Of course six flags was fun, I am not going to talk about the rides, only the conversations that took place. All day long he was checking out girls, and talking to me about it...which of course I didn't want to hear. That was weird, and disturbing at the same time. Good thing I was wearing very modest clothing...and so he wasn't talking to me about myself. =) We talked about religion...and how he believes in reincarnation...and that he thinks he was a bird in his previous life...because he constantly dreams that he can fly. That was an interesting conversation. He also talked to me about his mom being an alcoholic his entire life...and how she would pass out almost every night right infront of him. =( I hurt for him when he told me that. All day long we had a fun time though...interesting conversations took place...and I was SO glad he did not try to flirt with me. Thanks for your prayers on that. Anyways, we left around 5:30pm because we were both worn out. On our way home, I noticed that he was calling his buddies to get together and smoke that night. After he was done, I said "so where are we going to dinner?" (trying to keep him from smoking with his friends). He was all, I can't, I just planned to hang with my buddies. So I said, so you are telling me that you're going to reject my invetation to dinner just to go smoke with you friends? He knows he is addicted, and so he felt bad, but he turned dinner down. I hate it when substances take over peoples lives. I know he wanted to go to dinner with me badly...but his desire to smoke over powered him. So I took him home...we talked for a lil more and we said our goodbyes.
Nathan's phone call:
RIGHT after I was done with my bible study last night, Nathan called me back...which was around 8:30pm. I had called him earlier asking him to call me. I wanted him to call because I wanted to know his deep feelings about me going to six flags with Rowland. So we talked, and basically he said "I didn't understand how you could go to six flags with a jerk such as Rowland and not even consider inviting me instead." So basically I was right, it was a whole jealousy issue. Nathan does NOT like nor approve of Rowland at all. He basically doesn't want me to hang out with him. But after telling him my reasons for hanging out with Rowland, he understood and cooled down a bit.
Then our conversation switched to religion. He possed a lot of questions to me, and we discussed many issues...such as salvation. He told me that he does not want to participate in a religion that says who is and is not going to heaven. He feels that we have no right to determine that. He was also talking to me about how it is hard for him to believe that the universe was created in only 7 days. Basically his purpose was to tell me that he doesn't think that everything in the bible is true.
OBVIOUSLY I debated with him on those issues...and we had an amazing discussion. I was talking to him about...how in the world does he know what is true and what is false in the bible. How could he EVER feel secure in knowing that. If you think one bit of the bible is false, you have no security in believing the rest is true.
We also talked about our past relationship which we had together the summer of my Junior year. I don't know if you guys know, but we are almost always open with each other about our thoughts. SO we discussed our feelings...of why our relationship ended...and our thoughts about when we were together.
We talked about what it is like to marry a non-virgin when you yourself are a virgin...as well as what it is like to marry a virgin when you yourself are not. Basically we used my brother Joel and Melinda as an example...as well as Nathan himself. He talked about how AWFUL he feels about losing his virginity. It has caused so much guilt in his life. Also how the virgin wouldn't want the non-virgin to think of anyone else but themselves when they were having intercourse...and how uncomfortable it would be if the non-virgin did. We went into depth about our feelings with these thoughts...and it is TOO much to type. If you want to talk to me more about this...go right on ahead.
I asked him about any negative thoughts he has had towards me these months of not talking to me. He said other than this week about Rowland, he has had none. The reason why he didn't call me was because he was depressed. He said he didn't call anyone. All his desire was...was to be alone. He had nothing against me.
Towards the end of the conversation we talked about how I feel called to do missions...and how it is almost 100% official I will not be living in the US...and I will be serving the Lord full time. So we discussed how that affects our friendship/future. How he feels that doesn't stop us from anything...because he is willing to go anywhere to play his music...and who knows how he will change in the years to come...or even myself. So that was in detail as well.
When we got to talking about God again, Nathan told me how much he enjoys discussing biblical things with me. He says that he gets my point of view...and likes how I am open minded to listening to his. He says that my words are so encouraging to him...in that he wants to seek the Lord more and more.
There was so much more that was said. I mean, we talked for 4 hours straight. If you want to know more, you can call me. This is all my hands are allowing me to type. My fingers ache now.
OH I have to say one more thing. Yesterday around 4:45pm my headache stuff came back. I realized that I forgot to take my medicine that morning. So I got home, took the medicine and after 2 or 3 hours...it went away....such a relief. I wasn't sure what was happening...because at first I didn't realize that I hadn't taken my medicine that morning.
Six Flags with Rowland:
I picked up Rowland at 8:30am. I asked him how he was doing and he said not the greatest. So of course I said why? He said that he realized something about himself today...that he didn't like. He said that he went to bed the night before telling himself that he was NOT going to smoke before he went to six flags to me...and when he woke up in the morning he told himself the same thing. He totally had his mind set on not smoking...but when he finished getting ready 10min early and was sitting around doing nothing...he could not resist the temptation to smoke...and ended up smoking a joint. He realized that he needs help. It was good being able to talk to him about it. Of course six flags was fun, I am not going to talk about the rides, only the conversations that took place. All day long he was checking out girls, and talking to me about it...which of course I didn't want to hear. That was weird, and disturbing at the same time. Good thing I was wearing very modest clothing...and so he wasn't talking to me about myself. =) We talked about religion...and how he believes in reincarnation...and that he thinks he was a bird in his previous life...because he constantly dreams that he can fly. That was an interesting conversation. He also talked to me about his mom being an alcoholic his entire life...and how she would pass out almost every night right infront of him. =( I hurt for him when he told me that. All day long we had a fun time though...interesting conversations took place...and I was SO glad he did not try to flirt with me. Thanks for your prayers on that. Anyways, we left around 5:30pm because we were both worn out. On our way home, I noticed that he was calling his buddies to get together and smoke that night. After he was done, I said "so where are we going to dinner?" (trying to keep him from smoking with his friends). He was all, I can't, I just planned to hang with my buddies. So I said, so you are telling me that you're going to reject my invetation to dinner just to go smoke with you friends? He knows he is addicted, and so he felt bad, but he turned dinner down. I hate it when substances take over peoples lives. I know he wanted to go to dinner with me badly...but his desire to smoke over powered him. So I took him home...we talked for a lil more and we said our goodbyes.
Nathan's phone call:
RIGHT after I was done with my bible study last night, Nathan called me back...which was around 8:30pm. I had called him earlier asking him to call me. I wanted him to call because I wanted to know his deep feelings about me going to six flags with Rowland. So we talked, and basically he said "I didn't understand how you could go to six flags with a jerk such as Rowland and not even consider inviting me instead." So basically I was right, it was a whole jealousy issue. Nathan does NOT like nor approve of Rowland at all. He basically doesn't want me to hang out with him. But after telling him my reasons for hanging out with Rowland, he understood and cooled down a bit.
Then our conversation switched to religion. He possed a lot of questions to me, and we discussed many issues...such as salvation. He told me that he does not want to participate in a religion that says who is and is not going to heaven. He feels that we have no right to determine that. He was also talking to me about how it is hard for him to believe that the universe was created in only 7 days. Basically his purpose was to tell me that he doesn't think that everything in the bible is true.
OBVIOUSLY I debated with him on those issues...and we had an amazing discussion. I was talking to him about...how in the world does he know what is true and what is false in the bible. How could he EVER feel secure in knowing that. If you think one bit of the bible is false, you have no security in believing the rest is true.
We also talked about our past relationship which we had together the summer of my Junior year. I don't know if you guys know, but we are almost always open with each other about our thoughts. SO we discussed our feelings...of why our relationship ended...and our thoughts about when we were together.
We talked about what it is like to marry a non-virgin when you yourself are a virgin...as well as what it is like to marry a virgin when you yourself are not. Basically we used my brother Joel and Melinda as an example...as well as Nathan himself. He talked about how AWFUL he feels about losing his virginity. It has caused so much guilt in his life. Also how the virgin wouldn't want the non-virgin to think of anyone else but themselves when they were having intercourse...and how uncomfortable it would be if the non-virgin did. We went into depth about our feelings with these thoughts...and it is TOO much to type. If you want to talk to me more about this...go right on ahead.
I asked him about any negative thoughts he has had towards me these months of not talking to me. He said other than this week about Rowland, he has had none. The reason why he didn't call me was because he was depressed. He said he didn't call anyone. All his desire was...was to be alone. He had nothing against me.
Towards the end of the conversation we talked about how I feel called to do missions...and how it is almost 100% official I will not be living in the US...and I will be serving the Lord full time. So we discussed how that affects our friendship/future. How he feels that doesn't stop us from anything...because he is willing to go anywhere to play his music...and who knows how he will change in the years to come...or even myself. So that was in detail as well.
When we got to talking about God again, Nathan told me how much he enjoys discussing biblical things with me. He says that he gets my point of view...and likes how I am open minded to listening to his. He says that my words are so encouraging to him...in that he wants to seek the Lord more and more.
There was so much more that was said. I mean, we talked for 4 hours straight. If you want to know more, you can call me. This is all my hands are allowing me to type. My fingers ache now.
OH I have to say one more thing. Yesterday around 4:45pm my headache stuff came back. I realized that I forgot to take my medicine that morning. So I got home, took the medicine and after 2 or 3 hours...it went away....such a relief. I wasn't sure what was happening...because at first I didn't realize that I hadn't taken my medicine that morning.