bitchin' update?
I don't want to be one of those people who don't update their ljs often. I think it's important to keep readers updated. But i my case I probably don't have any readers so i'm just complaining about things to myself. but if you don't like what i'm writing then i'd prefer if you'd stop reading right now. o my god! why i am i always like this, you defensive.
Things have been pretty weird lately, to say the least. I've been spending a lot of time online on lj, myspace, et cetera and i've realized that all of these people have lots of friends, experiences, memories. And what do i have? the countless amounts of domestic, indie and foreign movies that i've spent my friday and saturday nights watching. Oh, i almost forgot, there was that night where i went to my eighth grade graduation dance. that was something.
i just don't want to graduate my high school years and leave my youth with no memories. i want to rebel, break windows, smash things, get smashed, DO SOMETHING! 99% of the two and a half friends i have probably don't like me or talk about me in a bad way. Not spreading rumors, but saying things like, you know... she's so annoying, but in their own way. no one takes me seriously. they take me seriously when it comes to grades and bureaucratics. but no one gives a damn when i have feelings for someone or an opinion about something. it's not that i'm stupid, i guess it's because i'm different. i speak more languages than these people will probably ever hear. i have very democratic ideas. i'm for change and i don't care about the latest rap song, latest block buster movie, latest color/style of converse sneakers or the latest mp3 player produced by one of the world's leaders in imperialism/capitalism. half of the people in my school probably never heard of imperialism.
i guess i responded to my own cries about why i don't have any memories. i'm too negative. or is it them?
p.s. read The First And Last Freedom by Krishnamurti. The best philosophical book i've ever read.
Things have been pretty weird lately, to say the least. I've been spending a lot of time online on lj, myspace, et cetera and i've realized that all of these people have lots of friends, experiences, memories. And what do i have? the countless amounts of domestic, indie and foreign movies that i've spent my friday and saturday nights watching. Oh, i almost forgot, there was that night where i went to my eighth grade graduation dance. that was something.
i just don't want to graduate my high school years and leave my youth with no memories. i want to rebel, break windows, smash things, get smashed, DO SOMETHING! 99% of the two and a half friends i have probably don't like me or talk about me in a bad way. Not spreading rumors, but saying things like, you know... she's so annoying, but in their own way. no one takes me seriously. they take me seriously when it comes to grades and bureaucratics. but no one gives a damn when i have feelings for someone or an opinion about something. it's not that i'm stupid, i guess it's because i'm different. i speak more languages than these people will probably ever hear. i have very democratic ideas. i'm for change and i don't care about the latest rap song, latest block buster movie, latest color/style of converse sneakers or the latest mp3 player produced by one of the world's leaders in imperialism/capitalism. half of the people in my school probably never heard of imperialism.
i guess i responded to my own cries about why i don't have any memories. i'm too negative. or is it them?
p.s. read The First And Last Freedom by Krishnamurti. The best philosophical book i've ever read.