FIC: A Stitch In Time (Torchwood - Jack/Jack - FRM - 1/1)
Title: A Stitch In Time
Author: Sam
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairing: Jack/Jack
Rating: FRM - slash, angst
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Disclaimer: Not mine, no money made.
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Summary: Wisked back in time while investigating the reports of music coming from a deserted dance hall, Captain Jack Harkness meets the original Captain Jack Harkness in 1941, and it's love at first sight.
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A/N1: Set during the Captain Jack Harkness episode.
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A/N2: There should be two more stories in this series - There You'll Be and Right Here Waiting - though each can be read without the others. And yes, I was having a songfest day when the bunnies bit, how could you tell? :-)
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'Sweet Madness'...(1941 Jack pov)
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I have to admit I had not noticed him before I broke up the fight; too much attention spent making sure my men had everything they needed the night before a flight. True it was only a training flight, but it was equally true we were in a war where the next day was uncertain, and any future further than the next few moments unknown.
But when one of my men started a fight, swinging on someone whom I had originally thought a civilian, I immediately waded in, stepping between them and giving the man a moment to step back.
The moment our eyes met, there was…something. A jolt of recognition that shot through my body, leaving me breathless and lost in a warm wave of familiarity, even though I had never met this man before in my life. We spoke together, both laughing at the impulse and he graciously allowed me to go first.
When I introduced myself as Captain Jack Harkness, of the 133rd Squadron, I saw the first flicker of shock in the blue eyes, though he recovered quickly, this Captain James Harper, with a firm handshake and an open, easy smile that simply demanded to be answered.
I found myself looking for reasons to talk to him; I enjoyed his company, the way he looked at things. I told myself it was just that we were both Captains; that that sense of familiarity was simply because we did the same job, we had so much in common.
When Nancy showed up only to leave shortly after, and he told me to go after my girl - to take the chance and seize the night as if it might be my last - there was something in his eyes that told me he knew what he was talking about. So I did. I went after her and kissed her goodbye, feeling nothing more than a mild happiness to be found in the gentlemanly satisfaction one gets in seeing a woman who may as well be his sister safely on her way.
She said she loved me.
Only, as for me, there was no fire, no spark. None of the flutters that shake me when I talked to James Harper. But there’s something else; something in his eyes when ours meet. There’s something he’s not telling me, something to do with his woman companion, or that briefcase she carries. Something about me, or perhaps something about Captain Harper himself he’s not telling me and it started when he heard my name.
And…there’s something about the way he looks at me that makes me wonder what it might be like to have him voice those answers.
When the air raid begins I don’t have time to worry about the mystery that is the Captain, my only thoughts are to getting these people down into the cellar, as quickly as I can - only I look up to find James doing the exactly same thing, and between us we each take a side of the room and herd everyone downstairs. We stay on opposite sides of the basement, only our eyes continue to meet across the space. I can’t help but feel we’re alone, even in a room full of people, I‘m just not sure what that means. What I want it to mean.
I don't know what I was thinking when I crossed the room to answer his question of earlier. There are bombs going off all around us; of course I was scared. I could die tomorrow and somehow he knows this much better than I do.
The raid ends and the power comes back on, the manager urging us all back upstairs to dance, ending the clutches we have all been politely pretending we don’t see. After all, the world may end tomorrow, and we never know what chances we'll have to…
Suddenly I think I understand and it’s shock that has me searching James out of the crowd. He’s moved over by the stairs with Toshiko, overseeing the bandage Tim is wrapping over the cut in her hand and I’m suddenly glad he doesn’t see me staring.
He claimed that she was a code breaker, working for the government. What information might he have if that were the case? Was something horrible to happen tomorrow? Was that why he was urging me to make this the best night of my life? Because it might be?
I needed those answers. For my men. For me.
I needed to know what would happen tomorrow, but what I found more important, was the fact I needed to know what might happen tonight. What *was* behind this connection between us. And might it possibly mean what I thought - what I hoped it did?
It was not solely the bombs that scared me this night, but I had not gotten where I was by being a coward.
I find him sitting in an empty room all alone, just staring far, far ahead. I sit far too close. I touch his hand. He stills, and there is wonder in those blue eyes as his hand turns up, his fingers spread and threading through mine. I barely have time to feel the joy that simple confirmation brings when we’re interrupted.
We spring apart, guilty little boys caught doing something we shouldn’t, and when I offer to leave the room to the young couple seeking a private moment of their own, the hope on James’ face when he seconds my offer to find another space strengthens those flutters even as I deny them, saying the Captain has told me all I need to know. This - this can’t happen. It’s not who I am.
I am a pilot. A Captain. In a war we may well be losing. I can’t allow myself to become distracted by personal matters; I don‘t have that luxury. Especially now.
Wasn’t this the very reason I sent Nancy home? Was it? Or was it him?
The blue eyes staring back at me with hurt and disappointment before James allowed them to fall to the floor called me every kind of liar.
We stayed apart for the rest of the night. Him on his side of the room, me on mine. I can’t help searching him out. Needing to know he was still there. Here. That he hadn’t left with Toshiko back into a world I had no knowledge of.
He looks so sad. Like he’s lost something. And suddenly I can’t stand here any longer and deny what we both want. If it’s the ruin of my career, then so be it. If what I suspect is in my future truly comes to pass, then it won’t be a long one anyway. There is a reason the man known to me as Captain James Harper had been urging me to live all night. I think it’s because I won’t have a tomorrow; or not much of one.
I straighten and it’s perfectly clear he’s been watching me without seeming to because as soon as I start my stride in his direction, he stiffens a moment before a small smile graces his lips. He doesn’t look up as I arrive at his table; Toshiko does but I don’t look at her. I only have eyes for James.
I take his hand and again he wraps those fingers around mine. I pull him up out of his chair and he doesn’t resist, his eyes coming up to meet mine as we stop in the middle of the dance floor, his hands sliding over my jacket, the one of mine not holding his sliding to hold around his waist. The sudden silence is deafening but all it does is allow us to hear the music more clearly, the strains winding around us and sending our feet to move slowly with the tune, our hands clutching nervously as we dance.
He is so close, I can feel the heat of him through our clothes. The way we move together is so easy, so right and suddenly I don’t care what happens to me tomorrow, as long as I can have this tonight. His smile is so happy, so blinding, and I smile back because in this moment, I have everything…
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'Glorious Sadness' - Time Agent Jack's pov...
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I remember the way time slowed the moment our eyes met; taking on a weight it hasn't held in much too long. Urgent. Immediate. Timeless.
Important. Like this was meant to happen. Like one of the Doctor's fixed points that can't be changed.
I remember the way my breath caught as that weight barreled into me, taking me by surprise and making those blue, blue eyes the only thing I could see. So honest, so sincere. So open.
So kind.
Captain Jack Harkness was scheduled to die tomorrow, shot down in flames; a hero, covering his men, saving their lives, and my heart aches as I admit there's nothing I can do about it. Captain Jack Harkness dies in 1941. I take his name. I can't save him...
It doesn't matter; none of it does.
I can't save him.
The way it felt, just to talk to him; to see his smile. So hesitant, so searching; not knowing what it was he was looking for, or that he was looking for something at all. The earnest, honest care he took of his men, even on the night before a minor training flight.
The way it felt when he took my hand, a fragile, hesitant joy drowning out the million questions in his eyes. The way it felt to be caught up and held in his arms as he pulled me in to dance. Like I had finally come home.
My heart breaking, because...I can't save him.
But oh I want to. So much. More than anything, I want this.
The fingers that tangle into each other, their heat seeping into our shirts; skimming flat over jackets. That little gasp in my ear, fear and wonder as we pull close; breath warm and ghosting against the skin of my neck, his body firm and solid against mine as we move, slow and without regard to those around us. The hand that curves hesitantly over my shoulder, holding me lightly as we kiss, our lips clinging, falling apart only to cling again.
The tears that slip from my eyes.
I can't save him.
It was all about us; this moment, this one stitch in the fabric of time. No one else mattered; it was like they weren't even there, caught up in the electric pulse of the moment. Just the two of us; breath, skin, and reverent hands...
And a kiss that feels so right it was like an addiction; a physical ache to leave it, even if we were only coming up for air.
I can't...
I have duties...I should go back. To Torchwood, to...
I *can't* save him.... I *can't*...
Screw it.
How could I leave this? I can't. I won't.
Let the Rift close behind me; I'll catch up, I always do. For now, for tonight, I'm taking the second chance Time has given me while I have it safe, scared, and solid in my arms.
Let tomorrow take care of itself; for as long as it lasts, tonight is ours. And I'm not letting it go.
End