damn, homie.

[haute_hair_99]

ive made a decision. im going to be me again, do everything and anything to bring back the old leah, the one who would dive into the soccer goal and save everything and who would paint her face with ketchup just to make people laugh and the leah who wouldnt take shit from anyone, who would , at the ripe age of 8, beat up a 13 year old boy for making fun of her sister, jump on the bed screaming, drink just for the hell of it, sit on the back of a car, feet hanging out, screaming the words to If It Makes You Happy and not caring that people would laugh. where did it go? it seems that since the summer, since that one hour where my life changed forever, sadly, that one night where everything went wrong, and everything that followed, i was different. maybe it started before that. it was a long time coming. i dont know where it started. i mean, last year, there wasnt just one thing that got me like i am. it was all over a long period of time. i cant even decide what.... fuck ...........
ack. i cant write today.

new goals: by thanksgiving break

lose 8 lbs. yes. i am counting calories. im still carrying a little holiday weight.... ha .

write 15 more pages of a.i.w.

turn b- math grade into b or b+

stop spending money. im broke.

i love you,

he was crippled but only his body was cracked
its not simple, nor is it am easy matter to explain
lets leave it at that she says
and closes the holy book of lies
she covers her eyes
denying to herself what she thought happened.