It has mostly been me doing the real cleaning that has to be done. I know he does a job that is mainly cleaning a restaurant but the again so did I once upon a time.
What I resent is he does not care. I am sure the apartment will fall to pieces totally if I died due to lack of upkeep. Even when he had guests over, I did the before and after clean up. Even when I worked full or part time - I did most of the cleaning or planning for cleaning.
And I view it as he does not care about because he does not see how important it is to me. I try to cook better food, I try to clean and I try to maintain but it's all undone by the lack of appreciation on his side.
Aw Heather :( every time i read about the disproportionate-chore-doing thing on your LJ, i sympathize so much! Tony and I have also struggled with this. He insists that it is because "we have different standards of 'clean'" and i insist that it is because "Tony doesn't give a damn about household neatness". I still clean for him when i go to Kingston, because it saddens me to see visible dust/hair on his floor and 5 loads of laundry flowing from the basket (who can live like that?!) Perhaps I just have really high standards, but honestly, like you, I too worry that if I were to die he would probably be buried under his own filth
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What I resent is he does not care. I am sure the apartment will fall to pieces totally if I died due to lack of upkeep. Even when he had guests over, I did the before and after clean up. Even when I worked full or part time - I did most of the cleaning or planning for cleaning.
And I view it as he does not care about because he does not see how important it is to me. I try to cook better food, I try to clean and I try to maintain but it's all undone by the lack of appreciation on his side.
Thanks for listening though.
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