(no subject)
Man am I using this journal a lot lately. Well, today I had a very important realization.
I was bothered by two seperate things, but they bothered me for the same reason. 1) The fact that no one knows me that well, but I sputter and lie and change the subject anytime I'm asked about something about myself. 2) It's my birthday. I realized that these things bother me because I don't like to be analyzed, "figured out", or "seen through". My birthday always facilitates this, and that's why for the past several years I've dreaded my birthday while feigning happiness about it. And last night, I was throroughly analyzed by someone in particular, and then I felt like she knew too much about me. I could tell. And it bothered me.
This sucks. It's not easy to not be alone when no knows you really well. But I can't stand it.
Oh, what (or who? ;) )I could be doing this evening that I'm not...
I was bothered by two seperate things, but they bothered me for the same reason. 1) The fact that no one knows me that well, but I sputter and lie and change the subject anytime I'm asked about something about myself. 2) It's my birthday. I realized that these things bother me because I don't like to be analyzed, "figured out", or "seen through". My birthday always facilitates this, and that's why for the past several years I've dreaded my birthday while feigning happiness about it. And last night, I was throroughly analyzed by someone in particular, and then I felt like she knew too much about me. I could tell. And it bothered me.
This sucks. It's not easy to not be alone when no knows you really well. But I can't stand it.
Oh, what (or who? ;) )I could be doing this evening that I'm not...