I'm not overreacting to anything. This is my reacting from things building up constantly. Things bother me, I just keep it in so that shit like this doesn't happen, so that I don't end up with people mad at me.
You've been one of the many people to tell me that if something's bothering me than I should let it out because then it wont explode. I let it out... It exploded anyway.
I'm not asking for you to clincically diognose me or ANYTHING like that...I'm just scared as fuck and the one person that I feel most comfortable talking to about things like this is the one that's pissed at me for voicing how I feel.
Yes you listened to me on the phone but what you put in that LJ entry and what you said on the phone were basically two different things. One was "Nothing's changed...I'm still here..." making me think that everything was okay again and it would be happy and amazing because I finally did what everyone was telling me to do (voice how I felt) and nothing bad came of it. Then the other was just ramming on me. That's exactly what I need...My best friend telling me how fucking pathetic that I am when you know how much my self-esteem sucks.
I don't know what to think right now. My brain's going on in about 15 different directions. All I know is that my best friend's pissed at me for doing the exact thing that she'd been telling me to do the entire time, and that was to tell people when they're doing something that's bothering me and to voice how I feel so that it wouldn't bottle up in me and explode later.
This is my reacting from things building up constantly. Things bother me, I just keep it in so that shit like this doesn't happen, so that I don't end up with people mad at me.
You've been one of the many people to tell me that if something's bothering me than I should let it out because then it wont explode.
I let it out...
It exploded anyway.
I'm not asking for you to clincically diognose me or ANYTHING like that...I'm just scared as fuck and the one person that I feel most comfortable talking to about things like this is the one that's pissed at me for voicing how I feel.
Yes you listened to me on the phone but what you put in that LJ entry and what you said on the phone were basically two different things. One was "Nothing's changed...I'm still here..." making me think that everything was okay again and it would be happy and amazing because I finally did what everyone was telling me to do (voice how I felt) and nothing bad came of it. Then the other was just ramming on me. That's exactly what I need...My best friend telling me how fucking pathetic that I am when you know how much my self-esteem sucks.
I don't know what to think right now. My brain's going on in about 15 different directions. All I know is that my best friend's pissed at me for doing the exact thing that she'd been telling me to do the entire time, and that was to tell people when they're doing something that's bothering me and to voice how I feel so that it wouldn't bottle up in me and explode later.
Reply
Leave a comment