~o~ Me, From a Christian Priest's Point of View ~o~
lol, I thought this was a bit funny, and I decided to post it. I found this list, which was composed by a Christian Priest, who feels my mates and I worship the devil. I just thought it was interesting how his point of view was so incredibly different and askew from what truly happened.
1) The animal sacrifice of a cat.
... Crookshanks? Ron is pretty cruel sometimes, but he wouldn't go as far as sacrificing him. He knows Hermione would sacrifice him right after, lol. I do believe he means Miss Norris though, and ... the last time I checked, she was still alive and irritating as ever.
2) Non-magicians like you and I (Muggles) are portrayed as dull, boring, cruel or useless.
Basically the only Muggles really referred to in the books, (as far as I know) are my Aunt, Uncle and cousin. And uh ... I hate to break it to you, but they are dull, boring, cruel and useless. He's the one who's stereotyping Muggles, not me, or Miss Rowling.
3) Power is the ultimate moral choice, irrespective of good or evil.
Oh yeah, I clearly recall Dumbledore saying that. Actually, I think he said basically the opposite. It's Voldemort who believes power is all, Dumbledore is all about the choices you make. Has this man even read the books?
4) Blood sacrifices.
Oh please. When is he going to get to the part where I eat the kittens and kick old women?
5) Cutting off the hand of a living person for a ritual.
He cut off his own bloody hand. I didn't see it ... I shut my eyes just before he did it, but I heard him scream ... Anyhow, he took part in that ritual all on his own. I'm all for Wormtail going to hell if cutting off your own hand is evil.
6) Boiling a baby or fetus alive in a cauldron.
... What book was this man reading?
7) Possible demon possession.
Nah, Malfoy's always that way.
8) Werewolves & vampires.
I haven't read the bible myself, but could one of you out there who has please quote where it says werewolves and vampires are all automatically sent to hell?
9) Bringing a evil wizard back from the dead through the shedding of blood.
Was this the 11th commandment? Thou shalt not bring back an evil wizard by shedding thousows own blood ye. Yes, that did happen, and yes, it did hurt, but still, what does it have to do with anything?
10) Astral project or travel.
Apparation? So everyone passed 7th year is basically doomed - sorry for your luck!
11) Casting spells and levitation.
Sweet Jesus - I've made a feather fly! I'm meeelting - I'm meeelting.
12) Being able to shape-shift into an animal.
I know thou shalt not steal thou neighbours ox, but I never knew I wasn't allowed to change into one. *snaps fingers* Damn, there goes that party trick.
13) Crystal gazing or divination.
Ha! The next time I have divination I'll tell Trelawny I can't participate because it's against religious purposes.
14) A hero (Harry) who tells lies, steals, breaks the rules, and cheats by copying another student’s homework, (cheating is OK in wizard ethics).
I do not lie. (Yes, that was a lie). But what have I stolen? I mean, I'm sure I've borrowed things, but ... stealing? I steal when it's necessary, like for the Polyjuice Potion - and hey, that was Hermione! Rules are made to be broken, and who doesn't cheat by copying? And I've never copied word for word ... LOL! I'll just tell Professor McGonagall it's okay for me to cheat because it's okay in her ethics. Now it all makes sense. Those anti-cheating quills must just be for fun.
15) Approval of astrology.
Didn't the wise men follow a star?
16) Being taught that people can exist without their souls.
Come on now. Malfoy isn't that bad - Oh! Oh you mean the Dementors?
17) Communication with the dead, dead souls living within us.
So I'm going to hell because I spoke to my Mum and Dad while they helped me defeat Voldemort? Yes, I see the logic.
18) Harry takes mood/mind-altering drugs.
LOL! Yeah man, you should see the colours my hand turns when I wave it in front of my face. Wow ... Ooooh.
19) Use of the "Hand of Glory," a grisly occult artefact that is the severed hand of a hanged murderer. Its fingers are lit and burned as candles. The hand is placed in a house to make everyone in the house fall into a spell.
I think this guy is the one taking the mind altering drugs.
20) Use of magic charms.
It isn't called Hogwarts School of Science and Literature.
21) Belief that death is just the "next great adventure" (which might be true if you were a Christian, but no one in these books is a professing Christian.) For non-Christians like Harry, death is a one-way ticket to hell!
Well, if this guy has a one way to heaven, I think I'd prefer the other train anyways ...
I also just wanted to add that this was in no way meant to offend anybody here who might be religious. I respect each and every religion the world has to offer, and I do believe that they all have their pros and cons, but, I do despise it when people feel the need to shoves their beliefs in others faces. I do hope you all understand, I wasn't trying to stir up any controversy, just poke some fun at this bloke, because it was only too easy.
1) The animal sacrifice of a cat.
... Crookshanks? Ron is pretty cruel sometimes, but he wouldn't go as far as sacrificing him. He knows Hermione would sacrifice him right after, lol. I do believe he means Miss Norris though, and ... the last time I checked, she was still alive and irritating as ever.
2) Non-magicians like you and I (Muggles) are portrayed as dull, boring, cruel or useless.
Basically the only Muggles really referred to in the books, (as far as I know) are my Aunt, Uncle and cousin. And uh ... I hate to break it to you, but they are dull, boring, cruel and useless. He's the one who's stereotyping Muggles, not me, or Miss Rowling.
3) Power is the ultimate moral choice, irrespective of good or evil.
Oh yeah, I clearly recall Dumbledore saying that. Actually, I think he said basically the opposite. It's Voldemort who believes power is all, Dumbledore is all about the choices you make. Has this man even read the books?
4) Blood sacrifices.
Oh please. When is he going to get to the part where I eat the kittens and kick old women?
5) Cutting off the hand of a living person for a ritual.
He cut off his own bloody hand. I didn't see it ... I shut my eyes just before he did it, but I heard him scream ... Anyhow, he took part in that ritual all on his own. I'm all for Wormtail going to hell if cutting off your own hand is evil.
6) Boiling a baby or fetus alive in a cauldron.
... What book was this man reading?
7) Possible demon possession.
Nah, Malfoy's always that way.
8) Werewolves & vampires.
I haven't read the bible myself, but could one of you out there who has please quote where it says werewolves and vampires are all automatically sent to hell?
9) Bringing a evil wizard back from the dead through the shedding of blood.
Was this the 11th commandment? Thou shalt not bring back an evil wizard by shedding thousows own blood ye. Yes, that did happen, and yes, it did hurt, but still, what does it have to do with anything?
10) Astral project or travel.
Apparation? So everyone passed 7th year is basically doomed - sorry for your luck!
11) Casting spells and levitation.
Sweet Jesus - I've made a feather fly! I'm meeelting - I'm meeelting.
12) Being able to shape-shift into an animal.
I know thou shalt not steal thou neighbours ox, but I never knew I wasn't allowed to change into one. *snaps fingers* Damn, there goes that party trick.
13) Crystal gazing or divination.
Ha! The next time I have divination I'll tell Trelawny I can't participate because it's against religious purposes.
14) A hero (Harry) who tells lies, steals, breaks the rules, and cheats by copying another student’s homework, (cheating is OK in wizard ethics).
I do not lie. (Yes, that was a lie). But what have I stolen? I mean, I'm sure I've borrowed things, but ... stealing? I steal when it's necessary, like for the Polyjuice Potion - and hey, that was Hermione! Rules are made to be broken, and who doesn't cheat by copying? And I've never copied word for word ... LOL! I'll just tell Professor McGonagall it's okay for me to cheat because it's okay in her ethics. Now it all makes sense. Those anti-cheating quills must just be for fun.
15) Approval of astrology.
Didn't the wise men follow a star?
16) Being taught that people can exist without their souls.
Come on now. Malfoy isn't that bad - Oh! Oh you mean the Dementors?
17) Communication with the dead, dead souls living within us.
So I'm going to hell because I spoke to my Mum and Dad while they helped me defeat Voldemort? Yes, I see the logic.
18) Harry takes mood/mind-altering drugs.
LOL! Yeah man, you should see the colours my hand turns when I wave it in front of my face. Wow ... Ooooh.
19) Use of the "Hand of Glory," a grisly occult artefact that is the severed hand of a hanged murderer. Its fingers are lit and burned as candles. The hand is placed in a house to make everyone in the house fall into a spell.
I think this guy is the one taking the mind altering drugs.
20) Use of magic charms.
It isn't called Hogwarts School of Science and Literature.
21) Belief that death is just the "next great adventure" (which might be true if you were a Christian, but no one in these books is a professing Christian.) For non-Christians like Harry, death is a one-way ticket to hell!
Well, if this guy has a one way to heaven, I think I'd prefer the other train anyways ...
I also just wanted to add that this was in no way meant to offend anybody here who might be religious. I respect each and every religion the world has to offer, and I do believe that they all have their pros and cons, but, I do despise it when people feel the need to shoves their beliefs in others faces. I do hope you all understand, I wasn't trying to stir up any controversy, just poke some fun at this bloke, because it was only too easy.