(no subject)
Hmmmmm....
Im really tired..
Not in the physical way but in just about every other. Mentally, spiritually(Yes I am spirituall in my own way) Ive just put so much effort into being completely oblivious to what is around me that Im exhausted. I need to go someplace wwith someone. anything to get me back into my gleeful stupor, my big facade that I play every day. Im sitting in this room that is so empty. Theres nothing on the walls no rug, fan, windows... Just this computer, and me. And you know what? Im empty too. I have nothing in me to grab onto and pull myself up. No memories,ideas,feelings or anything. Pedro is my best friend but now he realy isnt anymore. He has his own life and schedual. Witch just doesnt involve me. And the sad thing is that I really have no beef with it. I really dont. Pedro has Jeannie and jeannie has pedro so..... What else do they need? Just each other I think. I just accept it now. I guess adam is my best friend now. And you know what? Thats really sad. Adam is adam. Adam is a chunky kid that really hasnt hit emotional puberty in a sense. I have noone to talk to anymore. But hey what about shannon? I like shannon. But her and I are well, not exactly on a high emotionall basis. I really wish that would be. I hope we fall in love or something akin to it. ( Shannon if your reading this Im really embaressed but hey I like to speak my mind) I think your probably the sexiest person alive. I feel so hopeless though. I wish I could just hold you right now cause I sure as hell need to.
Im really tired..
Not in the physical way but in just about every other. Mentally, spiritually(Yes I am spirituall in my own way) Ive just put so much effort into being completely oblivious to what is around me that Im exhausted. I need to go someplace wwith someone. anything to get me back into my gleeful stupor, my big facade that I play every day. Im sitting in this room that is so empty. Theres nothing on the walls no rug, fan, windows... Just this computer, and me. And you know what? Im empty too. I have nothing in me to grab onto and pull myself up. No memories,ideas,feelings or anything. Pedro is my best friend but now he realy isnt anymore. He has his own life and schedual. Witch just doesnt involve me. And the sad thing is that I really have no beef with it. I really dont. Pedro has Jeannie and jeannie has pedro so..... What else do they need? Just each other I think. I just accept it now. I guess adam is my best friend now. And you know what? Thats really sad. Adam is adam. Adam is a chunky kid that really hasnt hit emotional puberty in a sense. I have noone to talk to anymore. But hey what about shannon? I like shannon. But her and I are well, not exactly on a high emotionall basis. I really wish that would be. I hope we fall in love or something akin to it. ( Shannon if your reading this Im really embaressed but hey I like to speak my mind) I think your probably the sexiest person alive. I feel so hopeless though. I wish I could just hold you right now cause I sure as hell need to.