This where you want-a be when Jeez comes back, pickin on lil Joe Dirt?
A few days ago, Phil Rose leaned over the counter, asked me for a "silly drink" and wanted me to tell him about "hazing."
I guess Phil feels hazed.
Then Allie directed me to some stuff I wrote about our social dynamic and I got to wondering if that's really what it is. It's been percolating in my scrambly brains since then.
Then - then! Alex got his latest Netflix order: Season One of Jericho. Oh god. The acting and writing is markedly mediocre but the premise scares the hell out of me; the end of modern society as we know it and the ensuing mob mentality amongst its survivors. My heart pounds in every episode. (Lest I get sidetracked even more, do you want to know what pisses me off? They have a big PARTY to cook all the spoiling meat. I just ..... guh. Why didn't they dry it, brine it, pot it? Anyway. I'm only on episode three so don't wreck the story for me.) I think I have a new obsession TV show now. Really, there's nothing I love more than a good apocalypse.
But it occurs to me now that this may be an exaggerated explanation for the often bizarre dynamics of my social network. It's all about your face. Not the face you wear to the coffee shop, oh no. Your real face. Your Jericho face. The face you'll wear when Jeez comes back.
So I read about hazing after the show ended this morning, which, is some pretty distasteful stuff. I will fully admit to an immature sense of humor that probably hasn't evolved very far past middle school but a Glenbrook North High School, we're not. Glenbrook North HS is where "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" was filmed. It is also supposedly the premise for "The Breakfast Club." I didn't know either of those things (and since I read it on Wikipedia, who knows how true it is) but what I really didn't know was that it was also the actual site of a heinous hazing involving girl's football, paintball guns, piss, shit, stitches and 15 convictions for assault and battery.
This might be a good time to disclose that I have witnessed friends and loved ones shoot eachother with airguns, cause each other stitches, and piss in the yard. Fortunately, neither shit nor football has ever surfaced so perhaps that is my only saving grace.
However, I still contend that we ain't no Glenbrook North High School. That kind of thing makes me feel very gross and yucky.
Our particular brand of assery is more about deconstructing the public face, which is easy to lose sight of when everybody is acting like a Donkey Kong. Donkey Kong is a euphemism for a major social misstep, by the way. Once I Donkey Konged Katy. Alex rather infamously Donkey Konged (how come none of you caught my typo "donkey donged"!?!?!) Jonathan. I won't expose anyone else for theirs, they can disclose if they want to!
Even Michael, I fear, has lost sight of the value of what I am calling the "true face," as opposed to the "public face" or the "private face." The True Face is your Jericho face. The face you are left with when resources normally devoted to keeping up appearances are consumed with other diversions such as food/shelter/water or trying to remain upright while borracho. This is the face that matters when a group is evaluating the potential of a new member. This is the face that belies the grist of your character and determines, ultimately, whether I would invite you into my bomb shelter when the fit hits the shan. If I had a bomb shelter, that is.
Last night Michael lamented some of the stories we have about him, even though immediately after mentioning this we both relayed some of our greatest hits to a classmate with glee. Michael regrets the stories he has created, even though without them, we would never be as close as we are. They embarass him, he said, but that was his public face speaking. Within a compassionate group (which I believe my group to be, no matter how beshitted our "public face"), your true face tells us who you are.
Michael, this is you: devoted, loyal, sexual, polite, sentimental, fierce, strong, educated and analytical. You may join me in my bomb shelter now, as I find these attributes to be satisfactory criteria in order to reconstruct society after the Armageddon.
It's not just Michael that undergoes this process, it's merely poor Michael who happened to mention this to me while I was ruminating on the topic of "hazing." I can analyze other people too and enlist their post-end of days values too.
I realize I've just shared a piece of my internal crazy with you, but my infatuation with the end of the world is a facet of my true face, believe it or not. I'm always working on Plan B.
Ok, I'll make it a little more sane for you. The way a person's true face is evaluated determines whether that person will be stalwart in a pinch. Will he help you move? Will he bring you groceries when you're broke? Will he bring you wine and chocolate when things go wrong? Will he take care of you when you must take care of others instead? Can you trust him with a secret? Did he trust you enough to reveal his true face?
Here are six domains of the face (which must be factual since I read it on Wikipedia):
Autonomy-represents our need for others to acknowledge our independence, self-sufficiency, privacy, boundary, nonimposition, control issues, and our consideration of other’s autonomy face needs
Inclusion-our need to be recognized as worthy companions, likeable, agreeable, pleasant, friendly, cooperative
Status-need for others to admire our tangible and intangible assets or resources: appearance, attractiveness, reputation, position, power, and material worth
Reliability-need for others to realize that we are trustworthy, dependable, reliable, loyal, and consistent in words and actions
Competence-need for others to recognize our qualities or social abilities such as intelligence, skills, expertise, leadership, team-building, networking, conflict mediation, facework, and problem-solving skills
Moral-need for others to respect our sense of integrity, dignity, honor, propriety, and morality
I guess Phil feels hazed.
Then Allie directed me to some stuff I wrote about our social dynamic and I got to wondering if that's really what it is. It's been percolating in my scrambly brains since then.
Then - then! Alex got his latest Netflix order: Season One of Jericho. Oh god. The acting and writing is markedly mediocre but the premise scares the hell out of me; the end of modern society as we know it and the ensuing mob mentality amongst its survivors. My heart pounds in every episode. (Lest I get sidetracked even more, do you want to know what pisses me off? They have a big PARTY to cook all the spoiling meat. I just ..... guh. Why didn't they dry it, brine it, pot it? Anyway. I'm only on episode three so don't wreck the story for me.) I think I have a new obsession TV show now. Really, there's nothing I love more than a good apocalypse.
But it occurs to me now that this may be an exaggerated explanation for the often bizarre dynamics of my social network. It's all about your face. Not the face you wear to the coffee shop, oh no. Your real face. Your Jericho face. The face you'll wear when Jeez comes back.
So I read about hazing after the show ended this morning, which, is some pretty distasteful stuff. I will fully admit to an immature sense of humor that probably hasn't evolved very far past middle school but a Glenbrook North High School, we're not. Glenbrook North HS is where "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" was filmed. It is also supposedly the premise for "The Breakfast Club." I didn't know either of those things (and since I read it on Wikipedia, who knows how true it is) but what I really didn't know was that it was also the actual site of a heinous hazing involving girl's football, paintball guns, piss, shit, stitches and 15 convictions for assault and battery.
This might be a good time to disclose that I have witnessed friends and loved ones shoot eachother with airguns, cause each other stitches, and piss in the yard. Fortunately, neither shit nor football has ever surfaced so perhaps that is my only saving grace.
However, I still contend that we ain't no Glenbrook North High School. That kind of thing makes me feel very gross and yucky.
Our particular brand of assery is more about deconstructing the public face, which is easy to lose sight of when everybody is acting like a Donkey Kong. Donkey Kong is a euphemism for a major social misstep, by the way. Once I Donkey Konged Katy. Alex rather infamously Donkey Konged (how come none of you caught my typo "donkey donged"!?!?!) Jonathan. I won't expose anyone else for theirs, they can disclose if they want to!
Even Michael, I fear, has lost sight of the value of what I am calling the "true face," as opposed to the "public face" or the "private face." The True Face is your Jericho face. The face you are left with when resources normally devoted to keeping up appearances are consumed with other diversions such as food/shelter/water or trying to remain upright while borracho. This is the face that matters when a group is evaluating the potential of a new member. This is the face that belies the grist of your character and determines, ultimately, whether I would invite you into my bomb shelter when the fit hits the shan. If I had a bomb shelter, that is.
Last night Michael lamented some of the stories we have about him, even though immediately after mentioning this we both relayed some of our greatest hits to a classmate with glee. Michael regrets the stories he has created, even though without them, we would never be as close as we are. They embarass him, he said, but that was his public face speaking. Within a compassionate group (which I believe my group to be, no matter how beshitted our "public face"), your true face tells us who you are.
Michael, this is you: devoted, loyal, sexual, polite, sentimental, fierce, strong, educated and analytical. You may join me in my bomb shelter now, as I find these attributes to be satisfactory criteria in order to reconstruct society after the Armageddon.
It's not just Michael that undergoes this process, it's merely poor Michael who happened to mention this to me while I was ruminating on the topic of "hazing." I can analyze other people too and enlist their post-end of days values too.
I realize I've just shared a piece of my internal crazy with you, but my infatuation with the end of the world is a facet of my true face, believe it or not. I'm always working on Plan B.
Ok, I'll make it a little more sane for you. The way a person's true face is evaluated determines whether that person will be stalwart in a pinch. Will he help you move? Will he bring you groceries when you're broke? Will he bring you wine and chocolate when things go wrong? Will he take care of you when you must take care of others instead? Can you trust him with a secret? Did he trust you enough to reveal his true face?
Here are six domains of the face (which must be factual since I read it on Wikipedia):
Autonomy-represents our need for others to acknowledge our independence, self-sufficiency, privacy, boundary, nonimposition, control issues, and our consideration of other’s autonomy face needs
Inclusion-our need to be recognized as worthy companions, likeable, agreeable, pleasant, friendly, cooperative
Status-need for others to admire our tangible and intangible assets or resources: appearance, attractiveness, reputation, position, power, and material worth
Reliability-need for others to realize that we are trustworthy, dependable, reliable, loyal, and consistent in words and actions
Competence-need for others to recognize our qualities or social abilities such as intelligence, skills, expertise, leadership, team-building, networking, conflict mediation, facework, and problem-solving skills
Moral-need for others to respect our sense of integrity, dignity, honor, propriety, and morality