Existential
I am wondering what the point of any of my desires or goals would actually be. Let's say I somehow found passionate soul mate(s), wealth, maybe had kids, had some kind of great career, whatever. And then... so fucking what? What's the point?
Two things come to mind when I review my musings: am I not a little old for these kinds of thoughts? And didn't I last have these thoughts when I was depressed almost beyond help? Then I wonder if actually it's some kind of enlightenment: these things are not necessarily all that worthy anyway?
Since I am here... for however long that ends up being, I have to figure out some way to cope with it. I don't feel suicidal or anything, and don't have death ideation, I'm just wondering what the point is and if there is none, what do I do with all this time?
Two things come to mind when I review my musings: am I not a little old for these kinds of thoughts? And didn't I last have these thoughts when I was depressed almost beyond help? Then I wonder if actually it's some kind of enlightenment: these things are not necessarily all that worthy anyway?
Since I am here... for however long that ends up being, I have to figure out some way to cope with it. I don't feel suicidal or anything, and don't have death ideation, I'm just wondering what the point is and if there is none, what do I do with all this time?