*sigh*
I'm doing so well writing in my normal journal that I thought maybe I would be able to start this up again. I don't even know if anyone reads it but I think I'll try anyways.
A lot has changed over the past year. I met a girl, cheated on a girl, on the verge of losing said girl and for the first time in my life I can look back and see what I did wrong and what I need to work on. Some say its because I was/am faced with such a huge emotional loss because my actions and what I have been doing actually effect someone that I really loved... and I'm not talking that "I love you" after every phone call bullshit. I'm talking the real thing.
How do I know its the real thing you ask? Well let me put it this way. Before this girl and this situation I would always say "How do I even know what love is? have I ever been in love? love just seems to not be enough". Well I now know what love is. Its nothing I can explain fully but I can give details and reasons why I know it is love. If you really want to know just ask me but that isn't the point of this entry.
So now I have to face the consequences of my actions. I haven't lost the girl yet but things are hanging on by a thread. Part of me thinks that this has caused her so much pain and continues to do so, so it seems that it would be best for her to not have to deal with this. But the other part is selfish and doesn't want to lose this girl. What to do, what to do...
One reason I'll leave with you why I know I love her. Every other girl I've dated I have thought "You know this girl has these wonderful qualities but I bet I can find someone with those but doesn't have her negative ones." You know you are in love when your significant others negative qualities are just an extra thing that makes them who they are and you wouldn't change it for the world.
On a happier note, I cleaned the shit out of the bathroom... whoa... when I type that is sounds soooo wrong. How about this. "I went to town on the bathroom" maybe that's better. anyways it sparkles. I'm proud
I also got a job today... that's not very exciting but I need the $
Does anyone read this? would it be a good place to test out lyrics and see what people think? Feedback???!!!
A lot has changed over the past year. I met a girl, cheated on a girl, on the verge of losing said girl and for the first time in my life I can look back and see what I did wrong and what I need to work on. Some say its because I was/am faced with such a huge emotional loss because my actions and what I have been doing actually effect someone that I really loved... and I'm not talking that "I love you" after every phone call bullshit. I'm talking the real thing.
How do I know its the real thing you ask? Well let me put it this way. Before this girl and this situation I would always say "How do I even know what love is? have I ever been in love? love just seems to not be enough". Well I now know what love is. Its nothing I can explain fully but I can give details and reasons why I know it is love. If you really want to know just ask me but that isn't the point of this entry.
So now I have to face the consequences of my actions. I haven't lost the girl yet but things are hanging on by a thread. Part of me thinks that this has caused her so much pain and continues to do so, so it seems that it would be best for her to not have to deal with this. But the other part is selfish and doesn't want to lose this girl. What to do, what to do...
One reason I'll leave with you why I know I love her. Every other girl I've dated I have thought "You know this girl has these wonderful qualities but I bet I can find someone with those but doesn't have her negative ones." You know you are in love when your significant others negative qualities are just an extra thing that makes them who they are and you wouldn't change it for the world.
On a happier note, I cleaned the shit out of the bathroom... whoa... when I type that is sounds soooo wrong. How about this. "I went to town on the bathroom" maybe that's better. anyways it sparkles. I'm proud
I also got a job today... that's not very exciting but I need the $
Does anyone read this? would it be a good place to test out lyrics and see what people think? Feedback???!!!