AND WE'LL DRIP, DRIP AWAY~...
Everything's coming up ~~RABBITS~~... and sleep-deprivation. All the time.
Everyone is going to laugh at me when I tell them this, but I used to have a Thing about rabbits. I have had NIGHTMARE AFTER NIGHTMARE involving the things, sometimes not even directly. I DON'T KNOW IF THERE'S SYMBOLISM IN THAT!! And this was BEFORE I saw "Rabbits" by David Lynch, too. 3: I don't resent them for it, anymore, but... my god.
UH, ANYWAY, EVERYONE IS ANSWERING THIS STUPID QUESTION.
AND LISTENING TO ANIMAL COLLECTIVE WHILE THEY DO IT.
SOOOOO I'LL JUST SAY...
I'M A ~~RAM/GOAT/SHEEP~~!! IN THE CHINESE ZODIAC.
NO ONE CAN SETTLE ON A NAME FOR ME. ;D uh
a METAL RAM/GOAT/SHEEP specifically.
METAL SHEEP - 1871, 1931, 1991~!
The Metal Sheep will have great faith in himself and know the value of his talents. He can camouflage his high degree of sensitivity by putting up a brave front, although actually he has a very vulnerable ego and is easily offended by offhand remarks.
Metal reinforces his flowing artistic tastes and he will be inspired to search continuously for beauty in all forms. His home could be a master piece of interior decoration, as he is most concerned about harmony and balance in his daily life. Leaving a familiar environment can be traumatic for him; he will find it hard to adjust to change.
This type of Sheep will also aspire to security in both his domestic and financial life. His services won't come cheap, although he is not averse to handing out free meal tickets now and then.
His social activities will be limited to those people he cherishes or those who could be of use to his career. The uninitiated will have to wait for him to warm up to their advances.
Beneath his calm and helpful exterior, the Metal Sheep has unstable emotions that he finds hard to control. As a result, he can be possessive, jealous and overprotective of his loved ones. He should allow people about him more freedom. Expecting everyone to be at his beck and call will only cause resentment, as well as resistance to the invaluable contributions he could make.
...
BUT!! I WAS ~~SUPPOSED~~ TO BE A WATER MONKEY.
So do with that what you will, I suppose~! I don't think it represents my animal spirit ~~at all,~~ mainly because... ;D my animal spirit is usually a dolphin, and ~~sometimes~~ an otter!! And the dolphin has been my--oh my god, paranoia--my... animal spirit since I was a little kid, so there you have it. ;D ;D ;D I will even use a dolphin icon just to HAMMER THAT POINT HOME. LMFAO.
BUT THERE NOW I'VE DONE IT. LIKE THE SHEEP I AM.
hum.
I've been sick for a good long while, but I think I got over the worst of it!! Unfortunately, this means I have nothing all that ~~interesting~~ to update with right now. I will say that I have pretty godawful FEVER DREAMS!! ...well, okay, I either have really weird and erotic dreams or terrible, nonsensical nightmares when I'm sick. ...I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING, OKAY. LMFAO.
but these last few nights... huh. I don't remember my dream last night, but in my dream before THAT, I was pulling off all of my fingernails. ALL THE WAY. I pulled the first one off by accident, stared at it and the blood that resulted, laughed, and just kept GOING until I was in all this pain and there was all this blood and I was just LAUGHING. I ... DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. LMFAO. *SOBS TO WIND CHIMES* but i will never take my fingernails for-granted again. ...and then in the dream I had before THAT, this lady was ... making a coffin for her baby in front of me. Because her baby was ~~terminally ill~~ and going to die soon.
...and I JUST LAUGHED AT HER. LMFAO AND THE BABY. D8
and then I turned into a little kid again for some reason, and I was playing pretend with sibling. 8D So I guess my subconscious wanted to get me to empathize with the baby?? except then I just ignored the baby and ran around shouting things about superheroes, so.
THE POINT IS, EVEN THOUGH THEY SEEM VAGUE (THEY WERE, BTW), BOTH NIGHTMARES WERE VERY FEVERISH AND UNPLEASANT. I think I might have dreamed about a Cloverfield/Godzillalike monster at one point, too, and I just ran around talking about how ~~cool~~ it was while everyone else freaked out. I feel like I should note that this is a far cry from the USUAL path my dreams take, with me being the only one aware of the disaster and everyone else insisting that it's FINE!! to the point of blind stupidity.
huhhklg;;; i think i will have to analyze all this. but maybe not?? the result of high, high temperatures and low spirits. ANYWAY, I'M BETTER NOW. MOSTLY. VERY NAUSEOUS, BUT I'M GETTING OVER THAT SHH.
what else, what else.
OH!! 8D My violin lessons are the best ever. I might as well THROW THAT OUT THERE. I have this very intimate, very passionate, very ~~odd~~ relationship with the violin. I know she is a lady, but I don't know her name. :3 But she has the curves that ladies do. We're wary of each other, still; we don't have one another figured out quite yet, and I'm not QUITE in love with her... it's more like lust. ;D Sometimes she RESISTS me and my fingering (LAWL), sometimes she gives in and we make magic happen, either way it's a very powerful and empowering thing! To finally play the instrument that I've felt a connection to for so long~!
My violin TEACHER is a very groovy fellow, too. ;3 I call him Jim the Violinist. He has an adventurer's beard and a violinist's fingers~! And he BELIEVES IN ME so much. HE KNOWS WHAT I AM FEELING ABOUT MUSIC BEFORE I TELL HIM. D8 And this last time, he called me his HERO!! And he's very talkative, very passionate about what he does, very enthusiastic to see what I can do~! He told me that this wasn't just a passing fancy, that playing the violin was a LIFESTYLE, and I think it really is~!! I think it's a big part of my ~~DESTINY,~~ or whatsit. And we're getting RESULTS, too. My feet are getting better at tapping along to the beat (more related to physical, CP reasons than my ability to keep a rhythm or get a rhythm going ;3), it's getting easier and easier to SLIP INTO that violin-playing... uh, STANCE!!
AND I CAN ALREADY PLAY "TWINKLE, TWINKLE LITTLE STAR" AND "MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB." 8D *PROUD* Not perfectly, and I feel bad for my family because they have to listen to me practice, but
OH I DON'T KNOW!! THIS ALL FEELS LIKE SUCH A PERFECT FIT FOR ME.
unfortunately, I was so sick that I could barely drag myself out of bed, much less hold the violin up, this last time. so I HAD TO CANCEL. and i was angry at myself the whole day. LMFAO. Buuuuut we soldier on, I guess, and I think he was very understanding~!
OH AND I GOT ERICC INTO BLACK MOTH SUPER RAINBOW. I MEAN, ~~REALLY~~ INTO THEM. WE ARE BOTH COMPLETE FANBOYS NOW AND MY LIFE IS NEARLY COMPLETE. LMFAO. His reaction to their music was ~~PERFECT~~!! I mean, we were up at eight AM and entirely sleep-deprived out of our minds, but I shoved "Forever Heavy" in his face, and he smiled SO WIDELY and said, "...I'VE BEEN WAITING TO HEAR THIS ~~MY WHOLE LIFE.~~" or something of that nature. which is EXACTLY HOW I FELT!!
;D And he's into TOBACCO, TOO~!! LMFAO HE RAN UP THE STAIRS THE OTHER DAY TO TELL ME ABOUT SATANSTOMPINGCATERPILLARS. ...and i was like, what, Black Moth Super Rainbow before they WERE Black Moth Super Rainbow~? YES I KNOW. :3 but i was very happy that it made him so excited.
I TOLD HIM THAT TOBACCO'S COMING TO SALT LAKE CITY
BUT WE CAN'T GO BECAUSE IT'S AT A BAR D8
AND NOW HE IS JUST AS SAD AS I AM. OH SIGH.
We talk about this music 294924 times a day now. :'3 Sibling can't stand it.
YOU KNOW WHAT I CAN'T STAND?
KNOWING I WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE TOBACCO.
~~OR~~ BLACK MOTH SUPER RAINBOW.
at least I won't be able to see Black Moth Super Rainbow perform because they'll be in Texas at the Austin Music Festival. I HAVE NEVER WANTED TO GO TO TEXAS SO BADLY BEFORE. LMFAO. I HAVE NEVER EVEN ~~CARED~~ ABOUT TEXAS THAT MUCH. UNTIL THIS MOMENT. OH MY GOD. *FLAILS ABOUT WILDLY* i don't know, and now the WHITE STRIPES aren't making music anymore ajjkssls;;;;
btw, LENE LOVICH? I NEED AN ALBUM.
AAAAAND...
OH, AND THE OTHER DAY I WENT TO HOT TOPIC!! With Sibling, Ericc, and the mother. 8D And I got a little blue caterpillar that flashes police siren lights at you when you squeeze him. HE SMILES. He... D8 he looked like such a misfit. They put him in the section with all the CANDY AND EVERYTHING!! He didn't even have a price sticker on him, and no one could believe that I WANTED HIM in the first place, but I had to take him home. LMFAO. SO NOW I HAVE THIS LITTLE SQUISHY CATERPILLAR JUST SITTING ON MY DRESSER.
HIS NAME IS VIETCATERPILLAR AMADEUS WORMY THE THIRD.
MY LIFE IS FASCINATING.
yes well i'm going now.
this entry was very pointless.
I'M TIRED AND I'M NAUSEOUS
AND I HAVE NOTHING MORE TO SAY
SO ~~GOODBYE~~!!
*SLAMS DOOR*
Everyone is going to laugh at me when I tell them this, but I used to have a Thing about rabbits. I have had NIGHTMARE AFTER NIGHTMARE involving the things, sometimes not even directly. I DON'T KNOW IF THERE'S SYMBOLISM IN THAT!! And this was BEFORE I saw "Rabbits" by David Lynch, too. 3: I don't resent them for it, anymore, but... my god.
UH, ANYWAY, EVERYONE IS ANSWERING THIS STUPID QUESTION.
AND LISTENING TO ANIMAL COLLECTIVE WHILE THEY DO IT.
SOOOOO I'LL JUST SAY...
I'M A ~~RAM/GOAT/SHEEP~~!! IN THE CHINESE ZODIAC.
NO ONE CAN SETTLE ON A NAME FOR ME. ;D uh
a METAL RAM/GOAT/SHEEP specifically.
METAL SHEEP - 1871, 1931, 1991~!
The Metal Sheep will have great faith in himself and know the value of his talents. He can camouflage his high degree of sensitivity by putting up a brave front, although actually he has a very vulnerable ego and is easily offended by offhand remarks.
Metal reinforces his flowing artistic tastes and he will be inspired to search continuously for beauty in all forms. His home could be a master piece of interior decoration, as he is most concerned about harmony and balance in his daily life. Leaving a familiar environment can be traumatic for him; he will find it hard to adjust to change.
This type of Sheep will also aspire to security in both his domestic and financial life. His services won't come cheap, although he is not averse to handing out free meal tickets now and then.
His social activities will be limited to those people he cherishes or those who could be of use to his career. The uninitiated will have to wait for him to warm up to their advances.
Beneath his calm and helpful exterior, the Metal Sheep has unstable emotions that he finds hard to control. As a result, he can be possessive, jealous and overprotective of his loved ones. He should allow people about him more freedom. Expecting everyone to be at his beck and call will only cause resentment, as well as resistance to the invaluable contributions he could make.
...
BUT!! I WAS ~~SUPPOSED~~ TO BE A WATER MONKEY.
So do with that what you will, I suppose~! I don't think it represents my animal spirit ~~at all,~~ mainly because... ;D my animal spirit is usually a dolphin, and ~~sometimes~~ an otter!! And the dolphin has been my--oh my god, paranoia--my... animal spirit since I was a little kid, so there you have it. ;D ;D ;D I will even use a dolphin icon just to HAMMER THAT POINT HOME. LMFAO.
BUT THERE NOW I'VE DONE IT. LIKE THE SHEEP I AM.
hum.
I've been sick for a good long while, but I think I got over the worst of it!! Unfortunately, this means I have nothing all that ~~interesting~~ to update with right now. I will say that I have pretty godawful FEVER DREAMS!! ...well, okay, I either have really weird and erotic dreams or terrible, nonsensical nightmares when I'm sick. ...I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING, OKAY. LMFAO.
but these last few nights... huh. I don't remember my dream last night, but in my dream before THAT, I was pulling off all of my fingernails. ALL THE WAY. I pulled the first one off by accident, stared at it and the blood that resulted, laughed, and just kept GOING until I was in all this pain and there was all this blood and I was just LAUGHING. I ... DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. LMFAO. *SOBS TO WIND CHIMES* but i will never take my fingernails for-granted again. ...and then in the dream I had before THAT, this lady was ... making a coffin for her baby in front of me. Because her baby was ~~terminally ill~~ and going to die soon.
...and I JUST LAUGHED AT HER. LMFAO AND THE BABY. D8
and then I turned into a little kid again for some reason, and I was playing pretend with sibling. 8D So I guess my subconscious wanted to get me to empathize with the baby?? except then I just ignored the baby and ran around shouting things about superheroes, so.
THE POINT IS, EVEN THOUGH THEY SEEM VAGUE (THEY WERE, BTW), BOTH NIGHTMARES WERE VERY FEVERISH AND UNPLEASANT. I think I might have dreamed about a Cloverfield/Godzillalike monster at one point, too, and I just ran around talking about how ~~cool~~ it was while everyone else freaked out. I feel like I should note that this is a far cry from the USUAL path my dreams take, with me being the only one aware of the disaster and everyone else insisting that it's FINE!! to the point of blind stupidity.
huhhklg;;; i think i will have to analyze all this. but maybe not?? the result of high, high temperatures and low spirits. ANYWAY, I'M BETTER NOW. MOSTLY. VERY NAUSEOUS, BUT I'M GETTING OVER THAT SHH.
what else, what else.
OH!! 8D My violin lessons are the best ever. I might as well THROW THAT OUT THERE. I have this very intimate, very passionate, very ~~odd~~ relationship with the violin. I know she is a lady, but I don't know her name. :3 But she has the curves that ladies do. We're wary of each other, still; we don't have one another figured out quite yet, and I'm not QUITE in love with her... it's more like lust. ;D Sometimes she RESISTS me and my fingering (LAWL), sometimes she gives in and we make magic happen, either way it's a very powerful and empowering thing! To finally play the instrument that I've felt a connection to for so long~!
My violin TEACHER is a very groovy fellow, too. ;3 I call him Jim the Violinist. He has an adventurer's beard and a violinist's fingers~! And he BELIEVES IN ME so much. HE KNOWS WHAT I AM FEELING ABOUT MUSIC BEFORE I TELL HIM. D8 And this last time, he called me his HERO!! And he's very talkative, very passionate about what he does, very enthusiastic to see what I can do~! He told me that this wasn't just a passing fancy, that playing the violin was a LIFESTYLE, and I think it really is~!! I think it's a big part of my ~~DESTINY,~~ or whatsit. And we're getting RESULTS, too. My feet are getting better at tapping along to the beat (more related to physical, CP reasons than my ability to keep a rhythm or get a rhythm going ;3), it's getting easier and easier to SLIP INTO that violin-playing... uh, STANCE!!
AND I CAN ALREADY PLAY "TWINKLE, TWINKLE LITTLE STAR" AND "MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB." 8D *PROUD* Not perfectly, and I feel bad for my family because they have to listen to me practice, but
OH I DON'T KNOW!! THIS ALL FEELS LIKE SUCH A PERFECT FIT FOR ME.
unfortunately, I was so sick that I could barely drag myself out of bed, much less hold the violin up, this last time. so I HAD TO CANCEL. and i was angry at myself the whole day. LMFAO. Buuuuut we soldier on, I guess, and I think he was very understanding~!
OH AND I GOT ERICC INTO BLACK MOTH SUPER RAINBOW. I MEAN, ~~REALLY~~ INTO THEM. WE ARE BOTH COMPLETE FANBOYS NOW AND MY LIFE IS NEARLY COMPLETE. LMFAO. His reaction to their music was ~~PERFECT~~!! I mean, we were up at eight AM and entirely sleep-deprived out of our minds, but I shoved "Forever Heavy" in his face, and he smiled SO WIDELY and said, "...I'VE BEEN WAITING TO HEAR THIS ~~MY WHOLE LIFE.~~" or something of that nature. which is EXACTLY HOW I FELT!!
;D And he's into TOBACCO, TOO~!! LMFAO HE RAN UP THE STAIRS THE OTHER DAY TO TELL ME ABOUT SATANSTOMPINGCATERPILLARS. ...and i was like, what, Black Moth Super Rainbow before they WERE Black Moth Super Rainbow~? YES I KNOW. :3 but i was very happy that it made him so excited.
I TOLD HIM THAT TOBACCO'S COMING TO SALT LAKE CITY
BUT WE CAN'T GO BECAUSE IT'S AT A BAR D8
AND NOW HE IS JUST AS SAD AS I AM. OH SIGH.
We talk about this music 294924 times a day now. :'3 Sibling can't stand it.
YOU KNOW WHAT I CAN'T STAND?
KNOWING I WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE TOBACCO.
~~OR~~ BLACK MOTH SUPER RAINBOW.
at least I won't be able to see Black Moth Super Rainbow perform because they'll be in Texas at the Austin Music Festival. I HAVE NEVER WANTED TO GO TO TEXAS SO BADLY BEFORE. LMFAO. I HAVE NEVER EVEN ~~CARED~~ ABOUT TEXAS THAT MUCH. UNTIL THIS MOMENT. OH MY GOD. *FLAILS ABOUT WILDLY* i don't know, and now the WHITE STRIPES aren't making music anymore ajjkssls;;;;
btw, LENE LOVICH? I NEED AN ALBUM.
AAAAAND...
OH, AND THE OTHER DAY I WENT TO HOT TOPIC!! With Sibling, Ericc, and the mother. 8D And I got a little blue caterpillar that flashes police siren lights at you when you squeeze him. HE SMILES. He... D8 he looked like such a misfit. They put him in the section with all the CANDY AND EVERYTHING!! He didn't even have a price sticker on him, and no one could believe that I WANTED HIM in the first place, but I had to take him home. LMFAO. SO NOW I HAVE THIS LITTLE SQUISHY CATERPILLAR JUST SITTING ON MY DRESSER.
HIS NAME IS VIETCATERPILLAR AMADEUS WORMY THE THIRD.
MY LIFE IS FASCINATING.
yes well i'm going now.
this entry was very pointless.
I'M TIRED AND I'M NAUSEOUS
AND I HAVE NOTHING MORE TO SAY
SO ~~GOODBYE~~!!
*SLAMS DOOR*