My Thoughts at 5:22 AM
i have not slept at all and I've been up for approximately 20 hours. IT HAS BEEN THRILLING. No, it's kind of just... been constant cycles of "ALL RIGHT, I'M GOING TO SLEEP NOW." "Never mind, I'm not. :D" and "Oo, let's read~!" yesyes, been reading so much. I started and finished two Vivaldi biographies earlier (yesterday?), and I babbled on to the mother about everything I read and new (...knew!!!) and it was actually very fun. And the grandmother gave me this book about past lives and past life regression and hypnosis, so I've been reading ~~that,~~ as well. and listening to my cat meow.
you know, a second ago I thought my ownly (...or only WOW) thought was "I wish I could purr like my cat."
...
I STILL KIND OF WISH I COULD.
It'd be kind of AMAZZING (yes, with two z's ;3) to purr. Not meow, because my kitty's meow is annoying. but I could purr.
um. I never did talk about my New Year's in any amount of detail, did I?? TOO BAD, BECAUSE I WON'T. AHA how do you like that.
....... would you believe me if I said I felt kind of delirious? maybe.
SHE KNOOOOOWS WHERE THE RAAAAAAAIN GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOES~~
SHE BRAKES, SHE BRE--BRAKES FOR RAAAAAAAAINBOWS~~~
oh
OH!! Speaking of rainbows, I got another book for--.... ahem. Another POEM for The Rainbow Book done and posted it both at the writing journal and dA. :D Finally, despite the fact that I have given up on using TAW temporarily since it is impossible to use and altogether aggravating and I only hope I can get my new music off of there + Jeeb's CDs burnt in time. ... because I'm convinced it's going to die, you see. holy shit
i feel so gleeful and paranoid at the same time, no lie. I don't even know, it's like I'm jumping at every sound but this music is making me SO happy that I feel ocnflicted. or even conflicted. I'm too lazy to backspace. Backspacing is for people who care, and I ~~VERY CLEARLY~~ DO NOT CARE. AT ALL. EVER. or well especially right now. i could just bounce all over the place and then i could turn and there would be something very frightening beh--............. ew nope nothing frightening just checked. anyway, there would be SOMETHING of that nature behind me and I'd SCREAM and then I'd go right back to bouncing around.
...
that's how I feel RIGHT NOW.
I had something so important to say. or maybe not, but it felt important. ugh.
OH!! AHAHAHA never mind I can totally save that for the 'voice journal. ...which yes, will be updated soon. ... I SWEAR WE'RE NOT ALL HERMITS DDDDD8 just getting back into the habit of journaling is difficult
EVEN FOR ~~ME~~!!. I keep telling myself i'll update today and today becomes a tomorrow and then i just never do.
I have started calling everyone "friend." Moose has helped me to realize that this might aaaaactually be Flapjack's fault. hmm,. <-- that
WOW I SRSLY KEEP LOOKING BEHIND ME JUST WAITINGF OR SOMETHING TERRIBLE TO HAPPEN (YES THAT) BUT NOTHING DOES
One of the downsides of rediscovering how much passion I hold for Viva's music itself (I don't know if my words are making any "sense") is that I've realized how much burning desire I hold to play the violin again. D8 This isn't fair, since everyone expects me to play piano. Viva has always supported me, but he knows that the piano isn't exactly... MY instrument, he knows I've wanted to play the violin for an awfully long time. I think, though, that playing piano is still a good... ~~STARTING~~ point, because it's strengthening my fingers, so by the time I need to play the violin I'll be kind of prepared, dexterity-wise. :3
I KNOW NOT A ONE OF YOU CARES ABOUT THAT LMFAOOOOO BUT DAMNIT I HAD TO GET IT OUT!!!!
See, now I have to listen to "L'Estate." ...god, if this version is horrible I... well I'll probablyj ust change it. yes, that. intriguing notions indeed.
...
No, I think I like it. but there's still not enough passion during the storm parts of the song.
um
HAHA once I started listening to Vivaldi my paranoia level actually went down significantly. 8D This isn't surprising at all, as Vivi usually comforts me during SUCH TIMES!! Except I think tonight he's just thinking "TO HELL WITH THIS MADMAN I WANT TO SLEEP" LMFAOOOOOO BUT YOU KNOW
the other day I went to the mall!! AND I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO SHOP FOR TERRIBLE HORRIBLE NO GOOD VERY BAD CLOTHES. ... I hate shopping for clothes, none of them fit... ~~ME~~ or how I see myself and the mother always makes me try on these terrible things and it is just not fun DDD8 ...except when I find something tartan or maybe argyle. OR SOMETIMES PURPLE.
But I did go to F.Y.E. :D And get myself a delightful B-52's CD for ten bucks~! It had "Love Shack" on it AND the cover was rainbowriffic, so I was sold. LMFAOOOOO AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH it physically hurts me 8D especially that song "Dry County," about getting on the porch and swinging?? and "Cosmic Thing" is... is aliens partying in SPACE, which I approve of. And I saw this DVD set there with all of this information about the planets and the universe and I wanted it so badly but it was too expesnsi ...expn ................ expensive. RTHERE!! ....... damnit.
AND I HAD PIZZA!! And this garlicky whatsit that would have made Lena and company absolutely die, probably. but I loved it.
I have this weird pain... somewhere... maybe I should think about where it is.
... oh well it's probably a growing pain or something. ANYWAY
The sibling brought Connor and these two friends with her to the mall :D I liked both of them a lot and I made both of them LAUGH!! Especially with my "that's what she said" joke:
Mother: IT'S STRAIGHT RIGHT??
Me: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID
SIBLING'S FEMALE FRIENDTHING: AKSDLAFSKLL LMFAOOOOOO
... so simple, and yet so hilarious. hm. i keep saying that. i feel like Mister Hm Thumbs Up.
LMFAOOOOO EVEN HIS ~~THUMBS~~ HM!!!!!!
Wow, the man reading this sonnet from the beginning of "L'Estate" has the DWEEBIEST GLASSES I HAVE EVER SEEN on anyone ever. ...People treat classical like it's so sophisticated, and I'm beginning to realize how SICK AND TIRED of that mindset I am. LMFAO. Classical was played in front of noble people just as much as it was in front of common people and actually, old opera houses weren't proper at all, or so I'm told, particularly in Vivaldi's time. The opera house was a place for rowdiness and gambling and opera was a form of entertainment, not something PROPER!! People got spat upon and there were orange peels thrown about and people didn't even pay attention to the opera itself much, not the plot or anything.
PLUS, OPERA BACK IN THOSE DAYS WAS LIKE... LMFAOOOOO IN SUCH HIGH DEMAND THAT COMPOSERS HAD TO SIT AND CHURCH--...WOW, CHURN IT OUT WITHOUT EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT SOMETIMES. ... and take a true musical genius--no, not Vives, though he is one (sorry Vivishki 3:)--MOZART! Mozart was one of the most improper men EVER, not just for his time but in general. ;D He was pretty much a rock star and very vulgar and perverted. yep. And yet his music sounds so elegant.
MY POINT IS, CLASSICAL DOESN'T HAVE TO BE... ALL SERIOUSNESS ALL THE TIME. That's why I like this Victor Borge the father turned me onto--he combines classical with comedy and it just makes me LAUGH LMSFSMFFSM and Mozie likes it, too! :D Which just kind of figures. But I mean I've gone to quite a few symphonies and I've been to "The Marriage of Figaro," too, and I always see these snobby and stiff people there.
One of the Vivaldi biographies I read today rubbed me the wrong way, because of that--I forgot what it was CALLED, but it just seemed so pretentious and there was too much analysis of the music and not much enjoyment. I didn't like that at all, LMFAO. It started to feel kind of impersonal, and even though it was supposed to be about Vivaldi and how he was the "Voice of the Baroque," it felt more like... ... it didn't really capture who Viva was, it just RATTLED FACTS off at me and a few badly-translated letters and then just left me to process it all.
I LOVED THE OTHER ONE THOUGH LMFAOOOO <3333 so I guess it just depends on the biography you pick up!!
that was surprisingly coherent. maybe I'm just so tired that it's reversing on it...self?? AND I'M GETTING SANER AND SANER ESPECIALLY NOW THAT IT'S SIX AM AND I STILL HAVEN'T SLEPT??
...
oh god and I'm getting my hair cut today. I am going to be so exhausted. LMFAOOOOOOO WAY TO ~~GO,~~~ ME. uneven tildes. that drives me bananas.
THIS SONG DRIVES ME BANANAS!!
I should be sleeping.
....... why aren't I sleeping
fuck you, I'll sleep when I WANT TO. <-- 'kay, that alone is a good indication that I really need sleep right now LMFAOOOO
Going to go try AGAIN.
This has been incoherent babbling with your host me. Tune in next week to something whatsit I'm so tired I don't care~! 8D
you know, a second ago I thought my ownly (...or only WOW) thought was "I wish I could purr like my cat."
...
I STILL KIND OF WISH I COULD.
It'd be kind of AMAZZING (yes, with two z's ;3) to purr. Not meow, because my kitty's meow is annoying. but I could purr.
um. I never did talk about my New Year's in any amount of detail, did I?? TOO BAD, BECAUSE I WON'T. AHA how do you like that.
....... would you believe me if I said I felt kind of delirious? maybe.
SHE KNOOOOOWS WHERE THE RAAAAAAAIN GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOES~~
SHE BRAKES, SHE BRE--BRAKES FOR RAAAAAAAAINBOWS~~~
oh
OH!! Speaking of rainbows, I got another book for--.... ahem. Another POEM for The Rainbow Book done and posted it both at the writing journal and dA. :D Finally, despite the fact that I have given up on using TAW temporarily since it is impossible to use and altogether aggravating and I only hope I can get my new music off of there + Jeeb's CDs burnt in time. ... because I'm convinced it's going to die, you see. holy shit
i feel so gleeful and paranoid at the same time, no lie. I don't even know, it's like I'm jumping at every sound but this music is making me SO happy that I feel ocnflicted. or even conflicted. I'm too lazy to backspace. Backspacing is for people who care, and I ~~VERY CLEARLY~~ DO NOT CARE. AT ALL. EVER. or well especially right now. i could just bounce all over the place and then i could turn and there would be something very frightening beh--............. ew nope nothing frightening just checked. anyway, there would be SOMETHING of that nature behind me and I'd SCREAM and then I'd go right back to bouncing around.
...
that's how I feel RIGHT NOW.
I had something so important to say. or maybe not, but it felt important. ugh.
OH!! AHAHAHA never mind I can totally save that for the 'voice journal. ...which yes, will be updated soon. ... I SWEAR WE'RE NOT ALL HERMITS DDDDD8 just getting back into the habit of journaling is difficult
EVEN FOR ~~ME~~!!. I keep telling myself i'll update today and today becomes a tomorrow and then i just never do.
I have started calling everyone "friend." Moose has helped me to realize that this might aaaaactually be Flapjack's fault. hmm,. <-- that
WOW I SRSLY KEEP LOOKING BEHIND ME JUST WAITINGF OR SOMETHING TERRIBLE TO HAPPEN (YES THAT) BUT NOTHING DOES
One of the downsides of rediscovering how much passion I hold for Viva's music itself (I don't know if my words are making any "sense") is that I've realized how much burning desire I hold to play the violin again. D8 This isn't fair, since everyone expects me to play piano. Viva has always supported me, but he knows that the piano isn't exactly... MY instrument, he knows I've wanted to play the violin for an awfully long time. I think, though, that playing piano is still a good... ~~STARTING~~ point, because it's strengthening my fingers, so by the time I need to play the violin I'll be kind of prepared, dexterity-wise. :3
I KNOW NOT A ONE OF YOU CARES ABOUT THAT LMFAOOOOO BUT DAMNIT I HAD TO GET IT OUT!!!!
See, now I have to listen to "L'Estate." ...god, if this version is horrible I... well I'll probablyj ust change it. yes, that. intriguing notions indeed.
...
No, I think I like it. but there's still not enough passion during the storm parts of the song.
um
HAHA once I started listening to Vivaldi my paranoia level actually went down significantly. 8D This isn't surprising at all, as Vivi usually comforts me during SUCH TIMES!! Except I think tonight he's just thinking "TO HELL WITH THIS MADMAN I WANT TO SLEEP" LMFAOOOOOO BUT YOU KNOW
the other day I went to the mall!! AND I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO SHOP FOR TERRIBLE HORRIBLE NO GOOD VERY BAD CLOTHES. ... I hate shopping for clothes, none of them fit... ~~ME~~ or how I see myself and the mother always makes me try on these terrible things and it is just not fun DDD8 ...except when I find something tartan or maybe argyle. OR SOMETIMES PURPLE.
But I did go to F.Y.E. :D And get myself a delightful B-52's CD for ten bucks~! It had "Love Shack" on it AND the cover was rainbowriffic, so I was sold. LMFAOOOOO AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH it physically hurts me 8D especially that song "Dry County," about getting on the porch and swinging?? and "Cosmic Thing" is... is aliens partying in SPACE, which I approve of. And I saw this DVD set there with all of this information about the planets and the universe and I wanted it so badly but it was too expesnsi ...expn ................ expensive. RTHERE!! ....... damnit.
AND I HAD PIZZA!! And this garlicky whatsit that would have made Lena and company absolutely die, probably. but I loved it.
I have this weird pain... somewhere... maybe I should think about where it is.
... oh well it's probably a growing pain or something. ANYWAY
The sibling brought Connor and these two friends with her to the mall :D I liked both of them a lot and I made both of them LAUGH!! Especially with my "that's what she said" joke:
Mother: IT'S STRAIGHT RIGHT??
Me: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID
SIBLING'S FEMALE FRIENDTHING: AKSDLAFSKLL LMFAOOOOOO
... so simple, and yet so hilarious. hm. i keep saying that. i feel like Mister Hm Thumbs Up.
LMFAOOOOO EVEN HIS ~~THUMBS~~ HM!!!!!!
Wow, the man reading this sonnet from the beginning of "L'Estate" has the DWEEBIEST GLASSES I HAVE EVER SEEN on anyone ever. ...People treat classical like it's so sophisticated, and I'm beginning to realize how SICK AND TIRED of that mindset I am. LMFAO. Classical was played in front of noble people just as much as it was in front of common people and actually, old opera houses weren't proper at all, or so I'm told, particularly in Vivaldi's time. The opera house was a place for rowdiness and gambling and opera was a form of entertainment, not something PROPER!! People got spat upon and there were orange peels thrown about and people didn't even pay attention to the opera itself much, not the plot or anything.
PLUS, OPERA BACK IN THOSE DAYS WAS LIKE... LMFAOOOOO IN SUCH HIGH DEMAND THAT COMPOSERS HAD TO SIT AND CHURCH--...WOW, CHURN IT OUT WITHOUT EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT SOMETIMES. ... and take a true musical genius--no, not Vives, though he is one (sorry Vivishki 3:)--MOZART! Mozart was one of the most improper men EVER, not just for his time but in general. ;D He was pretty much a rock star and very vulgar and perverted. yep. And yet his music sounds so elegant.
MY POINT IS, CLASSICAL DOESN'T HAVE TO BE... ALL SERIOUSNESS ALL THE TIME. That's why I like this Victor Borge the father turned me onto--he combines classical with comedy and it just makes me LAUGH LMSFSMFFSM and Mozie likes it, too! :D Which just kind of figures. But I mean I've gone to quite a few symphonies and I've been to "The Marriage of Figaro," too, and I always see these snobby and stiff people there.
One of the Vivaldi biographies I read today rubbed me the wrong way, because of that--I forgot what it was CALLED, but it just seemed so pretentious and there was too much analysis of the music and not much enjoyment. I didn't like that at all, LMFAO. It started to feel kind of impersonal, and even though it was supposed to be about Vivaldi and how he was the "Voice of the Baroque," it felt more like... ... it didn't really capture who Viva was, it just RATTLED FACTS off at me and a few badly-translated letters and then just left me to process it all.
I LOVED THE OTHER ONE THOUGH LMFAOOOO <3333 so I guess it just depends on the biography you pick up!!
that was surprisingly coherent. maybe I'm just so tired that it's reversing on it...self?? AND I'M GETTING SANER AND SANER ESPECIALLY NOW THAT IT'S SIX AM AND I STILL HAVEN'T SLEPT??
...
oh god and I'm getting my hair cut today. I am going to be so exhausted. LMFAOOOOOOO WAY TO ~~GO,~~~ ME. uneven tildes. that drives me bananas.
THIS SONG DRIVES ME BANANAS!!
I should be sleeping.
....... why aren't I sleeping
fuck you, I'll sleep when I WANT TO. <-- 'kay, that alone is a good indication that I really need sleep right now LMFAOOOO
Going to go try AGAIN.
This has been incoherent babbling with your host me. Tune in next week to something whatsit I'm so tired I don't care~! 8D