The Woman Two Desks to the Right and One Row Behind Me
I know all about this woman. I have had two, maybe three, direct conversations with her. They have lasted less than 15 seconds.
However I can tell you that she has been taking belly-dancing classes, and spends way too much money on the associated costume and jewelry. She also has these packages delivered to work. Whether this is some attempt to make herself appear special and important, or because she lives in a derelict house the courier won't go near with a 40-foot pole, I don't know. At a guess, I would think the former is more likely.
I can also tell you, without a shadow of uncertainty, that she spent the last weekend babysitting her brother's dog, and is now very taken with the idea of having a dog of her own. She was quite surprised, however, to hear from said brother as they hadn't spoken in several years before the dog-related-weekend, and when he called she was, in fact, expecting an invitation to some event he might have been hosting in honour of the long weekend. She was quite annoyed to be asked to babysit his dog while he enjoyed a holiday.
She may or may not have a teenage son. This same teenage son may actually be a flatmate who is considerably younger than herself. I have yet to determine this.
I also cannot stand this woman, as all of this information I have acquired without any effort on my part, and only through hearing her loud voice repeat the details of these events over and over again to anyone who will listen. I really couldn't care less, but she seems to believe everyone should.
I also think she would be quite flattered to know an entire entry exists about her somewhere on the internet, regardless of what it says. She may even be too slow to understand any or all of it.
Natural selection should have taken care of some of the people in this place a long, long time ago.