box
me: (pointing under table) "That box has been there since before I started working here. And it hasn't moved. I have no idea what it is."
Brian: "It's got a healthy layer of dust on top!"
me: "That's like Raiders of the Lost Ark stuff there."
Brian: "You should open it up!"
me: "But then something scary might come out and melt our faces off." (peering in closer through the dust) "It's got Lars's name on it. I should ask him what it is. I really wonder what's in there."
Brian: "I'm guessing Gwyneth Paltrow's head."
Or Andy Samberg's wang.
Brian: "It's got a healthy layer of dust on top!"
me: "That's like Raiders of the Lost Ark stuff there."
Brian: "You should open it up!"
me: "But then something scary might come out and melt our faces off." (peering in closer through the dust) "It's got Lars's name on it. I should ask him what it is. I really wonder what's in there."
Brian: "I'm guessing Gwyneth Paltrow's head."
Or Andy Samberg's wang.