No more drama!
OK so I took the advice! Thank you ladies.
I told Jay that I loved him as a friend and that if I were straight there would nothing in the world that I would like more than to give a relationship a try, but I am not.
He got kinda mad at first. Said that I used to be with guys so what was my problem now, was he just not good enough? I knew it was anger talking so I told him that I never felt anything with any of those guys and I didn't feel comfortable in my skin, it wasn't till I was with Heather that I realised why and I figured out who I was.
He cried, I really wish he didn't and it scared me becuse he is this tough hard guy and there he is crying. I didn't know what to do. I told him that when the right girl came around, and that I know she will, he will realise that this was never what he thought it could be and that I could never make him fully happy. We hugged, I left. I feel bad. I hate when men cry. The only time I ever saw my dad cry was at my grandma's funeral and it also scared the shit out of me. I never let anyone see me cry.
I think I have gotten Heather out of my system. Maybe it was more my pride then anything else but there was something deeply satisfying about me fucking her then me not answering her frantic calls. I think I just hate being left.
So there is this coffe shop near my house and the cutest girl works there. She is this really pretty little asian girl. She is always really nice to me and she talks to me a lot. I feel like she goes out of her way to talk to me and sometimes I even think she is flirting with me but my gadar sucks and she looks way way way to femme and straight laced to be a dyke. I want to exchange numbers but I don't want to be that chick who chases straight chicks, you know?
I told Jay that I loved him as a friend and that if I were straight there would nothing in the world that I would like more than to give a relationship a try, but I am not.
He got kinda mad at first. Said that I used to be with guys so what was my problem now, was he just not good enough? I knew it was anger talking so I told him that I never felt anything with any of those guys and I didn't feel comfortable in my skin, it wasn't till I was with Heather that I realised why and I figured out who I was.
He cried, I really wish he didn't and it scared me becuse he is this tough hard guy and there he is crying. I didn't know what to do. I told him that when the right girl came around, and that I know she will, he will realise that this was never what he thought it could be and that I could never make him fully happy. We hugged, I left. I feel bad. I hate when men cry. The only time I ever saw my dad cry was at my grandma's funeral and it also scared the shit out of me. I never let anyone see me cry.
I think I have gotten Heather out of my system. Maybe it was more my pride then anything else but there was something deeply satisfying about me fucking her then me not answering her frantic calls. I think I just hate being left.
So there is this coffe shop near my house and the cutest girl works there. She is this really pretty little asian girl. She is always really nice to me and she talks to me a lot. I feel like she goes out of her way to talk to me and sometimes I even think she is flirting with me but my gadar sucks and she looks way way way to femme and straight laced to be a dyke. I want to exchange numbers but I don't want to be that chick who chases straight chicks, you know?