Life's like an hourglass glued to the table...
No one can find the rewind button now, so cradle your head in your hands....and breathe.
So my life has been sooo stressful lately. Work has been crazy busy, and looking ahead at the weeks to come, it seems it's only going to get worse.
Colin and I are buying a car, and the payments and processes are just so crazy.
The house looks like a mess. And I don't have the time and/or energy to clean it, or finish it up. We still don't have all our furniture from Fecera's yet. We're into the 11th week now. I'm really pissed.
Ants keep coming in from the laundry room. We have an ant trap outside the laundry room door outside, right inside, and one under the stove. Doesn't seem to be helping, and it's quite disgusting. I just leave the vacuum cleaner out and suck em up when I see them. I don't know what else to do, and I don't know why they're in my house to begin with!!
The bills are getting smaller, yet they still just seem so huge. I don't know how my VISA bill stays so large. Well, yea, I do, it's all stuff for the house. But still.
I'm starting to not feel as appreciated anymore by Colin. He goes to work, when he comes home he sits playing Play Station until I have dinner ready. Then after we eat, he either goes back up to play Play Station, or we go to bed, and he falls asleep within 15 min of laying there. It's almost like we're buddies now. I know he loves me, he tells me like 50 times a day. It just seemed like we were closer when we weren't living together.
I've done everything for this kid. I drive him everywhere, I do all his 'business' calls for him (bank loans, car dealerships, insurance), I'm putting his car under my name for loan purposes and insurance purposes....and I just don't feel like he appreciates it.
I know this isn't a big deal, but it still kinda bothers me a bit. He didn't get me anything for my birthday. Now, he didn't have a car around the time of my birthday or anything, so I know it was hard to do, but still. Then he says to me 'I'll take you shopping and you can buy something'. Boy doesn't that sound familiar *ahem* Tommy. I want something from the heart! Something that he sees and says 'Wow, that really reminds me of Kristi' or 'I really think Kristi would like that, I think I'll buy it for her'. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something from the heart. He did get me a wireless keyboard and mouse, but that was because he wanted a keyboard for his PlayStation now that he can play online. So in a way, wasn't that a gift for him, not me?
I don't know. I don't know what to think anymore. All I know is we need curtains for the downstairs, blinds for our room, the chest of drawers from Fecera's for our room, I need to finish painting the set of drawers for our room, we need a carpet for our room, the computer room looks trashed and also needs curtains or blinds, I need to finish up the blinds in the bathroom, pictures need to be hung throughout the house, I need to wash the kitchen and bathroom floor, the entire house needs to be vacuumed, the laundry room needs to be cleaned out.............I just don't know what to do! Where to start! And everytime I want to do something, Colin goes 'why don't you do that tomorrow'. Then come 'tomorrow' he says the same thing again. So if I want his help, looks like it'll never get done. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's great with picking up papers and such laying around the living room, and he does the dishes all the time. It's not like he's a lazy ass and lays around and does nothing. But when he sees something that doesn't 'have' to be done, he'll put it off.
It just makes me wonder...should I still be at home? Am I ready to 'own' my own home?
So my life has been sooo stressful lately. Work has been crazy busy, and looking ahead at the weeks to come, it seems it's only going to get worse.
Colin and I are buying a car, and the payments and processes are just so crazy.
The house looks like a mess. And I don't have the time and/or energy to clean it, or finish it up. We still don't have all our furniture from Fecera's yet. We're into the 11th week now. I'm really pissed.
Ants keep coming in from the laundry room. We have an ant trap outside the laundry room door outside, right inside, and one under the stove. Doesn't seem to be helping, and it's quite disgusting. I just leave the vacuum cleaner out and suck em up when I see them. I don't know what else to do, and I don't know why they're in my house to begin with!!
The bills are getting smaller, yet they still just seem so huge. I don't know how my VISA bill stays so large. Well, yea, I do, it's all stuff for the house. But still.
I'm starting to not feel as appreciated anymore by Colin. He goes to work, when he comes home he sits playing Play Station until I have dinner ready. Then after we eat, he either goes back up to play Play Station, or we go to bed, and he falls asleep within 15 min of laying there. It's almost like we're buddies now. I know he loves me, he tells me like 50 times a day. It just seemed like we were closer when we weren't living together.
I've done everything for this kid. I drive him everywhere, I do all his 'business' calls for him (bank loans, car dealerships, insurance), I'm putting his car under my name for loan purposes and insurance purposes....and I just don't feel like he appreciates it.
I know this isn't a big deal, but it still kinda bothers me a bit. He didn't get me anything for my birthday. Now, he didn't have a car around the time of my birthday or anything, so I know it was hard to do, but still. Then he says to me 'I'll take you shopping and you can buy something'. Boy doesn't that sound familiar *ahem* Tommy. I want something from the heart! Something that he sees and says 'Wow, that really reminds me of Kristi' or 'I really think Kristi would like that, I think I'll buy it for her'. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something from the heart. He did get me a wireless keyboard and mouse, but that was because he wanted a keyboard for his PlayStation now that he can play online. So in a way, wasn't that a gift for him, not me?
I don't know. I don't know what to think anymore. All I know is we need curtains for the downstairs, blinds for our room, the chest of drawers from Fecera's for our room, I need to finish painting the set of drawers for our room, we need a carpet for our room, the computer room looks trashed and also needs curtains or blinds, I need to finish up the blinds in the bathroom, pictures need to be hung throughout the house, I need to wash the kitchen and bathroom floor, the entire house needs to be vacuumed, the laundry room needs to be cleaned out.............I just don't know what to do! Where to start! And everytime I want to do something, Colin goes 'why don't you do that tomorrow'. Then come 'tomorrow' he says the same thing again. So if I want his help, looks like it'll never get done. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's great with picking up papers and such laying around the living room, and he does the dishes all the time. It's not like he's a lazy ass and lays around and does nothing. But when he sees something that doesn't 'have' to be done, he'll put it off.
It just makes me wonder...should I still be at home? Am I ready to 'own' my own home?