This Blog Has Nothing to Do With Michael Jackson
(Except for the title.)
Recently, I discovered that nearly everything I learned at summer camp has come in handy since. For example. Summer camp was where I learned what to do if you see a black bear. Before I went to summer camp, I had one experience with a bear during which my friend threw a shovel at it and we ran away. This is what you should not do when you see a bear.
I also learned that white pines are endangered but crucial because they provide habitats for animals, and that red pines need bush fires to survive. That has not come in handy since, but if I ever see a forest fire, I'll know to run around checking for white pines and if I don't find any I'll just let that shit burn.
I learned how to steer a canoe at summer camp. We have now lived on a lake for almost seven years and steering a canoe has been useful on many occasions. Racing a canoe around sharp rocks in a lake filled with water snakes and leeches with three other amateur canoists in the boat with you as we did at camp has not yet come in handy, but I keep hoping.
At summer camp, I learned that if you whine enough, someone will bait your hook for you. I learned that creepy animals stuffed so that they look like they're about to lunge at you are a part of life. I learned that leeches with red on their backs won't stick to your skin like the all-black ones will (or is it the other way around?). I learned that archery is a sport in which you try to puncture balloons stuck to haystacks from fifteen feet, and if you do so, you will get a freezie (I'm on to you, Robin Hood). I learned that if you have a dude for a counselor, you should not follow him into the swimming pool changeroom. And I learned that Poison and Natural Disaster always win the Survival Game. If you can't be either of those, sit this one out.
Recently, I discovered that nearly everything I learned at summer camp has come in handy since. For example. Summer camp was where I learned what to do if you see a black bear. Before I went to summer camp, I had one experience with a bear during which my friend threw a shovel at it and we ran away. This is what you should not do when you see a bear.
I also learned that white pines are endangered but crucial because they provide habitats for animals, and that red pines need bush fires to survive. That has not come in handy since, but if I ever see a forest fire, I'll know to run around checking for white pines and if I don't find any I'll just let that shit burn.
I learned how to steer a canoe at summer camp. We have now lived on a lake for almost seven years and steering a canoe has been useful on many occasions. Racing a canoe around sharp rocks in a lake filled with water snakes and leeches with three other amateur canoists in the boat with you as we did at camp has not yet come in handy, but I keep hoping.
At summer camp, I learned that if you whine enough, someone will bait your hook for you. I learned that creepy animals stuffed so that they look like they're about to lunge at you are a part of life. I learned that leeches with red on their backs won't stick to your skin like the all-black ones will (or is it the other way around?). I learned that archery is a sport in which you try to puncture balloons stuck to haystacks from fifteen feet, and if you do so, you will get a freezie (I'm on to you, Robin Hood). I learned that if you have a dude for a counselor, you should not follow him into the swimming pool changeroom. And I learned that Poison and Natural Disaster always win the Survival Game. If you can't be either of those, sit this one out.