(no subject)
I had this whole elaborate entry prepared for an entry. I then pressed post and it was deleted. I really poured myself into the entry and then it disappeared, so I got frustrated and said, "Fuck it," and moved on doing my research paper. I don't even know what I was going to talk about, but I knew I didn't want to run through everything in my mind.
I had this sinking feeling that I wasn't being social at all, kind of being sad and alone and hiding in my room most of the time. I think mostly it was me being extremely tired and not adjusting to everything, but there was a moment where I felt I wasn't meeting as many people as I should have. Now I'm at the point where I'm comfortable with everything. My neighbor and I are very good friends as are my rommates and I. We really get along and we have a good time chatting and drinking. I also know quite a bit of people around the complex. I felt like I didn't know anyone, but when I was walking around with my friend Jason he commented on it saying, "Wow you know like ten times more people than I do." That kind of made me feel a bit better, but how lame is that? Most of the time I just need to get out of my own head. I need to stop over thinking things and just accept it, or just kind of coast along maybe. It can get me into trouble sometimes thinking aobut thnigs too much.
We've walked through the rainforest, I've held a koala, got lost in the city of Brisbane alone after the Soundwave Music festival (I saw Alice in Chains and Nine Inch Nails from like 10 rows away, mind blowing), tried surfing and got to my feet but fell before I could stand up, and I have drank obscene amounts of alcohol. Seriously, everyone around here truly enjoys to have a drink, or many.
Things with Alison are going very well. We still are not together, but it feels like I have a girlfriend back home to be serious. We constantly email each other back and forth, and I was in such a good mood when we videochatted last weekend. I did one of the more dumb things. We share with each other things we write or compose, and I sent a poem I wrote. My frustrations with her in the beginning of us meeting each other certainly influence it a little, but it was about her. I guess I could put it here to put things in perspective:
The Mysterious Romance of Jesus and Mary Magdalene
It’s too hard to be inside your own head
When you’re another person to all of your friends
As your mind looks for a way to slowly crawl out
A puppet that fights to move its own mouth
While everyone says they love who your are inside
What a surprise it would be when they discover your lie
I know it’s hard to breathe while the water rushes in
I’ve been there before; dying will free you from sin
Just flail your arms for just a bit more
Eventually you’ll get your body towards the shore
I’ve done what I can to help and now I must leave
22 hours by air is no way to catch some sleep
I tried to teach you to fade in a crowded room
Use your beautiful green eyes to look for someone new
He’ll sweep you off your feet with his literary references
He’ll say that he loves you and you’ll get offended
I know it’s hard to breathe with your cracked ribs
It’s hard to let air pass through when your breathing thins
Your lungs will sting as your chest begins to swell
Your lungs will collapse into their own private hell
I know this is where you wanted to be
I figure I’ll join you on this lovers retreat
As happiness tries to stroll in; you lock the door
It’s not the first time he’s experienced this before
He won’t get upset; he will sit with his wryly smile
The plan has been set; you’ll feel the effects in awhile
I know it’s hard to breathe with your throat cut
Just wish you knew happiness was as warm as your blood
Few panicked breaths bring on a panicked sweat
Happiness smiles as he gets his revenge
He kicked down the door and demanded to be heard
He knew that you wouldn’t let him get in a word
I know it’s hard to breathe when your heart beat stops
At least everything you wanted is what you got
Yeah, I don't think it's all that bad, but it was just something I was really proud of for writing. It was more that I feel coming here, I've been able to tap into a more creative side of myself especially with my creative writing class that is basically forcing me to come up with a story from my imagiantion, or at least draw from past experiences, or something.
I love it here though, I do have some great friends that I will surely miss when I leave. I shouldn't even be mentioning that, that's so far away. Though I feel like I'm all ready out of money. I spent 300 to go to a music festival at Byron Bay in New South Wales. The place is apparently stunningly beautiful and many people say it is their favorite spot in Australia. I will be there for 4 days for camping and 3 days of music with: Ben Harper (2 Nights), Xavier Rudd, John Butler Trio, State Radio, Blues Traveler, Jason Mraz, Augie March, Ash Grunwald, and so many others that I forgot. It's safe to say that I am super stoked on it and it will be some of the best days I will have here.
We are also currently planning a trip to New Zealand for 6 days. We are looking into doing some couch surfing so that will make it interesting. I just really want to go there because I know it is stunningly beautiful.
I really hope all is well with everyone back home.
Cheers.
I had this sinking feeling that I wasn't being social at all, kind of being sad and alone and hiding in my room most of the time. I think mostly it was me being extremely tired and not adjusting to everything, but there was a moment where I felt I wasn't meeting as many people as I should have. Now I'm at the point where I'm comfortable with everything. My neighbor and I are very good friends as are my rommates and I. We really get along and we have a good time chatting and drinking. I also know quite a bit of people around the complex. I felt like I didn't know anyone, but when I was walking around with my friend Jason he commented on it saying, "Wow you know like ten times more people than I do." That kind of made me feel a bit better, but how lame is that? Most of the time I just need to get out of my own head. I need to stop over thinking things and just accept it, or just kind of coast along maybe. It can get me into trouble sometimes thinking aobut thnigs too much.
We've walked through the rainforest, I've held a koala, got lost in the city of Brisbane alone after the Soundwave Music festival (I saw Alice in Chains and Nine Inch Nails from like 10 rows away, mind blowing), tried surfing and got to my feet but fell before I could stand up, and I have drank obscene amounts of alcohol. Seriously, everyone around here truly enjoys to have a drink, or many.
Things with Alison are going very well. We still are not together, but it feels like I have a girlfriend back home to be serious. We constantly email each other back and forth, and I was in such a good mood when we videochatted last weekend. I did one of the more dumb things. We share with each other things we write or compose, and I sent a poem I wrote. My frustrations with her in the beginning of us meeting each other certainly influence it a little, but it was about her. I guess I could put it here to put things in perspective:
The Mysterious Romance of Jesus and Mary Magdalene
It’s too hard to be inside your own head
When you’re another person to all of your friends
As your mind looks for a way to slowly crawl out
A puppet that fights to move its own mouth
While everyone says they love who your are inside
What a surprise it would be when they discover your lie
I know it’s hard to breathe while the water rushes in
I’ve been there before; dying will free you from sin
Just flail your arms for just a bit more
Eventually you’ll get your body towards the shore
I’ve done what I can to help and now I must leave
22 hours by air is no way to catch some sleep
I tried to teach you to fade in a crowded room
Use your beautiful green eyes to look for someone new
He’ll sweep you off your feet with his literary references
He’ll say that he loves you and you’ll get offended
I know it’s hard to breathe with your cracked ribs
It’s hard to let air pass through when your breathing thins
Your lungs will sting as your chest begins to swell
Your lungs will collapse into their own private hell
I know this is where you wanted to be
I figure I’ll join you on this lovers retreat
As happiness tries to stroll in; you lock the door
It’s not the first time he’s experienced this before
He won’t get upset; he will sit with his wryly smile
The plan has been set; you’ll feel the effects in awhile
I know it’s hard to breathe with your throat cut
Just wish you knew happiness was as warm as your blood
Few panicked breaths bring on a panicked sweat
Happiness smiles as he gets his revenge
He kicked down the door and demanded to be heard
He knew that you wouldn’t let him get in a word
I know it’s hard to breathe when your heart beat stops
At least everything you wanted is what you got
Yeah, I don't think it's all that bad, but it was just something I was really proud of for writing. It was more that I feel coming here, I've been able to tap into a more creative side of myself especially with my creative writing class that is basically forcing me to come up with a story from my imagiantion, or at least draw from past experiences, or something.
I love it here though, I do have some great friends that I will surely miss when I leave. I shouldn't even be mentioning that, that's so far away. Though I feel like I'm all ready out of money. I spent 300 to go to a music festival at Byron Bay in New South Wales. The place is apparently stunningly beautiful and many people say it is their favorite spot in Australia. I will be there for 4 days for camping and 3 days of music with: Ben Harper (2 Nights), Xavier Rudd, John Butler Trio, State Radio, Blues Traveler, Jason Mraz, Augie March, Ash Grunwald, and so many others that I forgot. It's safe to say that I am super stoked on it and it will be some of the best days I will have here.
We are also currently planning a trip to New Zealand for 6 days. We are looking into doing some couch surfing so that will make it interesting. I just really want to go there because I know it is stunningly beautiful.
I really hope all is well with everyone back home.
Cheers.