50805 - Mother
My mother-in-law has a gift for finding "To My Daughter and Her Husband" cards.
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My mother volunteers for a no-kill animal shelter. Saturday, she was at some pet convention on the State Fairgrounds, showing some of the animals they had available for adoption.
She struck up a conversation with one young lady about the animals, taking care of them, and working for the shelter.
"You know," my mom said, "you're old enough that you could volunteer for the shelter, if you want. You're how old? 12? 13?"
"I'm 27."
"Oh."
There was a moment of silence.
"So, I guess that means you can drive yourself, too!"
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It's been a bit dangerous in my job, having so much of it come from my mother. Most of my contacts are her contacts, most of my design prowess comes from her experience - she even found the job for me in the first place. She's been great, but this setup tends to have other unintended consequences.
The other day, I got a call from a vendor on my home phone instead of my work phone.
"Hey! It's Jeff with Square D! Sorry to be calling you on this phone, but I misplaced your work phone number - so I called your mom!"
The last couple of weeks have been fun, though, because my boss' mother has been in town. She's an adorable little old lady in her late seventies, skinny, oversize rose-tinted glasses, her silver hair perpetually in pink plastic curlers, with a Dutch tendency to "shush" the letter s. She's a pro at telling embarrassing stories of her son, and I egg her on every chance I get.
The thing about his mother is, she has an uncanny knack for popping up in places you weren't expecting. I'll go to make some copies, turn around, and there's her bobbing curlers and wide eyes - "Oh, I didn't shcare you, did I?" I'll open the front door, and there she is - "I didn't shtartle you, did I?" Around corners, at the top of the stairs, in the middle of empty rooms, in closets - I keep expecting that I'll be peeling the lid off of a coffee can, and her little grey head will pop out. "I didn't shurprysh you, did I?"
No, Ma - I expected you to be hanging around in the coffee can. When are you heading home again?