(Mis)Adventures in Twilightsucks.com Forum: Gary Coleman Drama!, Hell again and the Anti-Seducer
***** out of ***** Caution Stars due to content I'm posting up here.
And no more Snicker Ads! FINALLY!
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Hey guys! Welcome back to my chronicles of the Twilightsucks.com forums! I haven't done this for a while and I'm sorry for that. I just was too lazy to actually report anything I thought was interesting.
Well, I have LOTS of things to tell you about now. And I honestly hope I don't get banned for saying this.
I like it in the forums, please don't ban me! D:
Anyways, we have a horrible thing to tell to all Avenue Q fans: Gary Coleman is dead. Yes, dear people, the man at the age of 42 died. How? By a stroke of all things. We found out through a thread and, at the start, we're pretty unhappy and focused on the star's death. At the start at least.
Someone than said they'll curbstomp kittens if anyone mentioned Death Note in such a grim thread. And guess what? Someone did. The person is known for being, excuse my French, a trolling pick-fighting dick at times. This time was no exception as they did the same thing they always did: Somehow piss someone off.
Needless to say the person, who is a Moderator, came back with a reply. And so did they. It started a brief if not intense fight with one another.
And then he got banned for spewing personal attacks against the Moderator by saying she slept with another Moderator to get the damn job as a Moderator.
No, wait, he's back in the same thread where he got banned:
Anyways, I did something really stupid concerning this situation. Remember the What Are You Thinking? Well, in the latest page, I made a reference to the drama with some incorrect information. Really, really incorrect information at a moment of utmost s tupid fuckery. Realizing my mistake, I went back to change it before I got in trouble. Luckily and thankfully, one of the Moderators did that for me and just left me off with a warning.
I'm really glad she didn't tear me a new one for that stupid action and thankful she changed it while I was away before something bad happened because of my stupidity. And I'm honestly surprised she didn't get mad at me for saying something so stupid. Really, really grateful for that.
...I'm going to need to be extra careful when on the forums now. >____>;;;
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After that, wanted some jokes to lighten my mood but felt like a sadist for some odd reason. So I went to my The Thread of LOL and You Shall be Going to Hell Soon. Just to see if there was anything new to feel bad for laughing at.
There were the awesome Pokemon jokes that keep me laughing. Yes, Pokemon. Jokes worth enough to go to hell. We can kill your childhood!
And this guy. He can kill your childhood as well.
Want to see them? Well...alright. But, again, don't get mad at me for them because you're looking at them willingly:
Those who don't know Pokemon: 1. Venusuar, 2. Rydon and 3. Pikachu. Geddit?
After those laughs, I ventured deeper into the thread to check things out. At the moment, it is a slew of jokes being made by one another and just clowning around. I noticed that the jokes are most likely original since they differ from the usual dead baby jokes we have in there.
Because a fun baby is a dead baby! What? Too much?
I decided 'oh hey! Why not make a list of my favorite jokes there!'. Here is the list but they are under cut so I don't get in trouble and stuff with others. I'm telling you this now: The jokes are rude, offensive and just mean. If you can't handle that, go to the next part of the chronicle.
What is the difference between a baby and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't cry when you put your meat in it.
There lives a white family, a Mexican family and a black family in the same apartment. One day in the middle of the afternoon, there is an earthquake and the apartment is destroyed. Only one family survived. Which family and why?
The white family. Because the parents were at work and kids were at school.
What did Hitler get for his daughter on her birthday?
An Easy-Bake-Oven.
What is the difference between a blond and the Titanic.
You knew how many men went down on the Titanic.
What did God say when he made the first black person?
"Oops, I burned one!"
Why is a blonde's I.Q the same as an anorexic's dress size?
Because it's slim to none.
What is the difference between a woman on her period, and a midget thief?
One is a cunning runt, the other has a running cunt.
We're going to hell now! Whoot!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I wanted to feed myself some knowledge now since my brain was beating me up for making it so retarded. Beating me in a way that makes Ali's beating of Fraizer look like he was being nice.
Pictured: A fight less brutal than the beat up session my brain gave to me.
So, I went out and checked to see if WolfGod made any new threads. WolfGod, you see, is kind of a celebrity in the forums thanks to his sharp wit and ability to tear Twilight a new one like no one has ever done. He just made a new thread, The Anti-Seducer, and naturally went to check it out.
In the thread, he explains how Edward is not a Seducer (or any of the sub-variants of one) like how Meyer and the fans want us to think he is.
WolfGod explains how no fan will be able to pin him down with the same variant, like a Star, Charismatic or Ideal Lover; because he is so flat and one-dimensonal, remember this is the book that is 'for people who don't read books', that it's easy to simply fill in what you want.
Seducer...
Something that lacks so much manliness, a female needs to pump more testosterone to even out the room.
Like said earlier: He ISN'T a Seducer. Far from it, my dear readers. He is, rather, the Anti-Seducer as he explains with this quote from the book he used to explain Edward's non-Seducing ways:
The Anti-Seducer: Insecure, vain and selfish, the Anti-Seducer is too caught up in themselves to be able to care for others properly. They cannot read the signals, they're ungenerous, monopolize conversations and generally make themselves a nuisance or a bore.
Sound like anyone we know?
He then explains what Edward really is: A Suffocator in which he explains with the other part of the book:
The Suffocator: Suffocators fall in love with you before you are even half-aware of their existence. The trait is desceptive - you might think they have found you overwhelming - but the fact is they suffer from an inner void, a deep well of need that cannot be filled. Never get involved with Suffocators; they are almost impossible to free yourself from without trauma. They cling to you until you are forced to pull back, whereupon they smother you with guilt. We tend to idealize a loved one, but love takes time to develop. Recognize Suffocators by how quickly they adore you. To be so admired may give a momentary boost to your ego, but deep inside you sense that their intense emotions are not related to anything you have done. Trust these instincts.
A subvariant of the Suffocator is the Doormat, a person who slavishly imitates you. Spot these types early on by seeing whether they are capable of having an idea of their own. An inability to disagree with you is a bad sign.
Basically this. Still sexy to you?
Sounds like our dear Edward, doesn't it? Hell, I bet you can pull out quotes from the series filling this to a T. My brain is now happy over the fact I've made it learn again. Yeah.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That's it from me! Tune in next time for more adventures around the forums.
And no more Snicker Ads! FINALLY!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey guys! Welcome back to my chronicles of the Twilightsucks.com forums! I haven't done this for a while and I'm sorry for that. I just was too lazy to actually report anything I thought was interesting.
Well, I have LOTS of things to tell you about now. And I honestly hope I don't get banned for saying this.
I like it in the forums, please don't ban me! D:
Anyways, we have a horrible thing to tell to all Avenue Q fans: Gary Coleman is dead. Yes, dear people, the man at the age of 42 died. How? By a stroke of all things. We found out through a thread and, at the start, we're pretty unhappy and focused on the star's death. At the start at least.
Someone than said they'll curbstomp kittens if anyone mentioned Death Note in such a grim thread. And guess what? Someone did. The person is known for being, excuse my French, a trolling pick-fighting dick at times. This time was no exception as they did the same thing they always did: Somehow piss someone off.
Needless to say the person, who is a Moderator, came back with a reply. And so did they. It started a brief if not intense fight with one another.
And then he got banned for spewing personal attacks against the Moderator by saying she slept with another Moderator to get the damn job as a Moderator.
No, wait, he's back in the same thread where he got banned:
Anyways, I did something really stupid concerning this situation. Remember the What Are You Thinking? Well, in the latest page, I made a reference to the drama with some incorrect information. Really, really incorrect information at a moment of utmost s tupid fuckery. Realizing my mistake, I went back to change it before I got in trouble. Luckily and thankfully, one of the Moderators did that for me and just left me off with a warning.
I'm really glad she didn't tear me a new one for that stupid action and thankful she changed it while I was away before something bad happened because of my stupidity. And I'm honestly surprised she didn't get mad at me for saying something so stupid. Really, really grateful for that.
...I'm going to need to be extra careful when on the forums now. >____>;;;
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After that, wanted some jokes to lighten my mood but felt like a sadist for some odd reason. So I went to my The Thread of LOL and You Shall be Going to Hell Soon. Just to see if there was anything new to feel bad for laughing at.
There were the awesome Pokemon jokes that keep me laughing. Yes, Pokemon. Jokes worth enough to go to hell. We can kill your childhood!
And this guy. He can kill your childhood as well.
Want to see them? Well...alright. But, again, don't get mad at me for them because you're looking at them willingly:
Those who don't know Pokemon: 1. Venusuar, 2. Rydon and 3. Pikachu. Geddit?
After those laughs, I ventured deeper into the thread to check things out. At the moment, it is a slew of jokes being made by one another and just clowning around. I noticed that the jokes are most likely original since they differ from the usual dead baby jokes we have in there.
Because a fun baby is a dead baby! What? Too much?
I decided 'oh hey! Why not make a list of my favorite jokes there!'. Here is the list but they are under cut so I don't get in trouble and stuff with others. I'm telling you this now: The jokes are rude, offensive and just mean. If you can't handle that, go to the next part of the chronicle.
What is the difference between a baby and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't cry when you put your meat in it.
There lives a white family, a Mexican family and a black family in the same apartment. One day in the middle of the afternoon, there is an earthquake and the apartment is destroyed. Only one family survived. Which family and why?
The white family. Because the parents were at work and kids were at school.
What did Hitler get for his daughter on her birthday?
An Easy-Bake-Oven.
What is the difference between a blond and the Titanic.
You knew how many men went down on the Titanic.
What did God say when he made the first black person?
"Oops, I burned one!"
Why is a blonde's I.Q the same as an anorexic's dress size?
Because it's slim to none.
What is the difference between a woman on her period, and a midget thief?
One is a cunning runt, the other has a running cunt.
We're going to hell now! Whoot!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I wanted to feed myself some knowledge now since my brain was beating me up for making it so retarded. Beating me in a way that makes Ali's beating of Fraizer look like he was being nice.
Pictured: A fight less brutal than the beat up session my brain gave to me.
So, I went out and checked to see if WolfGod made any new threads. WolfGod, you see, is kind of a celebrity in the forums thanks to his sharp wit and ability to tear Twilight a new one like no one has ever done. He just made a new thread, The Anti-Seducer, and naturally went to check it out.
In the thread, he explains how Edward is not a Seducer (or any of the sub-variants of one) like how Meyer and the fans want us to think he is.
WolfGod explains how no fan will be able to pin him down with the same variant, like a Star, Charismatic or Ideal Lover; because he is so flat and one-dimensonal, remember this is the book that is 'for people who don't read books', that it's easy to simply fill in what you want.
Seducer...
Something that lacks so much manliness, a female needs to pump more testosterone to even out the room.
Like said earlier: He ISN'T a Seducer. Far from it, my dear readers. He is, rather, the Anti-Seducer as he explains with this quote from the book he used to explain Edward's non-Seducing ways:
The Anti-Seducer: Insecure, vain and selfish, the Anti-Seducer is too caught up in themselves to be able to care for others properly. They cannot read the signals, they're ungenerous, monopolize conversations and generally make themselves a nuisance or a bore.
Sound like anyone we know?
He then explains what Edward really is: A Suffocator in which he explains with the other part of the book:
The Suffocator: Suffocators fall in love with you before you are even half-aware of their existence. The trait is desceptive - you might think they have found you overwhelming - but the fact is they suffer from an inner void, a deep well of need that cannot be filled. Never get involved with Suffocators; they are almost impossible to free yourself from without trauma. They cling to you until you are forced to pull back, whereupon they smother you with guilt. We tend to idealize a loved one, but love takes time to develop. Recognize Suffocators by how quickly they adore you. To be so admired may give a momentary boost to your ego, but deep inside you sense that their intense emotions are not related to anything you have done. Trust these instincts.
A subvariant of the Suffocator is the Doormat, a person who slavishly imitates you. Spot these types early on by seeing whether they are capable of having an idea of their own. An inability to disagree with you is a bad sign.
Basically this. Still sexy to you?
Sounds like our dear Edward, doesn't it? Hell, I bet you can pull out quotes from the series filling this to a T. My brain is now happy over the fact I've made it learn again. Yeah.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That's it from me! Tune in next time for more adventures around the forums.