goodbye?
I told ryan i was going to kill myself and i truly was by taking ten oxycontins, then as much as i hope it would stop him from being hurt by my foolishness anymore, then i realized that it would hurt him more if i did, so i decided not to, but now i have no reason to not to, ryan hates me again, he has once again ignored me on his AIM so now i know that it will no longer hurt him, i feel like i must do this, this is something to accend to the next life, maybe become what i want, maybe what i hate, i have loved ryan and ryan only and it only hurt him, i can't stop loving him, i never will, this is the only way to stop form loving him, and to help him be happy, my love hurt him, so now in a last show of true love and devotion i shall end the pain which i cause by ending me loving him the only way i know how. You were all so kind, good bye.