Friends...

[happybuddha]

How come when i finally do something right, i am not sure what i did but appearently something to get ryan back, he seemed farther away than he ever could be. He barely said a thing to me today, i truly felt like he hated me, I love him to death, he is my best friend, yet today he made me feel like he could truly care less, is he only talking to me nicely because he wants a few more things before he finally drops the bomb which will finally kill me? I don't know, i am truly so scared about it, he is truly my best friend he is closer to me than anyone ever had or ever will be, he is closer to me than eny b/f ever will be, we all have people in our lives like that, he is mine, yet today he made me feel like he doesn't want to be that, i truly need him, i understand i screwed up by going to franks, and i can't apologize enough for that, I truly can't, i would do anything to go back to way things were before i screwed it all up, I love ryan because he is my best friend, he means more to me than anyone ever will, i truly can't live without my best friend there for me, but i wish i only knew if he loved me in the same way, Ryan if you are reading this, please tell me where we stand as friends now, i don't think i can live without my best friend there for me, and that is what you are, my best friend, and i will do anything it takes just to make things just a little like it used to be, just tell me what i have to do, an btw i truly think you looked really hot tonight with that hair:) well i really hope you reply soon, btw if i get a dog like andrea's what should i name it?
Goodbye All,
Aaron