(no subject)
i dont know what happened tonite, but something seriously set something off in me and really got me to thinking...
what is maturity? and when do we reach that point? i mean, i know that there are certain things that people expect of "mature" people, and to most people, if not all of the population, you arent really mature until you possess these qualities. i really dont know what im saying right now. i guess im just confused...about a lot of stuff. i mean, im 22. i feel like people expect certain things from me. but what if im not ready yet. what if im not ready to be an adult. what if im not ready to be "mature", or what everyone else would consider to be mature. i consider myself mature. but in the grand scheme of things, does that even matter. isnt it the "mature" thats socially acceptable that matters. just because i fit into a certain mold, and dont say certain things, or do certain things, or wear certain things, does that make me not mature? like when do we reach that point, and what do i have to do to make it there? does being mature mean forgetting about the concerts? or not rocking rainbow toesocks with adidas? does it mean giving up on pigtails and jelly bracelets? forgetting about carebears and concert tees? does it mean putting all the good times we had when all of this was socially acceptable in the back of our minds, and giving up on ever having that again...WISHING we could go back...because it was so much easier then to be ourselves? what the hell do we have to do? this is not the makings of a "mature" adult, all of these things. but what if thats you? does becoming a "mature" adult mean giving up on who we are, and conforming to be considered "mature" because thats what we think we should be just because we reach a certain age, and feel like thats what people expect? if being an adult, and a "mature" one at that means giving up on all these things we love, and being in debt, and giving up on ourselves, and being confused, how much of a good thing can this really be? this growing up thing? yet we, or maybe just me, try so hard to achieve it because we think its what we SHOULD do? but isnt staying true to ourselves more important? i really dont know.
what is maturity? and when do we reach that point? i mean, i know that there are certain things that people expect of "mature" people, and to most people, if not all of the population, you arent really mature until you possess these qualities. i really dont know what im saying right now. i guess im just confused...about a lot of stuff. i mean, im 22. i feel like people expect certain things from me. but what if im not ready yet. what if im not ready to be an adult. what if im not ready to be "mature", or what everyone else would consider to be mature. i consider myself mature. but in the grand scheme of things, does that even matter. isnt it the "mature" thats socially acceptable that matters. just because i fit into a certain mold, and dont say certain things, or do certain things, or wear certain things, does that make me not mature? like when do we reach that point, and what do i have to do to make it there? does being mature mean forgetting about the concerts? or not rocking rainbow toesocks with adidas? does it mean giving up on pigtails and jelly bracelets? forgetting about carebears and concert tees? does it mean putting all the good times we had when all of this was socially acceptable in the back of our minds, and giving up on ever having that again...WISHING we could go back...because it was so much easier then to be ourselves? what the hell do we have to do? this is not the makings of a "mature" adult, all of these things. but what if thats you? does becoming a "mature" adult mean giving up on who we are, and conforming to be considered "mature" because thats what we think we should be just because we reach a certain age, and feel like thats what people expect? if being an adult, and a "mature" one at that means giving up on all these things we love, and being in debt, and giving up on ourselves, and being confused, how much of a good thing can this really be? this growing up thing? yet we, or maybe just me, try so hard to achieve it because we think its what we SHOULD do? but isnt staying true to ourselves more important? i really dont know.