(no subject)
LUNCH BREAAAK
As I said last entry, this will be a happier entry fer real.
Yesterday we celebrated Drew/MK's birthdays. There was cake and presents and good times. And really good football on too. The Titan's won their game and are still number 1 in the AFC South! Woohoo! That night I chilled with Drew, watched Metalocalypse (which I am in love with. That show is hilarious beyond all reason.), and just generally dicked around.
Today I kinda screwed up because I missed my physical therapy appointment. Didn't set my alarm cuz I was expecting Dad to wake me up. Which he should've because he should've been up too. Whatever. Then I ate cheesecake, watched NFL highlights with Dad, and said good bye to Drew and him as they both went to the city (Dad for work, Drew to go back to skool). Then, well, school for me! I've done a lot. One history assignment, and like, 5 LA assignments. And at least 3 of those were ones I was struggling with/were really long. I had a good shot of BSing skillz for a bit there so I was able to push through some of the major ones holding me back. Nice. I've taken 20 mg of the Dexedrine ER this time and it's working much better. It's stronger, which is nice, but I'm not a wreck like I was with regular Dexedrine. Plus it's still working after 3 hours, whereas 10 mg of both Dexedrine and Dexedrine ER wore off at 3 hours. After I finish my sammich, I'll go back to work, but not entirely sure on what. Maybe LA, since I'm on a roll. Or possibly Science because I've got a writing assignment I need to do in there that I think I'm in the mood for. Hooray productivity! ^_________^
I suppose I should speak of the stuff I did on Saturday before it turned fail, because it was a very good day. Drew, Eric Palmer, me, and Ashley (friend of Drew and semi-almost-girlfriend of Eric) went to Little 5 Points to celebrate Drew's birthday. We ate lunch at Ali Baba's, a Turkish restaurant where Drew is the pet white-boy-who-speaks-Turkish. XD Very good food and very good hookah. Significantly buzzed from hookah, we perused L5P. We stopped in several shops, including the new goth store, Le Petite Morte. It's freaking awesome and the proprietor is so black metal it hurts. XD Drew bought a shirt that had Baphomet on the front. I find it to very nice and frankly pretty, but you know, most people don't see things like I do. XD He also bought a ritual dagger for his Satanic rituals at Crystal Blue. (Oh yeah. Drew, despite being an atheist, does Satanic rituals. He says that even though he knows it's bogus it soothes and calms him. Sort of like meditation but with more chanting, black, and evil.) It's really cool. It's about 6-8 inches long with a silver hilt wrapped in black leather on the grip. On the cross-guard there is an inverted pentagram with the Horned God hanging upside down. The sigil looks like it's made of gnarled wire and it's totally awesome. Included was a very nice black leather sheath. Best part is that I found it for him. X33 In short, it was a very good day. And then, uh, DND. Which is always a good time.
So there you go. Now you must excuse me, there are maidens to slay, dungeons to loot so I must be off. I mean, I need to go back to skool.
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6:10 PM EDIT:
Well, I have nothing better to do and my dexedrine is still pushin' so I guess I'll write some more in here!
After I finished the first part of this I was like "... MUST GET BACK ON TRAIN OF THOUGHT OH DAMN THIS IS HARD" so I switched subjects and did a whole bunch of Japanese. Unfortunately a few of those assignments I did wrong before I realized it because I didn't realize that they way the days of the week were listed was M-T-W-TH-F-SA-SUN and not SUN-M-T-W-TH-F-SA. Sooo my days were all one off. Oh well. They were tiny assignments and I caught that before I turned in anything else. I need to start practicing Japanese once a day again. I've forgotten most of the M/R/T hiragana. ^^;; Now I've got to get G/B/P/Z down and they are all identical to K/S/H/T (I think those ones. See? I really need to study moar.) except for some tiny squiggles. Also need to work on being to read by sight so I don't have to sit there are romanize each word in order to read it.
Augh I'm so happy this medicine works. You have no idea. I got 5 whole hours of school done today. That's just unheard of for me. And I'm only mildly jittery, not cracked out at all. And still have repressed appetite, but not that ridiculous disgust at the idea of eating. Which rules. I could probably work on school more, but I'm going to reward myself after a hard day's work by just chillin'. *dances*
Alas, I do have a few more somber things to speak of. I know this is supposed to be a happy entry, but I feel the need to put them down. My mom came in today and was like "so was dad weird dis morning 2???" And I was like "a lil bit lol. ):" And we talked about how fscked up (pronounced fuh-ss-cked) Dad has been recently. I mean, he hasn't been the same since about December (especially noticeable downfall after May), but lately it's just gotten weird. And Drew is refusing to come home anymore after AWA because Dad is being so awful to him again. So Mom has decided we need to find out what's wrong with Dad and force him to go to Dr. B. First me and Mom need to get an appointment with Dr. B to tell him everything that's been going on with Dad before he goes to see him. Because well, the bipolar catch phrase is "I don't have a problem!! YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!!" and one of the reasons it's so hard to treat is because they usually won't reveal even half of the truth of how things are actually going, mostly because they're delusional to some degree or another. Soooo my job in that meeting is to discuss how he acts around me, Drew, and when Mom's not around- mornings and late nights when he comes and talks to me- in addition to discussing the whole thing about his favoritism towards me. Mom will discuss how he is around her, his immense hatred for Drew (Okay, it's not even a disliking. It's hate. It really is.), and other subtle things I may have missed. Ohhh boy. This may be one of those make or break things for Dad. We'll see. It'll be... interesting... for sure.
A thought of interest. I am bipolar, but I never really suffered from the delusion that so many do. It wasn't like my bipolar was particularly mild either. I had extremely severe depression and notable mania. (I am Type 2 Bipolar which means my depression is worse than my mania to begin with, but never the less I still had mania.) I had the rages, the hyperactivity, the racing thoughts, the brooding, the insomnia/hypersomnia, mood swings, the cycling... Everything except for the delusions. Sure I had irrational thoughts, but I never actually believed them. I just thought about them. Most fascinating indeed.
ANYWAY. Um, let's see... I don't know if I have anything else to talk about. XD; Not sure what I'll do after this though. Dayum. Well, I'm off.
PS: Holy shit this was a long ass entry.
As I said last entry, this will be a happier entry fer real.
Yesterday we celebrated Drew/MK's birthdays. There was cake and presents and good times. And really good football on too. The Titan's won their game and are still number 1 in the AFC South! Woohoo! That night I chilled with Drew, watched Metalocalypse (which I am in love with. That show is hilarious beyond all reason.), and just generally dicked around.
Today I kinda screwed up because I missed my physical therapy appointment. Didn't set my alarm cuz I was expecting Dad to wake me up. Which he should've because he should've been up too. Whatever. Then I ate cheesecake, watched NFL highlights with Dad, and said good bye to Drew and him as they both went to the city (Dad for work, Drew to go back to skool). Then, well, school for me! I've done a lot. One history assignment, and like, 5 LA assignments. And at least 3 of those were ones I was struggling with/were really long. I had a good shot of BSing skillz for a bit there so I was able to push through some of the major ones holding me back. Nice. I've taken 20 mg of the Dexedrine ER this time and it's working much better. It's stronger, which is nice, but I'm not a wreck like I was with regular Dexedrine. Plus it's still working after 3 hours, whereas 10 mg of both Dexedrine and Dexedrine ER wore off at 3 hours. After I finish my sammich, I'll go back to work, but not entirely sure on what. Maybe LA, since I'm on a roll. Or possibly Science because I've got a writing assignment I need to do in there that I think I'm in the mood for. Hooray productivity! ^_________^
I suppose I should speak of the stuff I did on Saturday before it turned fail, because it was a very good day. Drew, Eric Palmer, me, and Ashley (friend of Drew and semi-almost-girlfriend of Eric) went to Little 5 Points to celebrate Drew's birthday. We ate lunch at Ali Baba's, a Turkish restaurant where Drew is the pet white-boy-who-speaks-Turkish. XD Very good food and very good hookah. Significantly buzzed from hookah, we perused L5P. We stopped in several shops, including the new goth store, Le Petite Morte. It's freaking awesome and the proprietor is so black metal it hurts. XD Drew bought a shirt that had Baphomet on the front. I find it to very nice and frankly pretty, but you know, most people don't see things like I do. XD He also bought a ritual dagger for his Satanic rituals at Crystal Blue. (Oh yeah. Drew, despite being an atheist, does Satanic rituals. He says that even though he knows it's bogus it soothes and calms him. Sort of like meditation but with more chanting, black, and evil.) It's really cool. It's about 6-8 inches long with a silver hilt wrapped in black leather on the grip. On the cross-guard there is an inverted pentagram with the Horned God hanging upside down. The sigil looks like it's made of gnarled wire and it's totally awesome. Included was a very nice black leather sheath. Best part is that I found it for him. X33 In short, it was a very good day. And then, uh, DND. Which is always a good time.
So there you go. Now you must excuse me, there are maidens to slay, dungeons to loot so I must be off. I mean, I need to go back to skool.
==========
6:10 PM EDIT:
Well, I have nothing better to do and my dexedrine is still pushin' so I guess I'll write some more in here!
After I finished the first part of this I was like "... MUST GET BACK ON TRAIN OF THOUGHT OH DAMN THIS IS HARD" so I switched subjects and did a whole bunch of Japanese. Unfortunately a few of those assignments I did wrong before I realized it because I didn't realize that they way the days of the week were listed was M-T-W-TH-F-SA-SUN and not SUN-M-T-W-TH-F-SA. Sooo my days were all one off. Oh well. They were tiny assignments and I caught that before I turned in anything else. I need to start practicing Japanese once a day again. I've forgotten most of the M/R/T hiragana. ^^;; Now I've got to get G/B/P/Z down and they are all identical to K/S/H/T (I think those ones. See? I really need to study moar.) except for some tiny squiggles. Also need to work on being to read by sight so I don't have to sit there are romanize each word in order to read it.
Augh I'm so happy this medicine works. You have no idea. I got 5 whole hours of school done today. That's just unheard of for me. And I'm only mildly jittery, not cracked out at all. And still have repressed appetite, but not that ridiculous disgust at the idea of eating. Which rules. I could probably work on school more, but I'm going to reward myself after a hard day's work by just chillin'. *dances*
Alas, I do have a few more somber things to speak of. I know this is supposed to be a happy entry, but I feel the need to put them down. My mom came in today and was like "so was dad weird dis morning 2???" And I was like "a lil bit lol. ):" And we talked about how fscked up (pronounced fuh-ss-cked) Dad has been recently. I mean, he hasn't been the same since about December (especially noticeable downfall after May), but lately it's just gotten weird. And Drew is refusing to come home anymore after AWA because Dad is being so awful to him again. So Mom has decided we need to find out what's wrong with Dad and force him to go to Dr. B. First me and Mom need to get an appointment with Dr. B to tell him everything that's been going on with Dad before he goes to see him. Because well, the bipolar catch phrase is "I don't have a problem!! YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!!" and one of the reasons it's so hard to treat is because they usually won't reveal even half of the truth of how things are actually going, mostly because they're delusional to some degree or another. Soooo my job in that meeting is to discuss how he acts around me, Drew, and when Mom's not around- mornings and late nights when he comes and talks to me- in addition to discussing the whole thing about his favoritism towards me. Mom will discuss how he is around her, his immense hatred for Drew (Okay, it's not even a disliking. It's hate. It really is.), and other subtle things I may have missed. Ohhh boy. This may be one of those make or break things for Dad. We'll see. It'll be... interesting... for sure.
A thought of interest. I am bipolar, but I never really suffered from the delusion that so many do. It wasn't like my bipolar was particularly mild either. I had extremely severe depression and notable mania. (I am Type 2 Bipolar which means my depression is worse than my mania to begin with, but never the less I still had mania.) I had the rages, the hyperactivity, the racing thoughts, the brooding, the insomnia/hypersomnia, mood swings, the cycling... Everything except for the delusions. Sure I had irrational thoughts, but I never actually believed them. I just thought about them. Most fascinating indeed.
ANYWAY. Um, let's see... I don't know if I have anything else to talk about. XD; Not sure what I'll do after this though. Dayum. Well, I'm off.
PS: Holy shit this was a long ass entry.