*insert title here*
Those of you who are reading this have probably seen one of my instant messenger titles saying to check here for details on why I'm not going to be chatting tonight.
In short? I'm barely conscious right now, trying not to cry because I'm exhausted mentally and physically because I can't sleep worth a damn and because I'm not feeling well again.
...well, scratch the "trying not to cry" part because I've started to and probably will not stop until I'm asleep.
I'm so fucking tired and I shouldn't be.
Is there something wrong with me that's making me like this?
I almost started crying in the damn store at the mall with Mom and Chibi-Kit. Would have if I hadn't stomped it down and gritted my teeth. I think Mom and Dad know something's wrong because I was almost ready to cry out in the living room as I walked past the couch on my way to my room.
I just want this to stop.
On a semi-lighter note, I have an application that I'll fill out once I wake up, go to the mall again tomorrow with my birth certificate and get my Photo ID card, apply for this job and hope to any GOD out there who doesn't want to mock me right now and kick me in the ribs while I'm down that I'll get this job and finally.... I don't know, have something to wake up to each morning other than waiting around for my friends to come online because I have nothing else to do and nowhere else to go.
I think a big part of it is that I'm lonely without people to hang out with, even though I'm used to being by myself. I think I'm at a point where I'm starting to need to be with someone to ease the loneliness.
Other than me going emo, the only other news is that I picked up $40 worth of manga at my local Barnes and Noble:
Fruits Basket #14
Voices of a Distant Star
Glass Wings
Megatokyo #4
I'm leaving now, I'm going to go pass out from exhaustion and whatever else is wrong with me.
See you.
In short? I'm barely conscious right now, trying not to cry because I'm exhausted mentally and physically because I can't sleep worth a damn and because I'm not feeling well again.
...well, scratch the "trying not to cry" part because I've started to and probably will not stop until I'm asleep.
I'm so fucking tired and I shouldn't be.
Is there something wrong with me that's making me like this?
I almost started crying in the damn store at the mall with Mom and Chibi-Kit. Would have if I hadn't stomped it down and gritted my teeth. I think Mom and Dad know something's wrong because I was almost ready to cry out in the living room as I walked past the couch on my way to my room.
I just want this to stop.
On a semi-lighter note, I have an application that I'll fill out once I wake up, go to the mall again tomorrow with my birth certificate and get my Photo ID card, apply for this job and hope to any GOD out there who doesn't want to mock me right now and kick me in the ribs while I'm down that I'll get this job and finally.... I don't know, have something to wake up to each morning other than waiting around for my friends to come online because I have nothing else to do and nowhere else to go.
I think a big part of it is that I'm lonely without people to hang out with, even though I'm used to being by myself. I think I'm at a point where I'm starting to need to be with someone to ease the loneliness.
Other than me going emo, the only other news is that I picked up $40 worth of manga at my local Barnes and Noble:
Fruits Basket #14
Voices of a Distant Star
Glass Wings
Megatokyo #4
I'm leaving now, I'm going to go pass out from exhaustion and whatever else is wrong with me.
See you.