(no subject)
This is going to be one of my few public entries because it's something I want everyone to see, even if they aren't on my friends list. Odds are I'll become very anxious while writing it, but I believe it's something I need to do.
I want to apologize to everyone, and yes, I do mean everyone since I don't think there's a person I'm not guilty of doing this to. I know it's a bit late for me to be saying this, and in some cases it's too late, but better said that never said at all.
I've been so self centered lately and it took some conversations and some serious thinking to realize it. I got into a lot of arguments with people about how people weren't doing enough to help me out with my problems. But after really thinking about it, I realized a lot of people were doing more than enough to help me. I guess I just ignored the one main people thing were doing that kept me going: just being there for me and caring about what happened to me. I think at the time I was just frustrated that very little was being done so I ended up taking it out on the people who were trying to help but didn't know what to do. The fear and the frustration of everyone else just got to me and I started convincing myself that no one could help me and that I was alone in it all. I didn't see the people around me trying to help out; I just put myself in my own little world. I finally realized I did need that help and with a lot of people, it was gone. I really apologize for doing that, it wasn't something I should have done. Thanks to everyone who did try to help me at one point and special thanks to the people who put up with all the way through it and are still there. I'll try to be a little less self centered with it and try to keep more hope to keep me positive.
I really hope this makes sense as to what I'm trying to say; it made more sense in my head then putting it down here.
I want to apologize to everyone, and yes, I do mean everyone since I don't think there's a person I'm not guilty of doing this to. I know it's a bit late for me to be saying this, and in some cases it's too late, but better said that never said at all.
I've been so self centered lately and it took some conversations and some serious thinking to realize it. I got into a lot of arguments with people about how people weren't doing enough to help me out with my problems. But after really thinking about it, I realized a lot of people were doing more than enough to help me. I guess I just ignored the one main people thing were doing that kept me going: just being there for me and caring about what happened to me. I think at the time I was just frustrated that very little was being done so I ended up taking it out on the people who were trying to help but didn't know what to do. The fear and the frustration of everyone else just got to me and I started convincing myself that no one could help me and that I was alone in it all. I didn't see the people around me trying to help out; I just put myself in my own little world. I finally realized I did need that help and with a lot of people, it was gone. I really apologize for doing that, it wasn't something I should have done. Thanks to everyone who did try to help me at one point and special thanks to the people who put up with all the way through it and are still there. I'll try to be a little less self centered with it and try to keep more hope to keep me positive.
I really hope this makes sense as to what I'm trying to say; it made more sense in my head then putting it down here.