Konfusion with a "K"
I find it hard to believe how much trouble this livehjournal may have brought me. How could I have known things I wrote two years ago or more would come to effect my reality today? What I can best describe as an exercise in creative writing has become my persona. This lj is not who I am. It was an effort to appease a few people. Mostly one person. Sometimes saying what one person wants to hear when they are the only one to read it seems like a good idea. And what was once a means to vent has become a chain. I guess a public journal can be viewed by the public. I remember why I stopped updating this. I never thought it would bring me more trouble, Or tilt another person's view of me. I'm not the same person who wrote these updates. Even that person that wrote these updates didn't mean them when he wrote them. Is anyone ever the person they were two years ago? I've had so many great and terrible life changing events since then. So many events.
Tina, I know you've been here. Lizzy told me. I'm not sure if you will bother to check here again. This may be for only me. A means of venting once again. Perhaps this lj still serves a purpose. Im not a psycho........... I believe I referred to myself as a sociopath, which is different, "people. don't cry over psychos." Why would you cry over me? I can't quite remember everything I've wrote in here and I don't really want to bother to read everything I have wrote. Apparently you've done that for me. I guess I was foolish to use "HannibalO" as my login name and not think it could come back to me eventually. Why wont you see me in person? Whats the worse that could happen? Im saddened to think you mite not read this. Then again, maybe it is for the best. I just wanted an explanation and some empathy.
Tina, I know you've been here. Lizzy told me. I'm not sure if you will bother to check here again. This may be for only me. A means of venting once again. Perhaps this lj still serves a purpose. Im not a psycho........... I believe I referred to myself as a sociopath, which is different, "people. don't cry over psychos." Why would you cry over me? I can't quite remember everything I've wrote in here and I don't really want to bother to read everything I have wrote. Apparently you've done that for me. I guess I was foolish to use "HannibalO" as my login name and not think it could come back to me eventually. Why wont you see me in person? Whats the worse that could happen? Im saddened to think you mite not read this. Then again, maybe it is for the best. I just wanted an explanation and some empathy.