(no subject)
i am wearing especially grumpy pants right now. i think i'm pulling a "something is really bothering me but i'm pretending that it isn't so i actually have no idea what it is that's bothering me." and that doesn't make me happy. and i think a lack of protien for the past few days might make me grumpy, or run down at least. i want to cry and scream and be by myself and have everyone around me and run away all at the same time. i miss having someone know that something is wrong even when i insist that everything is fine.
and everybody's dying. all of my mom's friends are dying. my mom told me today that liz campbell (this lady has an incredibly dirty mind and is incredibly rude and it's so funny and wonderful and i love her)has uncurable cancer. that makes her and georgia queen's husband (they are the sweetest couple in the world) and my uncle is sick (they say that he's not in danger of dying yet, but i'm scared). why isn't everyone well? why am i so fucking restless? why am i so fucking grumpy? why can't i concentrate on anything?
i want to go horseback riding. this is the type of mood that only something that reaches down as deep inside me as riding does can help. or a hug, a good cry, some good food, and sleeping for days.
and everybody's dying. all of my mom's friends are dying. my mom told me today that liz campbell (this lady has an incredibly dirty mind and is incredibly rude and it's so funny and wonderful and i love her)has uncurable cancer. that makes her and georgia queen's husband (they are the sweetest couple in the world) and my uncle is sick (they say that he's not in danger of dying yet, but i'm scared). why isn't everyone well? why am i so fucking restless? why am i so fucking grumpy? why can't i concentrate on anything?
i want to go horseback riding. this is the type of mood that only something that reaches down as deep inside me as riding does can help. or a hug, a good cry, some good food, and sleeping for days.