(no subject)
So you think you know me. You read this, so you must know something or why would you still be reading? Some seem to be quite confused about exactly who I am, what I stand for, where I am now, and where I'm goin(or hoping I'm going) with my future. This is all too bad. I guess frankly I'm more amused that you think you know what I spend all my time doing. It makes me wonder what you all really do think of me, but I'm also at that point in my life where I see most of that no longer having any significance to my life. My past isn't what matters so much any more. Sure it's what's gotten me here in West Virginia. Am I proud of everything in my past? No way. But who really is. Here I am, now 19, sitting at my desk, pounding down on all these small letters, to look over in the mirror and try to explain to all of the unknowing exactly what I see, exactly who I am. I can honestly say that I'm still insecure, even about the littlest of things. I spent years of my life doing something that I question now several times daily, if I ever should of really been doing at all. I did something that quite franly, none of you will ever understand. I did something that was a part of my life everyday for 15 years. It was me. It was what people knew me as. It was my identity, it was my body, it was my skin. And now it's gone.
I can honestly say that to those who have invested their time in me, I've been beyond the definition of a good friend. I'll admit it, I've got a temper, but once blown cool, am the most compassionate, and thoughtful person I know. For those I perfer to call friends I value with almost as much entity as my own life. And those who know that they are, know all this.
I can honestly say that I will continously fear that my lack of a father for the better part of my life will leave my lone and old. Missing out on the things I believe he could of instilled in me despite his lack of self-control, and years of recklessness, I think have hindered me to fully embrace what it is to love another.
I can honestly say that I with each drop of red hot blood running through my body, I love my mom. She's given everything to me she ever could, and I gratefully attribute every positive thing I've ever accomplished to her.
I can honestly say that this is me. Although similar to many others, I strongly believe in my own personal greatness, just as every person should. Without that, one can't go too far.
College has changed me into a person that some may not like. But more now than ever before I am myself. I do what I want, when I want, and need to do it. And as I can now step back and see myself finally falling into myself, I find myself each day becoming more and more comfortable with the person am I, and the successful woman I am growing up to be.
I know who I am, do you know who you are? Do you know who you really are? Or are you just lying to make yourself feel better about what you aren't?
I can honestly say that to those who have invested their time in me, I've been beyond the definition of a good friend. I'll admit it, I've got a temper, but once blown cool, am the most compassionate, and thoughtful person I know. For those I perfer to call friends I value with almost as much entity as my own life. And those who know that they are, know all this.
I can honestly say that I will continously fear that my lack of a father for the better part of my life will leave my lone and old. Missing out on the things I believe he could of instilled in me despite his lack of self-control, and years of recklessness, I think have hindered me to fully embrace what it is to love another.
I can honestly say that I with each drop of red hot blood running through my body, I love my mom. She's given everything to me she ever could, and I gratefully attribute every positive thing I've ever accomplished to her.
I can honestly say that this is me. Although similar to many others, I strongly believe in my own personal greatness, just as every person should. Without that, one can't go too far.
College has changed me into a person that some may not like. But more now than ever before I am myself. I do what I want, when I want, and need to do it. And as I can now step back and see myself finally falling into myself, I find myself each day becoming more and more comfortable with the person am I, and the successful woman I am growing up to be.
I know who I am, do you know who you are? Do you know who you really are? Or are you just lying to make yourself feel better about what you aren't?