RPF--The Roles We Play
When Hugh’s mood took a nose-dive, it could be felt on set. While it wasn’t a common occurrence, it made it feel as if a slight fog hovered over the entire crew, urging them to tread lightly if they bumped into him off camera. Many noticed his depression was thickly painted on his face. The worry lines across his brow were prominent; his temple pulsing as he absentmindedly grits his teeth. The eyes that have made so many swoon spoke volumes of his mental and physical exhaustion. Being on set so often to complete such a heavy shooting schedule was getting to him. Things had become so bad with Jo that he hadn’t spoken to her in at least a month. He had stopped counting the days a while ago. The star of one of the most popular television series in the United States wasn’t happy. Hugh Laurie could be the poster boy for the phrase: Money doesn’t buy happiness. It was the intangible that he craved so badly. He could buy motorcycles, vintage cars or instruments all day long, but he knew it wouldn’t help him. Becoming his character wasn’t something that he had signed up for, but it was incredible how well he could relate to House on days like this after nearly seven years of portraying him.
Lisa usually detected his mood long before the rest of them did. When his smile of greeting to her didn’t quite meet his eyes, she knew. And sadly, it wasn’t one of the more common days where an almost chipper Mr. Laurie gave her the smile that made her knees week. Something was off, and she knew. That’s how they were. Lisa’s pain became Hugh’s and his became hers. Their connection was casually straddling the line between friends and lovers and it had been for a long time. Maybe that was Lisa’s subconscious reason for avoiding dating. Because sometimes when their eyes met, she felt more and she knew he did too. They stood next to a tall wall, the forbidden lying just on the other side. Hugh was tall enough to hoist himself up and over it if he wanted, but Lisa could only make it across with his assistance. They had been sorely tempted when they shot the opener for this season a few months ago. Even though it was acting and they were doing their job, an intense longing for the other plagued them. As they moved against each other to stage the faux act, skin to skin, both of their reactions were obvious to the other. Hugh’s erection pressed firmly against her pelvis as his heavy breath caught in his throat. Lisa’s body shivered under his touch, her nude colored panties growing damp with her want. It wasn’t easy, but they had resisted. For the sake of everyone involved.
A big scene was being shot in Cuddy’s office that involved most of the cast. It was the seventh take because Hugh kept stumbling over his line. The others were being patient with him because all of them had been there at least once in their career. Lisa’s eyes flicked up and met his gaze just before the take started. A painful, beautiful heat stirred as they locked eyes for a beat longer than necessary. She could clearly see that he was hurting and she smelled trouble on the horizon. Three more takes and many obscenities later, they got through the scene without a hitch. And just like that, he was gone. “Damn him with his long legs,” she thought to herself as she scanned the set for him, not seeing the tall, handsome man she was searching for. After a quick change into her street clothes, Lisa made her way towards his dressing room. Her heart grew heavier with each step.
He always had the door locked. Always. He said he was afraid that someone low on the ladder of the crew would snatch his belongings to sell on Ebay, but she knew otherwise. Hugh was a very private person. He simply didn’t like to be bothered most days, but he usually let her in. Both physically and emotionally. She hoped that she could get him to actually talk about whatever was bothering him, because a few more days like this one on set would start to piss everyone off. Lisa knocked slightly on the door and when he opened it she gave him a soft smile. “Hey.”
The corners of his mouth twitched into the tiniest, fake smile. “Hi,” he replied, moving to the side to usher her in. She found her way to her usual place on his couch as he closed the door. When he turned back around to face her, his actual mood was written on his features. Lisa felt as if a boulder rested heavily in her stomach. She ached for him, for whatever it was that had him so low. He took his place on the couch and they sat there for a moment. Hugh knowing what she wanted to say. Lisa knowing that he knew. Once she had worked up the courage, she turned her head to look at him, needing to know what had the usually cheery man in his current state.
“You gonna tell me what’s bothering you?” she asked, her eyes staying on his tense form.
“It’s nothing,” he lied, facing forward with his chin propped up on his hand. He was hoping that she would believe him and at the same time knowing that she wouldn’t. That was something that he both loved and hated about her.
“I know better,” she paused, subconsciously biting her lower lip, searching for the right words to say. Her hand reached out to touch his forearm in support. “Please. Talk to me, Hugh,” she said softly, her thumb rubbing over the bare skin of his arm. He remained silent for a bit, thinking, pondering how he could explain it to her. Everything. It seemed meaningless and impossible. The thing that bothered him most about the situation was that it made him feel like a failure. While his professional life was going smoothly, his personal life had hit a bump and his balance was wavering.
He cleared his throat before speaking, still unable to look at her. “I’m…” he took a deep breath. “I’m leaving Jo,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady and strong, failing miserably.
“Woah…why? What happened?” she almost exclaimed, her eyes wide with surprise. Sure, the couple had gone through a lot of turmoil in the past, but she thought that his marriage was going fairly well as of late. Lisa couldn’t say that she thought he had the perfect marriage, because she knew he didn’t. After some of the looks he had given her and his reaction to the love scene, she knew that at the very least Hugh’s eyes were betraying him. But she didn’t see this coming at all.
“The love isn’t there anymore. She doesn’t fly over to see me, then she nags that I never come around to spend time with the kids. I cannot win. And honestly, I’m ready for it to be over, but that doesn’t make the decision an easy one,” he confessed. With that, Hugh turned to look at her. Tears were pooling in both of their eyes. She felt for him, understanding that this was a big deal for him because she knew him that well. Hugh felt things more deeply than most and the emotions that he had bottled up were coming out a bit. No one could read him quite like her, he knew. They really did have a unique bond and that’s what he was banking on.
Lisa felt a few tears hit her cheeks and wiped them away. She wanted to comfort him. To show how immensely she cared for him. “Hugh…I’m sorry,” she whispered, giving him a hug from the side. His arm wrapped around her and pulled her close as his own tears began to fall. Make-up was going to hate him when he went back on set later.
“It’s not your fault, Lisa. I promise. It had gotten bad before…that,” he assured her, in vague reference to the love scene, sniffling a bit. Having her near him helped more than she knew. It was what he had needed all along. She was what he had needed all along.
She laid her head against his chest, savoring the scent of him; his soap, peppermint from the mints he always had and the bland smell of his character clothes. After a few comfortable moments, Lisa pulled back some and looked at him. Her hand lightly brushed across his stubbled cheek. “It’ll be ok,” she whispered, trying to reassure herself as well.
Hugh smiled a bit. She was so damn adorable. Beautiful. Sexy. And he loved her more than she’d ever know. That was about the only thing he was sure of. “I know,” he whispered back. With a bit of hesitance, he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers in a feathering kiss, almost as if he was asking for her permission. After all, he was a British gentleman, and an apprehensive one at that. Lisa returned it and added more pressure to answer his request. His hand moved up into her curls, gently bringing her closer to him. He needed more. So much more. Hugh let his tongue flick over her lips and she promptly parted them for him, her arms winding around his neck as their kisses grew deeper. When breathing was beyond necessary, they parted and he let his lips move to her neck. A moan disguised poorly in an exhale left her as his mouth found that spot right above her collarbone that drove her crazy. She needed to ask him before he made her lose all rational thought.
Her breathlessness was apparent when she found her voice. “Are you sure about this?” she asked. Her hands, which had been caressing his chest, stilled as to not distract them until he answered her, one resting on his bicep and the other on the back of his neck.
Hugh pulled back, his eyes filled with panic and pain. “You’re not?” he inquired, his heart dropping three stories at the thought of her rejection. Had he pushed her too far? Did she even want him at all?
“Oh, I’m sure, but I need to make sure that you are,” she responded, her fingers traveling to his cheek once again. If he wasn’t ready, completely sure that this was what he wanted, she needed to stop him now. Maybe it was too soon for this, and it would tear her to shreds if he regretted it later. If he regretted her later.
His mouth stretched into the first real, but soft, smile of the day. “I’ve been ready for quite some time, dear,” he assured her, leaning his face into her touch before he turned and kissed her wrist. Lisa’s bright smile made an appearance and she fisted his shirt in both of her hands, tugging him slowly to meet her lips again. But this time, neither of them held back. It was all teeth and tongue causing slight sounds of pleasure to come from both of them. Before they knew it, she was straddling his lap, cradling his face in both of her hands as she kissed him hotly. She needed him and he needed her just as badly. An all-consuming need that would burn them alive if it wasn’t acted on. It was a good thing they were actors, fully prepared to play out the next scene that life had in store for them.