7:19 in the morning
i've come to the conclusion that jesse mccartney not only scarily resembles but actually is aaron carter. we're on to your little secret. we understand how you couldn't live down the shame and disaster that is "aaron's party" so you had to find some way to keep the money flowing - a la pretending your name is jesse mccartney and singing songs about beautiful souls. i'm impressed, because that is a pretty high thought level for a carter boy.
but we know its you. just like phil collins IS sting, right? the same way that michelle branch IS vanessa carlton. and how ricky martin IS the skeevy man crouching in your bushes with binoculars and a sony handycam, panting heavily while waiting for you to fall asleep so he can rummage through your trash for old toast crusts and used paper towels to add to his you-shrine before returning to the grungy, dimly lit apartment that he shares with his mother to review the day's tapes from the surveillance camera he installed in your shower while you were out grocery shopping last sunday. right?
ok, so i admit that maybe i was a little harsh. maybe michelle branch isn't really vanessa carlton. i mean, i guess they can both be successful musicians who happen by chance to look a hell of a lot like eachother. that i can live with.
but there is a serious chance that ricky martin really is in your bushes, so take some initiative and go permanently sew your curtains shut immediately.
he's THAT creepy.
as in livin' la vida loca.
as in protect yourself.
but we know its you. just like phil collins IS sting, right? the same way that michelle branch IS vanessa carlton. and how ricky martin IS the skeevy man crouching in your bushes with binoculars and a sony handycam, panting heavily while waiting for you to fall asleep so he can rummage through your trash for old toast crusts and used paper towels to add to his you-shrine before returning to the grungy, dimly lit apartment that he shares with his mother to review the day's tapes from the surveillance camera he installed in your shower while you were out grocery shopping last sunday. right?
ok, so i admit that maybe i was a little harsh. maybe michelle branch isn't really vanessa carlton. i mean, i guess they can both be successful musicians who happen by chance to look a hell of a lot like eachother. that i can live with.
but there is a serious chance that ricky martin really is in your bushes, so take some initiative and go permanently sew your curtains shut immediately.
he's THAT creepy.
as in livin' la vida loca.
as in protect yourself.