(no subject)
I have been reading about the different medicare plans I have to choose from and I am so overwhelmed. I'm always thinking 'WHAT IF I CHOOSE THE WRONG THING!?' The primary care physician I see in East Pete seems to take 2 of these 5 plans (Gateway and UPMC) and I don't realy know much about them. Back in the days of being an undergrad® I had Aetna for a bit and then United Healthcare.
I sluggishly plugged in a search for SRS and medicare just to see if there was any semblance of hope for that, but I didn't really expect it, and there didn't seem to be. Wouldn't it be cool if I got government assistance and could get all my boob fat sucked out and wear V necks in the summer? I do.
I'm really exhausted from running around Philly all weekend. It was strange trying on bridemaid dresses. Not strange because I like dresses, but strange because I don't think I'd been collectively referred to as 'ladies' so much in one day. I got seriously depressed for a couple hours, and then confused, and then started thinking about cultural dysphoria vs body dysphoria, and the fact that being out in public with their constant projections of the very dichotomized sex-gender coorelation they expect everyone to embody really exhumes and exacerbates my anxiety-prone self loathing. Then I was ok again and ate 1,000 lemon bars in Kate's basement while we watched Indiana Jones.
I want to eat a lot of potatos right now, but I've really taken to Never Leaving My Room when there are other people in the house because I am afraid they will see/talk to/notice me.
By tomorrow I'll have a healthplan. Neat. My top priorities/dreams and aspirations are to: renew my drivers license with the sex marker (because it is ridiculously easy in Pennsylvania) and move out of the back of my mom's house again. It's at that point where I go to sleep fantasizing about living somewhere else and it gets incorporated into my dreams. I will be very very excited to have my own apartment/house/closet/whatever again, regardless of shithole status.
Oh oh oh oh, also going to Canada! That's sort of a short-term goal, but that's going to happen in August. I'm convinced it's going to happen, so I have some country-escaping summerly goodness to look forward to. Small people in a car crossing the border.
I sluggishly plugged in a search for SRS and medicare just to see if there was any semblance of hope for that, but I didn't really expect it, and there didn't seem to be. Wouldn't it be cool if I got government assistance and could get all my boob fat sucked out and wear V necks in the summer? I do.
I'm really exhausted from running around Philly all weekend. It was strange trying on bridemaid dresses. Not strange because I like dresses, but strange because I don't think I'd been collectively referred to as 'ladies' so much in one day. I got seriously depressed for a couple hours, and then confused, and then started thinking about cultural dysphoria vs body dysphoria, and the fact that being out in public with their constant projections of the very dichotomized sex-gender coorelation they expect everyone to embody really exhumes and exacerbates my anxiety-prone self loathing. Then I was ok again and ate 1,000 lemon bars in Kate's basement while we watched Indiana Jones.
I want to eat a lot of potatos right now, but I've really taken to Never Leaving My Room when there are other people in the house because I am afraid they will see/talk to/notice me.
By tomorrow I'll have a healthplan. Neat. My top priorities/dreams and aspirations are to: renew my drivers license with the sex marker (because it is ridiculously easy in Pennsylvania) and move out of the back of my mom's house again. It's at that point where I go to sleep fantasizing about living somewhere else and it gets incorporated into my dreams. I will be very very excited to have my own apartment/house/closet/whatever again, regardless of shithole status.
Oh oh oh oh, also going to Canada! That's sort of a short-term goal, but that's going to happen in August. I'm convinced it's going to happen, so I have some country-escaping summerly goodness to look forward to. Small people in a car crossing the border.