(no subject)
is it wrong for me to miss her so much?
is it wrong for me to not let her go ever?
i try so hard
and for what?
to be called a bitch
well erika
i never called you a bitch
ever
and i haven't told anyone to hate you
and no one does
and still
i get nothing
but hey
its what i have always deserved, right?
because i am a fucking bitch
and i am worthless
and i always have been
i can tell myself i matter by surrounding myself with people
and then i find someone like erika
who tells me she loves me on couches at shows
with no other motive than the feelings in her heart
and what do i do?
destroy it
i don't deserve anyone
and no one deserves to have to be near a bitch like me.
i wish i wasn't afraid and so hateful of suicide
or i wouldn't be here right now.
is it wrong for me to not let her go ever?
i try so hard
and for what?
to be called a bitch
well erika
i never called you a bitch
ever
and i haven't told anyone to hate you
and no one does
and still
i get nothing
but hey
its what i have always deserved, right?
because i am a fucking bitch
and i am worthless
and i always have been
i can tell myself i matter by surrounding myself with people
and then i find someone like erika
who tells me she loves me on couches at shows
with no other motive than the feelings in her heart
and what do i do?
destroy it
i don't deserve anyone
and no one deserves to have to be near a bitch like me.
i wish i wasn't afraid and so hateful of suicide
or i wouldn't be here right now.